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So I checked my 14YO DD's facebook last night and.......

(32 Posts)
whatishappening1976 Mon 04-Mar-13 16:17:18

She has been talking to a boy from he school that she likes, which I have no problem with, some of the things he has said to her however I am not happy about!

A part of the conversation went like this;

Him - you need to run off into the sunset with me
Her - I will don't worry - what we gonna do after we run off into the sunset
Him - yayayayaya bang all day long
Her - ...............
Him - without a condom
Her - that's er lovely - I was thinking maybe we could go somewhere but no
Him - we can go Southend afterwards
Her - Yay how cool are we
Him - we can ride the roller coaster which means you'll be riding two roller coasters
Her - Yay - what wait? HAHA
Him - my dicks the roller coaster jesus get with it
Her - I am with it I'm jiggy with it - I just realised how wrong that sounds

Then it goes onto talking about school.

Now I know that she doesn't respond in the same tone as he is talking to her. But I just do not want her talking to someone who is talking like that. She has told me many times that she really likes this boy, and they often talk on Skype, and are with each other a lot at school.

What if he asks he to go out with him, and she wants to meet up with him alone or something?

I do not want to tell her not to talk to him again, they are both part of the same group of friends, most of whom seem lovely - I have met all of the girls and some of the boys but not this one.

I am also sure that most of what he said was just him trying to make himself sound big and clever.

I just do not know what to say to her, I cannot pretend I have not seen it. She is only 14 and he is the same age, just do not know what to think!!!!

Advice would be greatly appreciated!!!!!!!!!! Thanks

whatishappening1976 Thu 07-Mar-13 11:49:33

Hello, thanks for all of your messages!

I am going to take her out at the weekend, just the two of us, and have a chat about it. I did tell her when she first got her FB, phone and laptop that by having them she agrees to me checking them anytime I want, not to snoop, but for her protection! She also knows that I often go on her facebook to send myself lives on silly games and things. As a rule I don't check, and on this occasion only logged on to make sure I was right before telling her off as my facebook that she was chatting online way past her bedtime lol (and she wasn't, she is generally a good girl) so it is just by chance that I saw the messages.

I know that girls can be just as bad as boys but am 99.9% sure she would not say things like this, she didn't even respond in the same kind of tone. She has told me that a couple of her friends have done things (hand jobs - they're 13!!!!) which makes me think that she is in no way ready for such a thing and will be more sensible. Just worried that if she does go out with this boy that he may try and pressure her?

Going to talk to her about respect, and how she needs make sure that any boy she dates respects her and how she needs to respect herself!

Fingers crossed after that I think!

lljkk Sat 09-Mar-13 20:05:42

He's immature. It's all talk. He's still figuring out how to flirt. His mind would implode if he got his hands on a real life nubile girl. She knows that intuitively.

whatishappening1976 Fri 29-Mar-13 09:33:21

Dragging this one up again, he asked her out and she is meeting him today, just the two of them!

I want to meet him, just to say hello then leave her to do her thing, but she is so embarrassed at the thought of it. Am I being unreasonable to want to meet him before she spends time alone with him?

skyblue11 Fri 29-Mar-13 09:38:21

I am sure she'd be embarrassed any teen would, last year DD went to a shopping mall, met this lad and then I met them later as she was having a lift with me, that way I got to see him face to face, you could do that?
Try not to worry too much, he was only talking that way to impress her, it what they do, and she sounds very sensible anyway

CabbageLeaves Fri 29-Mar-13 09:40:14

I think you're being unreasonable smile

You've got to equip her with confidence and self esteem so she does what she wants and doesn't bow to pressure.

I think it's tragic that Fairyliz wrote her Dd doesn't wish to perform oral sex on her first date and some girls feel this pressure. Awful. Thanks porn

whatishappening1976 Fri 29-Mar-13 09:51:44

Have come up with a compromise. I am going to take her and DS (and mindee) to McDonalds for lunch, which is right next to where they are meeting.

That way when food is finished we can walk out and he will be waiting for her, she can walk over to him then wave bye to us and I can just have a look at him, make sure he is indeed a 14 year old boy and not some sort of weirdo.

Then me, DS and mindee will be at the local cinema and if she needs me I am around for a couple of hours.

God I am so nervous!!!!!

skyblue11 Fri 29-Mar-13 20:08:44

How did it go? What's he like?

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