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Teens with older girlfriends

(12 Posts)
ParyMortas Fri 23-Nov-12 18:06:18

What a lovely post kalidasa, thank you.

He is soooo totally different from DS1 who is very shy. DS2 is a social butterfly and prefers the company of girls anyway to boys - he doesn't have to be competitive with the girls.

He has gone to the cinema tonight with said girl and her cousin. You should have seen his face when DH said he thought he might go too... (he was joking!!).

It's as well that he doesn't know what I got up to in my teens... My mother would have a heart attack if she ever found it as I was always a "good girl", I was on the sex aspect but I wasn't always where I was supposed to be and on many occasion on a Saturday night when I stopped at my friends (her parents always went out) we were riding around on the back of motorbikes with the local "bad lads" in the woods with no helmets on shock. God when I think back now at how dangerous it was...

kalidasa Fri 23-Nov-12 12:46:38

My guess is that he has great social skills, is funny and attentive but not pestering for sex and that this combination makes him v. attractive to girls a year or two older who are really interested in exploring 'a relationship' (the emotional/social side, someone to hang out with) but aren't ready for anything too intense or physical, and who find that boys their own age or a bit older are less interested in the social side (going out in a groups to cinema etc) and much pushier about physical stuff. I think it speaks well for him actually! Men who are interested in women, understand them and enjoy their company make for great partners later.

BertieBotts Fri 23-Nov-12 12:05:24

That was my experience as a "late developer" so maybe projecting a little... I didn't know any younger boys, though, so didn't end up dating any but I can see why you might if you got on well, because at that age most of the boys are obsessed with sex and it clouds things somewhat.

ParyMortas Fri 23-Nov-12 11:51:06

Bertie, I never thought of it that way.

ParyMortas Fri 23-Nov-12 11:47:48

Ooops, ParyMortas - is me Bella!! grin

BertieBotts Fri 23-Nov-12 11:44:07

She probably isn't interested in sex yet but the boys her age are sad I don't think 2 years is a massive problem with teenagers, it's probably about the max age difference I'd be comfortable with though unless you're talking 15/18 and upwards (even then I'd be a bit wary, but not necessarily a big deal)

ParyMortas Fri 23-Nov-12 11:40:55

God Rooby, I hope so!

RoobyMyrtle Fri 23-Nov-12 09:30:49

My dd (almost 14) has a 12 year old boyfriend. he's much younger looking than her and a good deal shorter. She's not interested in any rude stuff (for want of a better way of putting it!!) herself yet but likes spending time with him because he's an interesting person. Perhaps it's the same with your ds smile

Spagbolisbetter Mon 19-Nov-12 16:15:48

Tell me about it wine. Good luck!

BellaVita Sun 18-Nov-12 22:28:14

Thanks for replying.

They do loads of texting and fb but they also meet up too. He got the bus this morning to the next little market town (we live in a village) and met up with her. I picked him up this afternoon. They were sat together with another girl when I pulled up. I tried not to look, he gave her a quick peck.

God this parenting lark is hard sometimes grin

Spagbolisbetter Sun 18-Nov-12 21:56:38

I overthink everything according to my DH hmm.

I would say it is quite unusual for girls of that age to go out with someone younger, but hopefully they are just texting and sending fb messages rather than anything more dubious.

Sorry I can't offer any helpful advice - I guess you just have to keep a watchful eye and keep on communicating with your DS. He is probably flattered and enjoying the attention for now.

BellaVita Sun 18-Nov-12 19:47:50

DS2 is 13 (just). Since starting secondary school he has had numerous girlfriends. He is now in Yr8. His last girlfriend is in Yr10 and his current one is Yr9 (although at a different school), she will be 15 in Dec.

Am not sure why I am uncomfortable with this, I am very curious as to why they would want to go out with a younger boy who certainly does not look like he is 13 - very small for his age.

DH thinks I am over thinking it.

DS1 is more into his computer, bedroom and minecrafting with his mates so have not had this problem before. In fact if you were to mention girls to DS1 he would get embarrassed and go very red.

Has anyone ever had experience of this?

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