Tips wanted for living with a little hitler (dd13)(5 Posts)
I think in your situation OP I would be looking for professional help as your DD's behaviour seems to be very extreme. No wonder you are worn out. Have you had any help with her behaviour?
I agree with webwiz, this is very extreme and your post suggests that this is new behaviour as she used to be adorable. Can you pinpoint wehen this started? Is it a reaction to something that's happened? I'd say it was way beyond normal teenage stroppiness. Try to ignore the criticism of you and your friends and the food issues as they are fairly standard stuff but the destructiveness, trashing the house and being unable to leave her alone in the house must create real problems for you and the rest of the family. I can see why you're worn out. Can you try to step back and give her some space about her food, her room whilst taking steps to prevent her from getting at your things - if you have to get a lock on your bedroom door, keep your handbag with you for a while then so be it.
Having said that, she sounds very unhappy, has something happened to cause the extreme change in behaviour?
You might find this thread supportive, mus.
Definitely get a lock fitted on your bedroom door. It took me months to do it - it felt symbolic of failure, I think - but once I had, I wished I'd done it sooner. You can lock away all sorts of things that you don't want her to mess with: money, laptop, bottles of booze, anything you think she'll deliberately try to damage in a 'revenge attack'... And (probably even more importantly) you can protect a bit of private space and keep it 'safe', which will make a difference to your emotional state.
I'm really not sure about the 'bad behaviour book'... Speaking as a mother who has been through a few really bad years, I can tell you with almost total certainty that you will want to forget most of it. I am not at all sure it would be helpful or healthy to keep a record of it...
One of the most important bits of advice, which you'll find repeated over and over by people who have 'difficult' teens, is that you need to look after yourself.
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