If your teenager had underperformed at their holiday job?

[Whirliwig72]

Would you want to know about it?

Scenario is this: my friend asked at the beginning of the summer if I had any admin her 17 year old could do for me to earn some pocket money. I set them up with about a days worth of work and gave her half of the money up front (£25). This was over 6 weeks ago. I originally suggested a month to do it in- and guess what? despite repeated reminders by email and text I've heard nothing from her. I've written off the money and won't be so trusting next time when hiring someone. I wondered though if I should involve the teen's parent so that they can choose to discipline their child - if it was me I'd want to know if my teen was behaving like this but I don't want to interfere if it is not my place to do so. What do you think?

[wellwisher]

You need to be more proactive. Stop hiding behind emailing and texting, phone the daughter up and tell her if the work's not done by the end of tomorrow you expect your money back and will be coming round to pick it up.

[goinggetstough]

I would certainly mention it to your friend as it was her that arranged it. How you do this depends on how direct you wish to be. You can do it as highlighted above or call your friend and ask her if her DC is OK as you haven't had any replies to your emails and you have paid her.....
I personally would call the DC and then speak to your friend.

[Whirliwig72]

See but if I turn up at the house her mum will definitely know what's happened. I don't mind doing that if it's the right thing to do but is it?

[mellen]

Speak to the girl directly. Did she even want the work in the first place? Tell her if she wants to do it it has to be done by tomorrow/next day, or if she doesnt want to, she can repay you and you will find someone else to do it.

[FallenCaryatid]

Of course issuing a final demand is the right thing to do, you were generous to respond to your friend's request and the teenager didn't turn the work down.
I'd either email or visit your friend, depends what you are happiest with, and point out clearly that you either want the work done well, or the money returning.
She needs to know, partly to get on her teen's case about responsibility and partly so that she doesn't run out of friends.
And don't employ her again!
I have a 17 year old who has done work for friends and been paid, but he did the bloody job first.

[FallenCaryatid]

I'd involve the friend because she approached you first.

[Aniseeda]

Yes, I would want to know, especially if I had helped set them up with her job in the first place. If it was my teen, I would be making her either do the work or pay back the money and apologise. It's doing her no favours in the long run to just write it off.

She might well be thinking she'll get around to it when it suits her. Or possibly didn't really want the work in the first place and thinks, if she ignores it long enough, it will go away. Phone her and tell her you need the work done by Monday/Tuesday or she needs to return the money so you can employ someone else.

If she doesn't do either, then speak to her Mum.

[Aniseeda]

That should read 'set her up with the job'

[ToothbrushThief]

I would wish to know but I'd also give you free rein to address issue directly with my child. I'd be very glad if you contacted me and described the problem and asked me how I'd like you to proceed i.e Mum (me) return money or you speak directly to child

[Levantine]

I agree, I would ring her and say do the job or hand the money back. You aren't doing her any favours by letting her keep the money. No need to inform her parents particularly I wouldn't have thought.

Is there any reason you gave her the money up front in the first place?

[cornybootseeker]

does her mum know that you gave her half of the money and she hasn't earned it?
you do need to say something to the mum I think - I would want to know

[FallenCaryatid]

'Is there any reason you gave her the money up front in the first place?'


I'm betting the OP doesn't have teenagers and thought that giving money would imply a contract and some sort of commitment on her behalf.
It would have worked with my DD, she has a sense of responsibility. I never pay DS in advance though.

[Whirliwig72]

I gave her half the money up front since she'd come over to my house and had a quick training session (less than 30 mins) so I didn't want her going away empty handed but I did stress this was money given in advance with the rest to be given on completion

[FallenCaryatid]

If you aren't open about what's happening with the parent, it might mean your relationship is a bit strained in the future. She asked you for work for her DD, she's already involved.

[FallenCaryatid]

OP, you sound generous and thoughtful, very admirable qualities.

[Whirliwig72]

I don't have teenagers - how did you guess!

[Levantine]

Oh dear. Perhaps best speak to her mum then.

[Levantine]

Sorry, that sounded a bit patronising, wasn't intended to!

[sashh]

Did she even want the work in the first place?

Exactly what I was thinking.

Think like a teen. Your mum gets you a job without you wanting it, do you do the work?

That appart, she owes you the money. Send her an invoice.

[cornybootseeker]

Bet her mum pushed her into it...she still needs to pay it back though.