Thankful for finding this site...

[notjustme]

Found this site by pure accident on a bit of business research but I'm so glad I did.

I'm sure I will end up writing a big long post about it in the end but I just wanted to say I'm SO glad I've discovered we're not alone. We have been having all sorts of trouble with our 14 yo DD since she turned 13 last year - vandalism, drinking, smoking, stealing, lying (to literally everyone), underage sex, generally trying to mess up other people's heads and lives and being a cantankerous PITA at home. I know that individually all these things are 'normal' for today's teens but had decided it was only us and we'd have to suffer alone with her. How glad am I that i've discovered that we're not the only ones - there are other teen-twins of our DD out there causing the same kind of havoc!

I don't want to sound like I'm glad other people are having the same issues - I don't mean that at all (I wish they would all be innocent and well behaved!!), but I had begun to feel ashamed that we had 'created' such an awful thing and we must be doing something wrong - she even lies about us and her home life to anyone who will listen, the kind of stuff that someone would call SS/Police about - a tiny part of me hopes they do so the lies can blow up in her face, but the rest of me just wishes she would stop.

Anyway, I just wanted to say thanks for making me feel a little less like an awful failure and a little bit more normal - hopefully I'll be able to get lots of advice here!

[RavenVonChaos]

Hi and welcome!

Not sure I can give any good advice but my dd is now 17 and put us through hell between 14 and 16.5! She is still a major pita (I started another thread today) but so much calmer than she was. We had the police round, drugs drinking, gsce meltdown! No wonder I am nearly grey.

Anyway, hang in there and don't beat yourself up. My dd used to tell teachers that her dad was her step-dad!

Keep the faith...

[MedusaIsHavingABadHairDay]

Hi and welcome from me too...

You aren't a failure.. some teens are (relatively) easy, some are hideous, and most teeter between the two extremes (sometimes within the same hour I find!!!)

I have 4..and hell of a lot of grey hair to show for it Mine have all given me different worries at different times.. we've battled anorexia, self harm, depression , stealing, lying, smoking dope.... smashing the place up... (not all the same child or same time thankfully) BUT.... they are beginning to come out the other side:) My DS1 was horrendous from 12-16 ..he put us through it big time, but at 18 he is suddenly and delightfully human again.. mostly cheerful and polite, loving, non stealing......:)

One child has been angelic throughout.. same parents same parenting, jus different personalities.

I find wine helps....