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The World is wide open - well our house was anyway...

(5 Posts)
trident Wed 27-Jul-11 21:59:15

...what is it with teenagers - mine seems to be missing a few basic brain cells at the moment - or is it the weather...

He seems to sleep all morning and get up at noon..... and then grunt, eat, drink and distribute his detrius all around the house.

Today - was a step above that though.... We decided to go out for lunch while our 6' 3" "baby" was still fast asleep - all normal there then.... but on driving back to the house met him on his way off to the bus stop - wave to him - and then shouts across the road - " Oh - I have not locked up the house - I thought Mum was still there (Yeh - as if - because if I was you would have asked for some money from me!!).

So, the house - front door not locked - back door not locked, side gate open and all the french doors to the house wide open.... doesn't bear thinking about - the sheer joy someone would have experienced if they had walked in - oh look all this "stuff"..... cars, keys etc etc etc etc etc...

Luckily we were only about 5 minutes drive away - but .... yeh but ... yeh..

Seriously though, I am have a big problem trying to motivate an "in-betweener" - between GCSEs and 6th form (possibly).... we have offered all kinds of bribes for money in exhange for farily basic jobs to get him out and about and up ... but nothing seems to register even a glimmer of interest...

He needs money for a new pair of jeans but I am not going to hand it to him - he has a fairly easy life compared to his peers and it causes no end of arguments between me and partner. We have both been quite "get and go" people, worked hard and not expected anything handed to us and we are perhaps (slightly) disappointed that he displays none of these qualities and goes for the easy (read lazy) route on everything...

I just want to shake him......

Tell me that things improve..

We are planning on taking him and three of his friends + other associated members of the family on holiday next week - and I am dreading have four teens in the same mindset....

sunnydee Wed 27-Jul-11 22:10:51

God I could have written your post. DD seems to have turned into a vegetable since she finished her GCSEs. I pay her £20 per week to do the washing up Monday to Friday and the odd bit of hoovering but it takes her forever and she moans sooooo much.

I've given up trying to encourage her to get a job. She's totally bone idle this summer.

GnomeDePlume Wed 27-Jul-11 22:52:27

Trident do you have someone your DS looks up to (eg uncle, aunt, older cousin)? Someone who could speak to your DS about him behaving like a complete arse where your DS would listen?

Sometimes that outside influence can be what is needed.

Your DS needs to learn that behaving like a large toddler is unlikely to impress anyone (whether that is a girl or a revered relative/friend)

trident Wed 27-Jul-11 23:44:16

.. I guess it may have something to do with respect then..

Admittedly my DS has little or no respect for my DP - but that's another story... and I was hoping that would improve over time..

I am sad because at his age I was all fired up to "do stuff", earn money, move out and be something - but nothing seems to light his fire - maybe being a second family and him being our only child (there are step-brothers/sisters) - he has been over-indulged (spelling ??)..

I admit I do try the subtle approach with him and the "huggy huggy nice Mummy" crap does not seem to be nuturing the positive responses that I need from him (guess I am over compensating for DH there - but hey ho).

...well shall give him a another couple of days and try again with a more forceful approach and await the dreaded results in late August and then try to pick up the pieces. If he doesn't get the grades that he needs that he will need to scrabble around for a place at another 6th form College - still I suppose that may be a wake-up call for him.

Shame is - I have found lots of good ideas for him to make money for himself having identified several opportunities where he could sit all day at the computer and "add value" - but even that doesn't seem to motivate him... shame I haven't enough hours in the day otherwise I would develop them further myself...

mycatsaysach Wed 27-Jul-11 23:53:15

teenagers - all the bloody same
ds was out with friends yesterday came home to tell me a 'funny' story - they were all shooting each other with bb guns.i really didn't find that amusing.
waiting up for him tonight to come home from party - he has just texted ex h to say he will be coming back to his.

<shakes head and sighs>

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