Considering second tattoo years after first one triggered freakout(4 Posts)
I got my first tattoo many years ago. I thought about it for a good 6 months, decided what I wanted and got it. It is on my lower back so I don't see it unless I'm looking in a mirror. Anyway, about a week after I got the tat I had the most almighty freakout. Just woke up one morning thinking WTF have I done? It triggered thoughts of death for me - that I was going to have this thing on my back until I die. It was horrible. I then spent a lot of time researching removal. I decided I wanted it gone by the time I was 40.
Anyway this lasted for about a year. I didn't get it removed and I now like the tattoo. So it's been many years and I'm now thinking about getting another (smaller) one. I know what I want and I'm wanting it for a specific reason. But I'm wondering if the same will happen again? And if I should get it on my back again rather than someplace more visible?
What do you think? Has anyone else had that reaction after getting a tattoo?
That is quite a drastic reaction. I did have thoughts of "shit, what the fuck have I done?" after my last one (which was my largest to date and very visible) but those thoughts soon went and on doing some research I discovered that it's quite common to have a wobble like that.
I honestly don't know what to advise. It doesn't sound like you rushed or acted on impulse so wonder why you reacted the way you did?
I did freak out after my first very visible tattoo. It is big and colourful (like most of my tattoos) and I was delighted with it at first but then there was a long process of getting used to it being on my body. I do know what you mean about thoughts of death - I had those too, it felt very strange to me that I'd done something to myself that would outlive my own consciousness!
Now I merrily go around getting tattooed with not a care in the world but that piece definitely triggered some sort of traumatic shift in my self-perception.
I don't know whether you'd have that reaction again but I think it's maybe unlikely. As you say, it's a smaller tattoo, it has a meaning for you, and whilst it doesn't sound like you're someone who wants to get heavily tattooed, you've already done it once so it won't feel like such a big deal this time.
Yeah I imagine most folk have a moment of doubt. Not sure why mine was so extreme. I did have quite a "wrapped up in cotton wool" type of childhood, and didn't rebel as a teenager so maybe that was my first moment of rebellion and I had second thoughts after? My parents weren't that bothered about it though. I'd only had my ears pierced about 6 months beforehand and hadn't even had sex yet when I got it.
It's not huge but it was slightly bigger than I'd expected, because the tattooist wanted to get as much detail in as possible. I went with a friend to get her first tattoo a few months after getting mine done and she's got more than 10 now! And while I've sometimes thought "Oh such and such would be a cool tattoo" I've never felt like actually getting another until now. Also with placement, while my work is fine with people having tats on show I don't think I'd feel comfortable with them on arms or feet. So I'm thinking maybe hip or back again.
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