Advanced search

Whether you’re a beauty novice or a confirmed fashionista, this topic is for consulting Mumsnetters on all things style-related. Plus, check out our Swears By page for the inside track on the next Mumsnet must-have.

It's amazing how many people wear ^really^ bad jeans isn't it??

(52 Posts)
moondog Fri 11-Sep-09 23:30:15

Not just the elasticated M&S ones with black boots and a fleece but skinny jeans are not a good look on anyone with a bit of an arse (ie 90% of the British population). Similalry, all those low pockets and paraphernalia on arse on some jeans make people look even shorter and fatter than they invariably already are.

As you were.

MavisEnderby Fri 11-Sep-09 23:33:19

Yes,I agree.As a short,fat large arsed person I am constantly on the lookout for the Holy Grail of flattering jeans.

LOL at OP.

moondog Fri 11-Sep-09 23:37:01

Tell it like it is Mave. grin

I'd love to be a jeans fitter.
I wpould save folk so much pain and unflattering moments.

Mind you,I've had some terrible jeans in the past. A post natal pair purchased in hormonal frenzy in Matalan stil lhaunt my dreams. I should have been arrested for crimes against denim.

nancy75 Fri 11-Sep-09 23:38:38

i used to manage a very large jeans shop - there are some people that just do not suit jeans - telling them that is a different matter!

Corporalcornsilk Fri 11-Sep-09 23:38:47

I have said exactly that on here before. Jeans just don't look good on a fat arse.

moondog Fri 11-Sep-09 23:40:28

Corp, do you think so? I think denim covers a multitude of sins and its strenth is quite literally its strength and ability to hold flab in.

What do yuo suggest for the large of behind?

Were you ever frank with folk nancy?

MavisEnderby Fri 11-Sep-09 23:42:17

So in your opinion,what is the most flattering look for those short of length and fat of behind?

I usually do dark denim.Nothing to tight,it would also be a crime against humanity.But I drem of something flattering,teamed with a tunic long length top thingy to hide a multitude of sins.

MavisEnderby Fri 11-Sep-09 23:43:14



moondog Fri 11-Sep-09 23:44:12

Aye. With maybe chunky boots to balance it.

My pet hate is chunky bottoms and thinghs in skinny jeans and then fet in ballet slippers.
It gives peopel horrid top heavy inverted triangle look.

Corporalcornsilk Fri 11-Sep-09 23:44:24

Well cut trousers can make any bum look good. Jeans makes bums look wide from behind.

nancy75 Fri 11-Sep-09 23:45:24

generally i worked on the assumption that if i sold somebody something that looked shit they would be bringing it back for a refund as soon as their dh saw it, so i would normally tell the truth, however some people wouldnt be told!
i had women that would try on things they had seen in a magazine that made them look like the back end of a bus and then some, and despite offering loads of other stuff that looked a million times better, they would want the same ones as the 22inch waist 16 year old in the picture

moondog Fri 11-Sep-09 23:47:22

Oh deary me.

Corporalcornsilk Fri 11-Sep-09 23:48:03

what trousers?

nancy75 Fri 11-Sep-09 23:48:41

to make a big bum look better you need a pair of jeans that sit on the waist, with slightly larger than average pockets. pockets should be as plain as possible - no spangles of any kind. the darker the denim the better. for fat leg avoid fading/whiskering/wash effects on the thigh area.
if you are short and bigger than a 14 either a straight fit or a slim bootcut is the best bet.

WickedWitchSouthWest Fri 11-Sep-09 23:54:43

totally agree with nancy...however I have just bought a pair of apple bottoms which do things to my pear shaped arse I didn't think possible! They're a bit low on the waist tho so have to wear a top to cover the muffin top argh

ohnelly Sat 12-Sep-09 11:13:44

OMG this is my pet hate! and men are worse - just that inch too short, that really gets on my nerves

RubysReturn Sat 12-Sep-09 11:16:48

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

scarletlilybug Sat 12-Sep-09 11:19:24

Something I alsways used to find with M&S jeans - the fit was quite good (for me), but they would always shrink lengthways until one day you would realise they were a good inch above your ankle. Not a good look.

Low rise jeans above a broad arse, complete with tatty thong sticking above the waist has to be the worst look of all times, though, surely?

paddingtonbear1 Sat 12-Sep-09 11:21:30

I have a big bum but I don't like trousers that sit on the waist - am very short waisted! I don't like really low hipsters either, not flattering at all. Jeans are a real problem for me!

paddingtonbear1 Sat 12-Sep-09 11:22:22

Most M&S jeans and trousers are the worst fitting on me - don't suit my shape at all!

bronze Sat 12-Sep-09 11:24:14

Just finding jeans that are long enough will go over my hips but wrap twice round my waist is hard enough.

moondog Sat 12-Sep-09 11:25:33

Scarlet, you forgot the finishing flourish-arse antlers.

Blackduck Sat 12-Sep-09 11:25:55

Okay my Per Una jeans have given up the ghost (sob) after 7/8 years... I am size 8 and a short arse (5'2"). I want a pair of jeans that are:
light, not dark.
do NOT contain lycra or whatever
do not cost the GDP of a small prinicpality
so not have embroidery/sequins/other unnecessary stuff

So why is it so bl**dy hard to find a pair?

oneopinionatedmother Sat 12-Sep-09 11:26:36

what's with the fly that buttons only just above the fanny too?

oneopinionatedmother Sat 12-Sep-09 11:31:22

large pockets are best for bigger bums, and a pair that shapes the bum is fine, so long as it waists nicely and does not create a muffin top.

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: