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How to feel instantly gorgeous and glamorous!!

(7 Posts)
applepudding Sun 02-Aug-09 20:04:00

What you need to do (tomorrow) is take a plane out to Portugal to a beach at Viana do Castelo and you will see a woman sitting on the beach.

She looks like this:

A bit overweight (didn't stick to the pre-holiday diet)
Blobby tummy (forgot to do the sit-ups)
Blobby thighs (didn't even think about the anti-cellulite cream which hasn't worked previous years)
Strange orange stripy colour (DIY self tan - and I did exfoliate, don't know what went wrong)
Razor burn on bikini line (ouch, but waxing is even more ouch)
Uneven eyebrows (DIY plucking, the beautician is on holiday)
lopsided fringe (cut this morning with kitchen scissors as has grown since hair appointment two weeks ago!)
Nail varnish on toes (DIY manicure)

Sit next to this woman and you will instantly feel gorgeous and glamorous in comparison!!

Woman pulls on linen trousers, kaftan, floppy sunhat,large dark glasses and goes to the bar
- please tell me I won't look too bad from a distance!!

fishie Sun 02-Aug-09 20:07:25

ooh lovely, how long are you going for?

don't worry about how you look, i think the worst thing is seeing women miserable and trying to be invisible.

Meglet Sun 02-Aug-09 20:09:03

oh bless sad. I can understand almost all of the above, but why did you cut your own fringe?! Can you clip it back or wear a hair band?

Pamper yourself this week, lots of swimming and good food.

applepudding Sun 02-Aug-09 20:18:02

We are going for a week. I need to have a fringe because it hides the wrinkles on my forehead!!!

Yes, swimming and plenty of salads is a good idea - washed down with a large glass of wine of course smile

fishie Sun 02-Aug-09 20:20:53

hair will be ok once you've washed it, less blunt ends. and euro exchange rate is loads better than a few months ago so you can buy peculiar holiday clothes.

Paolosgirl Sun 02-Aug-09 20:23:20

Don't worry - no-one will be looking. They'll all be too worried about their own streaky fake tan/uneven fringe/razor burn/fat bits/wrinkles grin

Have a lovely holiday!

applepudding Sun 02-Aug-09 22:28:50

thank you smile

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