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Crimes against fashion and decency....say here what you really wanted to say to the perpetrator but couldn't

(68 Posts)
NorbertDentressangle Wed 08-Jul-09 16:36:31

To the woman cycling along our road this afternoon.......

" a black lacy thong worn under very thin, low-rise, white leggings is not a good look - especially when cycling"


foofi Wed 08-Jul-09 16:37:28


crankytwanky Wed 08-Jul-09 22:09:14

To practically every rah-rah teenager wearing leggings & a top;

"You forgot your skirt,love".

Maybe I'm just jealous that I could never get away with legging without a dress on top, unless I wanted to look like someone on Jeremy Kyle.envy

Lulubee Wed 08-Jul-09 22:36:49

To the very overweight lady who lives opposite me: purple tights and a mini ra ra skirt - NO.

DollyPardonme Wed 08-Jul-09 22:38:12

to anyone with bum antlers.


pixiemoon Thu 09-Jul-09 07:46:51

To large lady in street yesterday: luminous pink shiny leggings, luminous yellow leg warmers, stonewashed denim mini skirt - no love, just no.

To several work associates at wedding last weekend: ladies, your bras do NOT fit you. Please let me take you to a proper shop and get you fitted in the sizes that you actually are. Boobs squeezing out the sides/bottom/top of your bras is just not nice, definitely not sexy, and really can't be that supportive.

missblythe Thu 09-Jul-09 07:57:26

To DH's cousin at our wedding:

"I'm sorry I interupted your potato-digging by getting married. Would you like me to see if someone can lend you a less lumpen coat or at least help you wash the mud of your shoes?"

Northernlurker Thu 09-Jul-09 08:01:06

'luminous orange strapless boob hugging, everything hugging tops don't work with breasts of a certain age' - to the mum at school who obviously let the heat go to her head last week.

sarah293 Thu 09-Jul-09 08:07:13

Message withdrawn

NorbertDentressangle Thu 09-Jul-09 09:18:30

pmsl at the "potato digging" cousin grin

flowerybeanbag Thu 09-Jul-09 09:26:46

To overweight ladies with cellulite. No shame in either, but please confine the wearing of shorts to your gardens or the beach rather than parading in them round Sainsburys and offending my eye.

wilkos Thu 09-Jul-09 09:29:17

to teenage girls with that "fashionable" ginormous comb over at the front

this is a style for OLD MEN. just stop it now.

Mumsnut Thu 09-Jul-09 10:34:01

What, pray, are bum antlers? <dim emoticon>

brimfull Thu 09-Jul-09 10:38:14

to apparetnly trendy teenage boy
-pull your farkin jeans up or I will rip them down to your knees

Fimbo Thu 09-Jul-09 10:39:30

to:- the rather large lady with the even bigger bottom, wibbling along with your cheeks slapping from side to side in extremely thin white trousers with no pants not even a thong, is seriously not a good look.

To all the ladies with strapless wedding dresses on in todays local paper - no no no. Size 14 and under is fine any bigger is not.

KingRolo Thu 09-Jul-09 10:43:11

Fashionable hair

KingRolo Thu 09-Jul-09 10:46:18

Please, please shave your pits either a) not at all or b) properly if you are wearing a vest top. Nasty stubble is not attractive to mine eye.

sockmonkey Thu 09-Jul-09 11:27:08


To most teenage boys round here

and breathe.... thankyou OP

NoFurtherQuestions Thu 09-Jul-09 11:30:25

Message withdrawn

NorbertDentressangle Thu 09-Jul-09 12:35:59

To the early 20s young woman I just saw in Morrisons

"the idea of those summer tops with a huge "hole" in the back is not so that everyone can see the back of your bra, especially the size label sticking out. Even it was, it would be a good idea to avoid the 1000wash grey bra"

OrmIrian Thu 09-Jul-09 12:41:18

Look at your bavkview in the mirror before leaving the house. Or alternatively don't try to squeeze your size 18 backside into size 12 leggings or jeans.

notamumyetbutoneday Thu 09-Jul-09 13:45:34

For the woman in Asda last week who must have been at least a HH cup size and whose image is forevermore burned upon my retina: Asda sell bras for like a fiver. Why not try one?

bobblehat Thu 09-Jul-09 13:51:41

To the lady I saw in town the other day with a t shirt with the slogan 'prone to mood swings' - In need of a good bra would be more appropriate.

notnowbernard Thu 09-Jul-09 13:59:00

"Good Lord, lady, how are you even able to SIT DOWN in that ensemble?!"

To the size 18ish woman who had squeezed herself into a pair of trousers at least 2 sizes too small. The most shocking camel's foot I've ever seen shock

And so tight you could see the cellulite through the (thick cotton) material

alexpolismum Thu 09-Jul-09 14:00:19

To the guy with the huge beer belly hanging over his belt who lives opposite me: Please, please, please put a shirt on!

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