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Styling mom jeans if you're bigger - updating my look

52 replies

sarah20212021 · 01/10/2021 21:43

I'm 2 months post baby and I have reluctantly realised I look very dated and I need help!

I'm a 14/16, fast approaching 40 and my uniform is M&S jeggings and a baggy shirt so I can BF and hide a wobbly tum. Before kids and a pandemic I wore skinny jeans, a blouse or t shirt and a fitted blazer, with ankle boots or Nikes.

Suddenly I feel like a total frumpy dinosaur, and that all my clothes signal I've lost myself and not left the house for 18 months (correct). I really want to feel more confident when seeing friends and colleagues.

I think it's the skinnies that are dating me most. But how do you style mom jeans if you're not slim and 22? Surely tucking in a T will only accentuate my tummy? How do you give yourself some shape? Any Instagrammers who are larger for inspiration?

I've seen And/Or, M&S and Mint Velvet mom jeans recommended here - what's best for a 16?

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yellowmelon · 01/10/2021 22:01

Ooh - I'm interested in this! Also struggling with post baby wardrobe. Can we add being short into the mix too?!

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HayleyLouise145 · 01/10/2021 22:04

Feel this!

New mum and baby is 9 months old. Prior to getting pregnant I would live in mom jeans. I was a size 12/14.

Post birth my figure has completely changed; my hips are much wider and I'm now size 16 in that area. I find that mom jeans are actually quite difficult to style with a 'mum tum' and have moved much more to wearing a-line dresses with trainers for a casual but stylish look. Much more flattering for my new pear shape.

I am 100% confident with my new body and that's heavily down to completing cleansing my social media of influencers I don't relate to.

Some EXCELLENT mid/plus size people are now follow are;

georgiamillie
__beingbrittany
styledby.chloe

May be the opportunity to step out of your jeans comfort zone Smile Hope this helps!!

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sarah20212021 · 01/10/2021 22:27

It's so reassuring to hear I'm not alone, thank you.
Maybe dresses are the way to go, but I just want to pull on something comfortable day to day and feel more confident and stylish!

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NoTimeToDye · 01/10/2021 22:46

Similar size and shape. Me and mom jeans don't get along.

Got some wide leg jeans and those work much better and still seem to be on trend. Spend a lot of time just in skinnies and shirts tho!!!

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HayleyLouise145 · 01/10/2021 22:50

@sarah20212021 Totally get it! Especially on days when shaving my legs is just too much hassle Grin

If I do wear jeans I find a slightly oversized shirt (maybe plaid, lightly striped or double denim if your feeling daring) is the most flattering for me.

I'll either tuck one side in and let the other hang over for a bit of help hiding the tum or tie a knot at the waist. I find the slight baggy-ness of the top balances out my hips but keeps the waist Smile xxx

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whatswithtodaytoday · 01/10/2021 22:51

I've given up - I feel so frumpy in them, they just don't look right on a 40 year old size 18 with a c section tummy.

I'm delighted that my 90s favourite kick flares are back in fashion, so have bought a couple of pairs of them and some new skinnies instead 😁

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Soontobe60 · 01/10/2021 22:52

I wear Spanx (cheap versions) under my mum jeans, and tuck a t shirt in then layer with a shortish sweatshirt or cardigan, so you can see my shape. In a 5’ 2” size 16. I do find that I need to add a belt though as they slip down throughout the day, and do then just look like jeans that are a couple of sizes too big. I turn up the hems and wear with trainers if wet, Birkenstock’s if dry.

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Preech · 01/10/2021 22:56

I'm a 16/18 and couldn't get on with mom jeans. All I could see trying them on was my own mom, back in the 90s!

Non-skinnies that have worked for me post babies have been high-waisted slim flares and straight leg. The straight legs I have fit fairly neatly on my legs (think athletic, chunky, Miss Eaves thunder thighs...), and then flare out a smidge at the ankle.

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RobertaFirmino · 01/10/2021 22:58

You deserve to look fantastic. If mom jeans do not flatter you then don't wear them just because they are 'in'. You will look far better in something that suits you rather than something that the rag trade dictates you buy.

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Mollymarvelous · 01/10/2021 23:12

Can anyone link to alternatives they’ve found and loved.

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PaulHollywoodsLowHangingFruit · 01/10/2021 23:21

Give these mom jeans a hard pass. Minging.

Straight leg or flare with something slouchy on top. Cropped jersey wide legs are also a good update.

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Ozanj · 01/10/2021 23:26

Are you short or long waisted? Is your mum tum top stomach, lower stomach or both? How tall are you?

I am 5 ft 7, short waisted, quite drastically pear shaped and this is accentuated even more by a lower mum tum. I personally find that high waist straight / mom / wide leg leans don’t work to flatter me at all. But mid or low rise make me look spectacular. So play around with rises.

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HayleyLouise145 · 01/10/2021 23:48

@Mollymarvelous I have 3 pairs of 'ASOS high rise farleigh mom jeans' and I swear by them. Lots of different colours, hem styles and sizes. Very stretchy, comfortable and more of a straight leg than mom jean!

I would recommend sizing up if you get a black pair though Smile

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HayleyLouise145 · 01/10/2021 23:52

This link is super useful to find out your actual body shape...

www.calculator.net/body-type-calculator.html

I then just googled shapes of dresses, jeans etc. That flatter that shape

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JSL52 · 01/10/2021 23:58

You need Bootcut , Mom jeans are awful unless you're skinny.

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sarah20212021 · 02/10/2021 07:54

So glad I started this thread. First steps-

  • going to do that body shape calculator tool today
  • going to look at bootcuts as a more flattering option (I'm post C section too).

    Are we sure sure sure bootcuts are "back"? They so remind me of the early 2000s so it's going to be peculiar figuring them out for my 40s. Honestly I feel I blinked and fashion became a foreign language I could no longer understand.
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sarah20212021 · 02/10/2021 08:19

I have 2 pairs on their way to try (will post pics if I'm brave):
And/ Or Venice Beach boyfriend and
Hobbs Niomi bootcut
Plus a couple of frilly blouses

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Alloutofglove · 02/10/2021 09:21

Hi Op. I'm a couple of years your senior, same size and with peri in full swing.I've just bought some M and S Harper jeans. They're straight legged with a bit of stretch. I feel way more body confident than I have in ages in them www.marksandspencer.com/high-waisted-cigarette-jeans/p/clp60465497

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sarah20212021 · 02/10/2021 10:14

[quote Alloutofglove]Hi Op. I'm a couple of years your senior, same size and with peri in full swing.I've just bought some M and S Harper jeans. They're straight legged with a bit of stretch. I feel way more body confident than I have in ages in them www.marksandspencer.com/high-waisted-cigarette-jeans/p/clp60465497[/quote]
Ooh these look right up my street, thank you!

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wombforanotherone · 02/10/2021 10:49

I agree that the mom shape is not that flattering for a lot of people but a cropped slim/straight leg gives a similar look without the ugly taper.

I also really want to get some wide leg/flares but I'm scared of the wet bottoms!

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shouldistop · 02/10/2021 11:14

Mom jeans wouldn't suit me at all. I wear mid rise, straight leg jeans that are ankle length for the most flattering look for me.
I also wear dresses a lot, even if all I'm doing is school run and baby group. I find them easier than coordinating a top and bottom.

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JSL52 · 02/10/2021 18:23

@sarah20212021

So glad I started this thread. First steps-
* going to do that body shape calculator tool today
* going to look at bootcuts as a more flattering option (I'm post C section too).

Are we sure sure sure bootcuts are "back"? They so remind me of the early 2000s so it's going to be peculiar figuring them out for my 40s. Honestly I feel I blinked and fashion became a foreign language I could no longer understand.

Bootcuts are definitely back and flares , they are everywhere.
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izzybobsmum · 02/10/2021 23:02

I am a size 16 and just bought the Eloise wide leg jeans from Fat Face. A lot of the reviews said they were good for curvier figures. They’re such a good fit. Hugh waisted too and not too much stretch so they hold my tummy in! www.fatface.com/women/clothing/jeans/elise-wide-leg-jeans/971049.html?dwvar_971049_color=vintage%20pale&cgid=women-clothing-jeans#start=11

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londonmummy1966 · 02/10/2021 23:11

I'm quite a bit older than you but a similar size and found skinnies just aren't cutting it for me anymore. Mom jeans don't work but I have bought a couple of pairs of jazz pants from a ballet shop - like leggings but with a bootcut shape. I've been wearing these under short shirt dresses and leaving the bottom few buttons undone. Seems to work.

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Talipesmum · 02/10/2021 23:18

Also 16/18 with similar dilemma. I spent hours trying on trousers and jeans in m&s recently (normally like next but they were closed) and ended up with boyfriend jeans from m&s. Really comfy and while they’re loose, they’re not too wide around the hips so they didn’t make me look too comedy. I’m still a little unsure how to “style” them on the top half, but gawd they are comfy to wear at home, and I think they look nice.

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