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Hairdressers, why does my hair never turn out like I hoped?

(20 Posts)
Richtea15 Tue 13-Aug-19 10:55:33

I’m getting so frustrated with my hair rarely turning out how I want it to. It generally turns out too light, or when it does look nice, it soon fades back to very blonde.

Most recently, I wanted a change from my ashy, blonde highlights ( with lowlights!) hair. I firmly decided I wanted to go darker, and warmer. I showed the hairdresser the Pinterest photo attached - she matched the colours. She added more bleach to it, to my puzzlement, but I went with it. My hair is still very blonde, as you can see pictured (although definitely warmer, which is nice!). Now, the hairdresser has done a good job of my hair - if I wanted to stay so light. But I really, really just want to phase out the blonde! Is it my hair type? It’s very, very fine, so I know that any highlights/lowlights are never going to be as obvious as in the Pinterest photo. But is it because it’s so fine, that it just looks blonder? What do I need to ask for to get it right? I’m getting tempted to just box dye it - Something I haven’t done in years! Please talk me out of doing something drastic blush

youvegottobekidding Tue 13-Aug-19 11:28:25

I’m no hairdresser myself and your hair colour looks gorgeous btw, however looking at that Pinterest pic, it looks like you should of had some lowlights put through as opposed to more bleach? When did you have it done? If it was like very very recently, i’d ring & tell them you’re not entirely happy with the result as it’s not exactly what you wanted. I’d be really careful of using a box colour on highlighted blonde hair as if you try to add a darker colour, it can result in a khaki shade. Hth.

Richtea15 Tue 13-Aug-19 11:42:17

Thank you - it isn’t bad in itself, I just wanted to go darker! sad I should add - the hairdresser DID do the darker, warmer brown colour, mainly at the roots, then added the blonde as a sort of balayage. I think the colour itself would’ve been fine, just through my hair as lowlights.

It was a couple of weeks ago when I had it done - it was slightly darker, but even then not like the picture. I knew it’d fade quickly - even using shampoo for coloured hair.

Richtea15 Tue 13-Aug-19 11:46:04

The ends especially are really blonde.

browzingss Tue 13-Aug-19 11:50:32

It’s very, very fine, so I know that any highlights/lowlights are never going to be as obvious as in the Pinterest photo.

That’s interesting, I’m not a stylist so I wonder why? In my opinion, it just seems like the wrong technique/colour placement is the issue rather than the density of your hair. The model’s base colour looks much darker than yours so the highlights contrast more.

Richtea15 Tue 13-Aug-19 12:00:16


You’re probably right about the base colour - I would’ve been better off going a bit darker than I want, given that it’ll fade anyway!

My hairdresser always does really fine highlights because my hair is like baby hair, haha! Otherwise they’d look chunky and horrible I suppose. But it probably does have more to do with the base colour tbf

browzingss Tue 13-Aug-19 12:09:10

Oh wow - I have fine hair too and prefer thicker highlights! Actually makes my hair look thicker than super fine highlights!

Would you feel comfortable complaining to your stylist? It doesn’t seem like they delivered what you wanted. You need the majority of your hair tinted to the warm brunette/auburn with some blonde left out. It looks like they tinted the roots but you need the darker colour through your lengths too. I agree that it doesn’t seem like the bleaching was necessary.

NoTheresa Tue 13-Aug-19 13:42:03

The wavy style is the pic of the model is a nicer style. Maybe you should think about either not straightening your hair - if you do - or doing it in waves.

Richtea15 Tue 13-Aug-19 14:28:08


I agree - those waves are much nicer! I think I need a wide-barrelled curling wand to achieve it, though. Whenever I try it with my thinner wand, it goes poodle-like. So I give up and straighten it...

Alienspaceship Tue 13-Aug-19 16:27:47

I’ve got exactly the same problem. I want highlights, my hairdresser puts in foils but I end up with what looks like a block of colour. What do I need to ask for?

Alienspaceship Tue 13-Aug-19 18:46:45

Bumping this thread

Gamble66 Tue 13-Aug-19 20:55:15

The picture is balyage on a much darker base than yours - plus waves and great lightning get the dimensions to stand out
Your hair looks fine and a bit damaged so will probably not hold darker tints very long over bleach

Gamble66 Tue 13-Aug-19 20:57:07

You need to ask for balyage it will give you natural sweeps and ribbons of colour rather than babylights which if very fine really just lighten the over all colour and add s little texture

GreyHare Tue 13-Aug-19 23:33:38

I would say it's because the bottom of your hair is damaged from colouring/bleaching/heat so it won't hold the colour.

Richtea15 Wed 14-Aug-19 12:28:33

Thank you for the replies! I’m tempted to have all the blonde lobbed off and get a shoulder-length bob. My hairdresser last year (I moved to a new area, recently) did my foils with Olaplex, cut and style all for £50. The olaplex kept my hair in lovely condition. Stylists around here, however, charge a fortune just for foils themselves, nevermind with Olaplex. So perhaps I’ll have a cut, colour close to my natural hue, and leave it alone!

Gamble66 Wed 14-Aug-19 16:31:40

Have all the dead cut off - keep your roots natural and transition to balyage with Olapleax - you can probably then go 6-8 Months between colours if you have no grey at the root and keep the ends trimmed

Richtea15 Wed 14-Aug-19 18:30:44

@Gamble66 Thank you for the advice - I’ve definitely got no grey, in 24 grin xxx

Gamble66 Wed 14-Aug-19 19:25:43

😂 transition to balyage then x keep your natural root and you will just need a refresh of the blonde occasionally maybe ask if they can drag a little level 6 through to break it up a bit ? Re curling try a cold curl method of you can loads on you tube - heat + bleach is just asking for more damage - especially on fine hair - save the heat for special events

Poppysball Wed 14-Aug-19 19:48:53

Gamble66 I would like the balyage look but I do have some grey at the roots. I recently had my brown hair highlighted and it now looks very (too) blonde although the grey roots are less noticeable than when it was brown. I feel it’s too blonde for my skin tone however. Do you know how I could transition to balyage from this and how would I cover they greys?

Sorry for the hijack OP but I also feel like I never really get what I want at the hairdressers!

Gamble66 Wed 14-Aug-19 22:41:27

@poppysball - a root smudge slightly lighter than your natural colour will aid transition and give you longer between touch ups - you need almost what is called a reverse balyage to tone down the blonde - so a root drag/ smudge that is then also dragged down in inverse sections

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