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Self harm scar on arm

(50 Posts)
Sassysarahh Wed 20-Jun-18 22:06:03

Well it was all such a blur was having a breakdown and out came a razor ... now I have ugly slugs of scars on my arm and it's kind of obvious it's not from an operation ... so we get sunny weather and I have to cover up 3/4 sleeve or a thin cardy.... any other suggestion I feel makeup draws attention and I sweat like a pig anyway ... shouldn't have done it but unfortunately I was in a dark place and it was a cry for help xxxxxx

CourtneyLovely Wed 20-Jun-18 22:32:30

I wear mine with, not exactly pride, but I certainly don't cover them up. They're my war wounds and they made me who I am today.

I very rarely get asked about them because I think these days most people recognise self harm scars and just don't ask. If anyone does mention it then with children in say I was hurt and it makes me sad to talk about it, with adults I'm quite blunt in explaining it.

As I said I'm not proud, but neither am I ashamed. My scars are the proof I survived.

Griefbacon Wed 20-Jun-18 22:36:19

They’re nothing to be ashamed of but I used Tropics balm stuff on an accident scar with success. Smelt of curry which was odd but worked to minimise redness

Sassysarahh Wed 20-Jun-18 22:36:49

Awww thank you for that .... I had tattoos on other Scars and you know what they are signs of survival xx so thanks for that ... I should stop worrying what other people think ... but my husband can't stand to see them

Sassysarahh Wed 20-Jun-18 22:41:18

Awww griefbacon I'll give it a go thanks xxx I've been using bio oil it still tender 18 months on xxx

TantricTwist Wed 20-Jun-18 22:47:28

Kat Von D and Dermablend are best at covering up scars.
I did see an amazing tattoo artist who covered up scars with skin coloured ink.
Hope you're feeling better these days and I totally get that your DH feels upset at your previous sadness when he see's them.

AllergyToWine Wed 20-Jun-18 22:48:49

Sorry to hear what happened to you, OP. Hope all dark places are gone now. From your post I get that you have scars not on wrists right? So they cannot be covered by some sort of jewellery : think stacked bracelets or nicely tied silk neckerchief (as bracelet) , or leather-wooden massive cuff maybe?
If it’s your upper arm then firstly maybe you could look into blouses territory. You know, the folk ones, or airy poplin-cotton ones? They are way more summery imo than cardigans. I travel to my home country every summer, and it is more convenient to have my arms and shoulders covered with thin natural material, and I see lots of people prefer dresses and blouses with sleeves as opposed to tank tops or t-shirts. It covers from sun rays and wicks sweat as well. I have seen lots of this kind of tops in H&M, M&S, Zara, Next even at Tesco (F&F clothing).
Second thought: my friend back home had scars on her wrists. She covered them with tattoo. I am not tattoo person myself, don’t have any but loved it on her. She had a lovely fern leaf, it looked so stylish. Also I know that there are temporary tattoos in shops (have seen some on Etsy), maybe you could try those ones?

TantricTwist Wed 20-Jun-18 22:50:31

It's this guy and apparently he does it for free in Dublin.

They have taken down the video's but what I saw looked pretty amazing and they were pretty much invisible

AllergyToWine Wed 20-Jun-18 22:51:13

Oh, and Bardot tops and dresses, OP! That big frill on them will leave shoulders open but might cover upper arms?

Trialsmum Wed 20-Jun-18 22:54:22

I have scars on my arm from when I was a teenager so they’re 15 years old. I’m gutted that they’ve never faded. Adults don’t ask me about them but children do and I tell them I was scratched by a cat a long time ago. It’s a good enough explanation for kids.

Sassysarahh Wed 20-Jun-18 22:55:48

Aww guys thanks so much for your kind words of advice and genuine care. Yes I had scars on my arms wrists but I have a tattoo it's pretty ok xx I wear lots of bracelets too unfortunately the newest scar is on the inner upper part of the arm I've brought a overly light cotton 3/4 sleeve folk style blouse in peacocks and Tesco has bee a lie saver clothes wise xxx maybe when its fully healed I'll tattoo the serenity prayer I've come a long way and don't want to ever be in than dark place xxxx thank you all and god blesss you xsmile

Sassysarahh Wed 20-Jun-18 22:57:41

TantricTwist Really ?? Free??? Omg I only live an hour from Dublin I'll try and find who he is

TantricTwist Wed 20-Jun-18 23:01:27

Brilliant OP look him up, I'm pretty sure he has a waiting list but put yourself on it, he does it specifically for lovely people like you.

Herja Wed 20-Jun-18 23:01:53

You said 18 months and still tender? Keep an eye on those. I've had a couple I thought had healed, only for them to sort of explode a year or so down the line. They'd healed over the top and left an abcess. Any (unusual, I get that it does just itch sometimes) itching or increasing redness and I'd check with your GP.

AmberCurtain Wed 20-Jun-18 23:02:01

I've given up trying to hide mine. I know people notice them but no one has ever really asked me about them......including my family.
My daughter is the only one that's ever mentioned them and was satisfied with the lie I told her. if she asks again when she is older I will tell her the truth.
I'm not proud of my scars but they do act as a reminder not to do it again. I still struggle with fighting the urges to self harm and sometimes that reminder being there stops me in my tracks.

Sassysarahh Thu 21-Jun-18 15:38:04

Aww Herja yesss mine are really itchy and almost like a worm on surface maybe get my gp to check them

Mountainsoutofmolehills Thu 21-Jun-18 15:50:09

img1.etsystatic.com/041/0/8098040/il_fullxfull.580325809_rkfx.jpg

this lace cuff... or a beaded cuff... Also OP, you know, when we share our sorrows and triumphs we connect with people. Maybe it's worth people seeing them, you might save someones life, someone who can reach out to you because they know you understand this special kind of suffering because you have survived. The black dog is a hard one to beat. Wear with pride- you don't know who is watching.

Sassysarahh Thu 21-Jun-18 16:25:33

Thanks for your kind words xxxx

Sassysarahh Thu 21-Jun-18 16:28:15

I went out today in loose funky pants and a short sleeved vest top .... I'd made an effort with my make up hair and accessories and I just took a deep breath an rockkkked it!

TMMHF Fri 22-Jun-18 18:43:54

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Sassysarahh Fri 22-Jun-18 21:14:18

Thanks ks for the advice xxxx I thought bio oil ws IT will def try your reconditions xxxpp

mintmagnummm Sat 23-Jun-18 09:03:44

I have scars up my arm for the same reason OP and if anyone asks me about them (adults) I'll just tell the truth. Luckily a child hasn't mentioned them yet but I like the cat scratches idea mentioned above although I'd have to make a point of saying the cat was just playing as wouldn't want them to start fearing cats!

Herja Sat 23-Jun-18 13:43:36

I'm glad you just braved it @Sassysarahh ! It's too hot for long sleeves.

Exactly like you describe, mine were like itchy worms on top of my arm. One day when I scratched one split right open to the abcess under it - healed much better the second time though. Do keep an eye on them.

cricketmum84 Sat 23-Jun-18 14:19:03

I was gonna say bio oil too, although cocoa butter worked wonders on my stretch marks after DD.

I second the tattoo idea smile something meaningful, I just had a dandelion clock blowing into birds on my wrist, it symbolises wishes for a better future and freedom from the past. Might be worth thinking about once you have had the all clear from the GP and the tenderness has settled.

I think you are so brave speaking out and being so honest about what you have gone through, I know from personal experience how hard this is. Sending positive thoughts that your recovery continues and you start to love yourself as much as the people around you do.

ForSaleChesterDraws Sat 23-Jun-18 21:59:26

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/feeling_depressed/3270966-How-to-explain-my-self-harm-scars-to-children-sorry-if-this-is-upsetting
I posted similarly about this the other week.

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