Dress me! Formal dinner in NYC

[WhatWouldFlopDoToday]

Dh’s work is very generously paying for me to go and stay with him for a few days while he is over in NYC working for 3 weeks in March.

There is a formal dinner on one of the nights that partners are invited to. This sort of thing fills me with dread at the best of times, but this time I don’t know anyone apart from dh, it’s in a city I don’t know and I have no bloody idea what to wear.

Any suggestions? It’s black tie, I’m 5’8” size 12 with cracking legs from the knee down, shoulders to knees is a bit of a disaster area that doesn’t need highlighting!

[WorldPeasAndSweetcorn]

Fashion Advice

[WorldPeasAndSweetcorn]

What’s your budget?

[WhatWouldFlopDoToday]

Thanks worldpeas That’s not quite the look I was going for though!

I have some savings that I’ve always planned on spending on myself so bigger not too much of an issue - not 1,000s though!

[WipsGlitter]

I'd not go mad spending on a dress for one night. Are you sure it's black tie?

[OlennasWimple]

Do you know what other women are going to be wearing? (Any photos from previous work dinners floating around on the internet?)

Would you feel confident to leave shopping until you get there, then hit Macy's and Bloomingdale's to look for something? (Take a couple of pairs of shoes and bags with you to maximise your options)

[WhatWouldFlopDoToday]

It’s definitely black tie as dh has been to one before but without partners. I haven’t seen any pictures sadly and dh doesn’t notice what people are wearing at all - only that the women were wearing dresses. I know I’ll get it wrong either too dressy or not enough. Should I just go for (not all that) lbd with some nice jewellery and posh shoes?

[OlennasWimple]

The big thing is whether to wear a cocktail dress (probably) or if long dresses are expected. Can you find that out?

Personally I would always rather be too dressy than underdressed, but of course ideally you would want to get it right...

NY big earners are likely to have big rocks to show off, by the way. My biggest suggestion (unless you have some yourself) is not to go down the bling route as your lovely diamonds will probably look tiny in comparison

[OlennasWimple]

Hopefully I've done this right, but @Want2besupermum might be able to help with suggestions on dress code

[VanillaSugar]

Go to Reiss and do as Kate Middleton does. You can't go wrong.

[calzone]

What about a fab black jumpsuit with a statement necklace and completely clashing shoes?

[calzone]

Get new underwear and a proper bra.

Get hair blow dried.

Shellac manicure

Job done ✅

[NotEnoughCushions]

If it's definitely formal and black tie I would go long and fairly elegant. Would much rather be overdressed than the only one in a cocktail dress. I know they don't have the size but something like this www.houseoffraser.co.uk/women/frock-and-frill-sequin-maxi/d827596.pd#277008649 with high heeled sandals, clutch bag and understated jewellery.

[halfwitpicker]

Want2bsupermum had a great thread about dressing in the US. About two years ago.

You have to wear tights and get your nails done. Other stuff too obv

[halfwitpicker]

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/style_and_beauty/2346464-Dressing-for-work-in-an-American-corporation

Am I good or what?

[ImNotChangingMyUsernameAgain]

LK Bennett has a number of great options:

www.lkbennett.com/product/CDELOUISEPOLYESTERMultiBlack%20Chalkrose~Elouise-Black-Lace-Dress-Black%20Chalkrose

www.lkbennett.com/product/CDNICHOLSILKVISCOSEPrintGold~Nichol-Gold-Silk-Dress-Gold

www.lkbennett.com/product/CDNICHOLSILKVISCOSEPrintGold~Nichol-Gold-Silk-Dress-Gold

www.lkbennett.com/product/CDSALENAPOLYESTERMIXBlackBlack~Salena-Black-Dress-Black

[ILoveMrDarcy]

Look at Reiss and Coast definitely. Nice heels too.

[SenecaFalls]

You have to wear tights and get your nails done.

But not opaque ones. But if you wear a long dress, you may want to wear strappy sandals; in which case, no tights.

I would probably go for a long dress in a dark color, but simple, no glitz.

I agree that hair and nails will all be impeccable, including a pedicure if you wear sandals.

[MountainVista]

LBD from a brand that you can't buy over there!

Second calzone's suggestion, it's hard to out-groom Americans

[KickAssAngel]

I live in the US mid-west, which is def. hicksville compared to NYC.

But - if black tie, I would expect full length dress, and black would be unlikely. Think more like 1980s prom dress style. There's likely to be lots of gold jewelry and blingy rings, with fairly big blow-dried hair (or super smooth, chic, updos).

However - as a Brit, you can get away with something you feel more comfortable in, and pass it off as Euro-chic.
e.g. a floaty hi-low dress with flowers on would be unusual in the US, but pretty standard for a UK wedding and/or evening do. Plain black would be unusual unless it really is super, super upmarket. Plain white also unusual. But you could prob. get away with either and claim it's standard in the UK.

[Iwanttobe8stoneagain]

I’m a big believer in wearing what suits you. Look on you tube at royal Caribbean formal nights on cruises out of the US (99%american clientele and not many old people) to see if any style catches your eye maybe.

[WhatWouldFlopDoToday]

Thank you so much!

I hadn’t considered wearing Reiss and passing myself off as KM. If I get a dress from there then I have an excuse to spend loads of money on a pair of shoes.

It’s going to be pretty bloody posh - the companies honorary president will be attending and he’s a prince although a bloody idiot of one. So I’ve got the added worry of flicking food at him and being excommunicated or something.


I don’t think I can bring myself to wear a long dress, I didn’t even do that for my wedding. I’m going to order a few bits tonight, when they arrive I shall solicit opinions again if that’s ok.

[Swimminguphill]

There has just been a great thread about a black tie event where the OP ordered a lovely black jumpsuit and a gorgeous Phase 8 dress to try. Both cover arms and lumps iirc and I thought she made excellent choices - there may also be some good suggestions on there. Can anyone link to it?

[Swimminguphill]

Also on the parisienne thread Botemp linked to an online designer discount shop (towards the end of current thread) with some stunning givenchy and st Laurent dresses for a couple of hundred quid, and she gave a 15% discount code. I was so tempted by a black velvet givenchy number but then remembered I don’t live in the film Sabrina (even remotely).

[Swimminguphill]

Be still my beating heart

[Swimminguphill]

Showcase some fabulous lower legs with this