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Entire contents of wardrobe on bed. Help!

(26 Posts)
SmileAndNod Tue 20-Jun-17 10:54:26

So this is the first summer that I'm working and also the first summer for a long time that I'm too big for me. So i can't squeeze into any of my lovely summer clothes and I'm carrying too much weight to be comfy.

I work in a school with no air con. Hate my legs. Hate my fat arms. Was thinking about this dress. Do you think this would provide enough coverage or would I look even bigger?

I'm just so hot and bothered and uncomfortable and miserable. I'm trying to cut the alcohol and watch what I eat but I'm getting bigger and bigger. I feel like I'm in a downward spiral that I have no control over and this was the last straw this morning.

Any suggestions please? Everyone else looks so cool and floaty and I'm a hot sweaty blobby mess sad

phoebemac Tue 20-Jun-17 15:09:07

Aw, don't hate yourself Smile. I am an average weight and feel hot and blubbery at the moment, very few people can look good when it's as sweaty as this. I bet you don't look that bad at all.

I think that's a nice dress, but there's a fair bit of material in the skirt, so if you are carrying a bit of weight in the middle it might not be flattering - I find this with a lot of Boden dresses myself as I have a bit of a tummy, but strangely find slim fitting stuff is more flattering.

phoebemac Tue 20-Jun-17 15:15:00

I wish I could make some suggestions, but tbh I have found it impossible to find anything nice that suits me and my curves this summer.

MikeUniformMike Tue 20-Jun-17 15:25:29

The dress is pretty but it is a bit short of sleeve and length and it is quite low cut. From my experience of that brand they are quite flatteringly cut. I'd personally go for something looser and floatier.

If it's any consolation I feel blobby and sweaty right now.

SmileAndNod Tue 20-Jun-17 16:16:48

Well it's good that I'm not the only one - I think - but where are people finding stuff? Is it because everyone at work is so much slimmer? Thought about a maxi dress but then they are usually sleeveless.

Feel very desperate and have no idea what I will wear in the morning. I'm mid 40s so can't wear young stuff any more. Not that I'm ever sure I did but I like more classic than quirky.

blueskyinmarch Tue 20-Jun-17 16:20:40

I am in my mid 50's and a size 16. In the summer if I want to look smartish I wear loose linen trousers and a nice cotton tee shirt and sandals I know linen crumples but I find they still look fine despite this. I don't like dresses because I get the dreaded chub rub and it makes me feel even more uncomfortable.

Pestilentialone Tue 20-Jun-17 16:27:32

Hide all the too small stuff in a suitcase and stuff it under the bed (or similar) don't let it torture you.
Have a look at what is left, you have not been walking around naked for the last couple of months. Make a sensible shopping list.
The dress you link to is fine. For this weather something looser is ideal but may not get worn much at other times. A dress with more arm cover may get more wear. So that is three cheapish dresses you require.
What size are you now? The sales are on, we can help find something.

Sonotkylie Tue 20-Jun-17 16:37:16

HI there. We are all blubbery heaps. Its not Just you. I have a dress from Asos - Monki Stripe V neck ruffle hem dress. Its cotton and massively oversized i.e. I am a size 12 with big boobs and am wearing a XS, which is cool and large. I tried my usual M and it was immense. So try it but size right down - buy a couple to compare. (I would link but Asos website not playing). They also do it in plain blue if the strip is too Big Top for you!
And try linen/ cotton 3/4 length wide/ straight leg trousers. Again Asos do brilliant ones - try searching linen peg trousers. I had some last year I was fine in on v hot day in Rome. I just wore them with v neck cotton t shirts (I like Gap for them)
Asos have brilliant postage and returns so go a bit mad and send back what doesn't work. Look for things that are classic rather than trendy/ youthful and my experience is they are well made and fit well, and are cheap so you don't resent paying out for things you don't wear that much.

maggiso Tue 20-Jun-17 16:39:26

I think we all feel a bit blobby in this heat, so try not to feel disheartened.That dress does look nice, fresh and comfortable- and looking fresh is part of the battle in hot weather. The coolest feeling dresses are often the loose shapeless ones- and then only the fabric saves the day. Boden usually do a long length if you are taller and feel the hem is a bit short for you.
If its any consolation I have all my summer clothes out at the moment with exactly the same dilemma! (no air con where I will be tomorrow and my old cool dresses don't fit any more either...) And to top it all I got stuck in a dress!
I have just ordered a couple of linen shift dresses ( I am too short for anything else) from Boden too (Rosemary and Delfina)- hopefully one will fit! Its really hard to find cool work appropriate dresses (or even tops) with sleeves this year! Really I don't think anyone notices. Everyone will be feeling hot and bothered too.

Pestilentialone Tue 20-Jun-17 16:48:08

Something a bit different but not shocking.

Pestilentialone Tue 20-Jun-17 17:20:46

Slightly boho from Wrap loose and sleves.
Super sexy but has sleeves
And the Toast sale has started finally sensible prices
Your are not old yet.

CatACombs Tue 20-Jun-17 17:28:24

You could consider a short sleeved linen loose cardie.

You can then wear sleeveless or anything under it and it provides some arm coverage and skims over bum or any bits you don't like.

Here's one from windsmoor www.windsmoor.co.uk/windsmoor/linen-short-sleeve-cardigan/020041689.html

SmileAndNod Wed 21-Jun-17 07:09:21

I wrote a long post last night amidst poorly children and my phone died in me.

I suppose I'm a 16. I've put on 3 to 4 stones in the last year or so. Previously I was a 10 12 in bottom and my wardrobe is full of this. My life is out of control. I'm trying to get a grip of myself but I can't. I've cut out my medication, stopped alcohol in the week. I can't face an exercise class just yet. I used to do pilates before my breakdown 2 years ago but am too ashamed of myself(and too tired ) to go back. I'm on the list for counselling but the wait is long.

Anyway that was a bit of background, back to the clothes. Thank you for the links - that pretty kitty dress is something I would have gone for but my arse / hips / thighs are too huge. Not sure about toast. Usually I'm quite a safe boden/joules/white company dresser but without the outlandish patterns.
I started work after 5 years in the spring and had just about sorted clothes for work. Was not prepared for summer though!

Feawen Wed 21-Jun-17 12:06:01

Congratulations on getting back to work. I know this is a style and beauty thread, but it’s a big achievement, and something to be proud of whatever you’re wearing ;). Now, on to the clothes!

The dress you linked to is fun but I find the print plus the bow detail a step too far and a bit fussy for someone who wants a classic style. It’s not wrong it just depends on what you like. This one with a bit of ruching might be an alternative: www.boden.co.uk/en-gb/womens-dresses/jersey-dresses/ww270-blu/womens-breeze-daisy-bed-ruth-jersey-dress

This black dress from Jigsaw is classic, loose but with some shape to it, and the slightly fluted sleeves are on trend without being ostentatiously trendy: www.jigsaw-online.com/product/flare-sleeve-midi-dress/J32297_BK000 . You could dress it up with a piece of simple jewellery like a silver bangle (or anything else you fancy). The Jigsaw sale has a few things I’m coveting.

Pure Collection have some knee length, sleeved dresses in light fabrics including silk-jersey, linen and cotton: www.purecollection.com/clothing/womens-dresses?page=2. Scroll down past the scary orange bardot number at the top of the page!

At the cheaper end of the high-street, Dorothy Perkins often have fit-and-flare stretch cotton dresses, including longer length ones that hit below the knee if you prefer that. For example this one comes in standard and tall: www.dorothyperkins.com/en/dpuk/product/dresses-5699972/womens-dresses-5686813/navy-floral-short-sleeve-dress-6689105?bi=20&ps=20, or this one looks to have slightly longer sleeves but is viscose: www.dorothyperkins.com/en/dpuk/product/dresses-5699972/womens-dresses-5686813/floral-kimono-sleeve-fit-and-flare-dress-6421883?bi=200&ps=20. I find they don’t last forever but are a useful stopgap. Esprit are also worth investigating for a wide range of dress styles at a similar price point.

C0RAL Wed 21-Jun-17 15:06:14

Working in a school is demanding and responsible. If you are holding down such a job then your life is NOT totally out of control. You obviously have skills and strength of character and you will be able to deal with the problems you are facing bit by bit.

Just thought I'd say that flowers.

SmileAndNod Wed 21-Jun-17 15:31:30

Oh thank you coral. I think I sometimes lose sight of that. I sometimes feel very broken but I'm not.
I'm going to order the Boden Ruth dress and hope the ruching covers the sins. It looks like it would do for work in the autumn as well with some heels.

Pestilentialone Wed 21-Jun-17 16:30:52

Smile I agree with Coral.
Could you get both dresses?

C0RAL Wed 21-Jun-17 16:44:45

www.next.co.uk/g842048s4#739415

Might be too informal, depends on your school. Sadly only navy pink and light blue floral left in your size. But 50% linen and a bargain at £26.

I've tried it on and IIRC it's just above the knee on me and I'm 5'5".

C0RAL Wed 21-Jun-17 16:57:28

I am wearing this today and it's very cool, 100% cotton. Style may be too severe for you though if you are Boden fan

www.uniqlo.com/uk/en/product/women-crisp-cotton-a-line-shirt-dress-193001.html?dwvar_193001_color=COL69&dwvar_193001_size=SMA005&cgid=IDshort-sleeve1283

www.uniqlo.com/uk/en/product/women-jersey-flare-sleeve-dress-199723.html

Only £15! 50:50 cotton polyester jersey

Lots of other dresses although mostly sleeveless and not expensive. As long as you can face ordering a large or extra large as uniqlo sizes are for Japanese women wink

Pestilentialone Wed 21-Jun-17 17:23:49

Going cooler does mean going looser linen mix with sleeves
Everyone needs something not particularly flattering but very cool and comfy. Sweaty and restrictive is never a good look.

rizlett Wed 21-Jun-17 17:29:52

Maybe get rid of all the clothes that are too small - I've recently done this - it was sad 'letting' them go but they were just making me more sad - every time I opened the wardrobe. If I change size I'll just buy some new things then.

blodynmawr Wed 21-Jun-17 18:20:50

I have the Boden Phoebe dress for work which is 100% cotton. I'm larger than you and do not feel a sweaty mess in it smile. I size down for most Boden dresses with flared skirts as I don't like too much billowing.... (I have the Boden Ruth dress from last year and whilst it is flattering it would be too hot in this weather). I have had other good summer dress finds at White Company and Kettlewell this year. HTH smile

blueskyinmarch Wed 21-Jun-17 18:24:44

I have that Next linen dress in Navy with a bright floral pattern. It is not at all informal looking. In fact it is quite dressy.

SmileAndNod Wed 21-Jun-17 18:32:48

I've actually ordered and returned both that next dress (which I wanted to like) and the phoebe. The next made me look even bigger around the middle to get a size that would go over my hips /thighs/ bum. The phoebe I wasn't mad on the pattern and it made me look a bit matronly.

Off to look at white company and always forget about Kettlewell. Think it was pushed too much when I had my colours done (winter).

SpiritedLondon Wed 21-Jun-17 19:24:38

I am a size 16 and I'm wearing an Indian style dress from East which is completely not my usual style but it's the coolest thing I had in my wardrobe and is very flattering. Usually I like very minimalist shapes from Cos and I do suggest you check out their sale at the moment. Alternative you might want to browse AliExpress who ship from retailers in China. I know it's a bit random but they have loads of linen and cotton dresses that look similar to toast and the like at the fraction of the cost. You can also take a photo of what you want and it will pull up similar items. I have found lovely shirt dresses in chambray and cotton for under twenty pounds. You can photo items from magazines etc and if you get the app you get discounts. Ps I usually get chub rub but today stuck on some " baby skin" lotion designed for your face and it's worked a treat....and I have walked a couple of miles this evening. If you want me to link to some items that I like then I will but I'm conscious it may not be to your taste.

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