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Does anyone else wish those who wish to sneer on S&B just wouldnt bother

(142 Posts)
DeidreInaQuandry Thu 25-May-17 09:35:31

Or maybe MNHQ could set up a sub-forum: Style & Sneer

I'm sick of the threads about looking mumsy, frumpy, too old for this, don't shop here, fashion no nos. Yes, I know I don't have to open the thread. Yes, I may commit some of these supposed fashion faux pas.

I just think there are a lot of threads started to make people feel a bit shit about themselves. And others to make the posters feel superior.

OuchBollocks Thu 25-May-17 09:38:25

Eh? Its called style and beauty. People are obviously going to comment if they think something is neither stylish nor beautiful.

MaybeDoctor Thu 25-May-17 09:39:14

Agreed! Some of these threads are barely-veiled bitchiness.

There is one this morning saying that having a teeny bit of trainer sock showing is a style no-no. Well, developing athletes foot is hardly going to make the cover of Vogue either...hmm

echt Thu 25-May-17 09:39:50

YABU.

It's about style so very opinionated.

JassyRadlett Thu 25-May-17 09:39:55

Maybe there should be a 'validate my choices' sub-topic instead.

yousignup Thu 25-May-17 09:43:14

Ah, I suppose that's the thread I started. I haven't actually noticed any meanness at all. Just good natured comments and tips about little things I've never really considered before. No, it was not a thread started to make people feel shit about themselves. Just an interest in what little things people think look better / worse.

DeidreInaQuandry Thu 25-May-17 09:46:39

yousignup - no, this is not a taat. A general observation on several threads on S&B.

newdocket Thu 25-May-17 09:51:06

I don't think people are sneery, generally. I don't agree with some of the style rules that you sometimes see banded about but each to their own!

CrispyBathTowel Thu 25-May-17 09:54:28

I find MN has become a lot more sneery in general but that S&B is still relatively OK.

I think it's OK to express an opinion or dislike for something. Generally the OP is asking for an opinion on whatever item they are posting about - we can all be expected to like it. It's OK to say that you don't and it's generally done in a non-sneery way.

CrispyBathTowel Thu 25-May-17 09:55:15

we can'tall be expected to like it

JaneJeffer Thu 25-May-17 09:55:28

I think you're taking offence where none is intended. Wear what you like not what another poster thinks you should wear.

I think S&B is one of the best forums on here with people often going out of their way to help others out

Smeaton Thu 25-May-17 09:57:03

The best thing to do with posts in S&B, and other posts on forums anywhere in the internet, is to mentally attach: "IMO" at the end of everyone's posts.
Some people do put it in, others don't, but every reply to any thread is only ever from the opinion other poster, so whether it is there of not, it is exactly that, an opinion.

IMO.

DoorKnee Thu 25-May-17 10:01:28

Mostly people posting here do want an opinion on something though, so it's not always going to be positive. Mumsy and frumpy are a shortcuts to describe certain looks. I'm not offended by mumsy - I am a mum, I dress in practical clothes to look after my kids. Today I'm in a pretty cliched outfit of stripe t shirt, denim shorts and salt waters. We all have our own ideas of what's stylish or comfortable or whatever. So just own it instead of being offended by the opinions of strangers on the internet.

SugarMiceInTheRain Thu 25-May-17 10:01:56

I do agree to an extent. I posted in S&B once as I'd found a really good moisturiser that seemed to be clearing up my spots nicely and keeping my skin moisturised well and it was a bargain at £5 in Asda of all places, thought I'd share in case anyone was interested. All I got was a load of bitchy comments accusing me of advertising confused I've seen posts in S&B where posters are really helpful but it's not been my personal experience.

DoorKnee Thu 25-May-17 10:05:51

I'm interested in your moisturiser Sugar

yousignup Thu 25-May-17 10:08:00

Me too! I also just googled salt waters, I had no idea what they were.

Smeaton Thu 25-May-17 10:08:22

Me too Sugar
Would it work on blokes skin or will it burn like acid? grin

CrispyBathTowel Thu 25-May-17 10:10:02

I'm surprised that you were accused of advertising by referring to Asda. If you had linked to an small website raving about some homemade moisturiser or posted a link to some Forever Living sellers page, I could understand the advertising accusations then. But not Asda. A lot of posters on S&B normally like reading about bargain beauty buys. Sorry that wasn't your experience Sugar

sugarbeep9 Thu 25-May-17 10:10:40

i agree. i found the worst threads where posters start posting about not wearing x because of their body hang ups. i found it incredibly depressing and made me more upset about something i hadn't thought of as that bad intil someone described it in a horrible way that just sticks to my mind for the rest of the day.
i think its good to seek support and be honest about body issues but the level of insecurity and body hatred made me feel down and upset about mine, too.

example: "im so fat i look awful in skinny jeans i used to be 8 stones now im 9 my body is disgusting. i look like a barrell as im only 5ft3".
this.. like i get its upsetting for the poster. bit the way its been worded makes me at the same height and 13 stones feel terrible at what i must look like to other people.

yousignup Thu 25-May-17 10:11:01

Actually I read that as "moisturiser sugar", like some kind of exfoliating cream. I am interested - I've always used expensive Clarins, but my skin is changing a lot, and a few samples of cheaper brands have actually been pretty good.

sugarbeep9 Thu 25-May-17 10:12:36

smeaton thats a good tip. imo wink

BusterGonad Thu 25-May-17 10:17:50

I love S&B and just take things with a pinch of salt, I appreciate that everyone has different tastes, the only thing I get annoyed with is the make up threads when people start getting bitchy to the make up wearers and also the to trim/remove your pubic hair always starts a riot! shock

echt Thu 25-May-17 10:21:35

I just think there are a lot of threads started to make people feel a bit shit about themselves.

The red mist descends.

No-one makes anyone feel anything. The moment I read this on AIBU, Relationships, in RL, I mentally reach for the revolver.

How you feel is up to you.

sugarbeep9 Thu 25-May-17 10:22:39

remember the whole maxi skirt/dress on short and or overweight people? or how a size 12 isnt good enough or a 14 is fat.
and the whole vanity sizing thing. i was so happy squeezing into a 12 then get told its the equivalent of a 16 or 18 in old sizes. true but depressing.

Maudlinmaud Thu 25-May-17 10:23:46

I have noticed this. Yes it's opinion but you can give it in a nice way.
Example poster links to a pair of shoes.
Replies are oh no I wouldn't be seen dead in those. Awful. Horrible. What where you thinking etc.
It's a little mean. I don't think anyone would offer those opinions in real life.
Unless of course they are these...

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