I'm going through the same and am also mid thirties. I suspect it's hormonal in my case. I've tried lots of things but what is helping most is the Dermalofixa Daiky Microfoliant. It's a mild exfoliant with salicylic acid and it has really helped smooth out rough areas. I've tried loads of alternatives but keep coming back to it and have decided to just suck up the cost now. It's working much better for me than other acids ( Pixi, Clarins etc) that I've tried. Clinique Moisture Surge moisturiser is an super hydrating yet weightless gel creme and that is helping my skin feel more comfortable too.
Watching for advice on a serum! My skin is very patchy now and uneven in tone so maybe something with Vit C?
I second Cakes on the acid toner. I've started using Paula's choice BHA 2% and it's been a game changer in terms of spots and blackheads.
Also, is your skin dehydrated? Mine is oily but dehydrated - the way you can tell (according to the wonderful Sali Hughes) is: if your skin looks better in a humid climate, or when it's wet (e.g. after the bath/shower) then it probably is. Mine is like this and I started The Ordinary hyaluronic acid and this has also really helped.
Do you use serums at all? I know lots of people who say this can be a game-changer.