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feeling and looking old!

(42 Posts)
nashvilleaddict Sat 25-Feb-17 06:07:31

I'm 37 and I've been rather stressed lately. I have one child and my husband is always away with work. Lately I look it the mirror and I look so bloody middle aged. I look rough. Sick of making the effort and still looking shit, I used to look nice! Anyone else feel this way?

SorrelSoup Sat 25-Feb-17 06:24:56

Oh yes! Avoiding alcohol and cigarettes works, plus sleep (easier said than done with dc). I hardly drink anymore but when i do i look so haggard. If I keep on top of my hair colour I look better. I've been wearing extra make up lately to try improve things but it doesn't always help. I'm looking really pastey. Perhaps we just need some sunshine!

getupyoulazygit Sat 25-Feb-17 06:54:03

My NY resolution was to be less slovenly.
I've started properly looking after my skin, blow drying my hair instead of clipping it back and wearing make up most days. Instead of chucking on jeans and an old hoodie I'm making an effort to look a bit smarter. I definitely feel better.
And yes to needing some sunshine.

nashvilleaddict Sat 25-Feb-17 07:23:38

Glad it's not just me. I do wear make up, blow dry hair, but decent clothes. Makes no difference! confused

kneesupfatty Sat 25-Feb-17 08:37:29

Yes - me too! I'm also 37 and have realised that I've reached the age where I need to put more effort into looking half decent good. In my twenties, I found it fairly effortless, but not so much now....
I know it's boring, but exercise and drinking more water has really improved how I look and feel and I've put an obsessive amount quite a bit of time into thinking about which 'look' actually suits me and my lifestyle.

nashvilleaddict Sun 26-Feb-17 03:56:35

Kneesupfatty - I've been trying to do the same. Also a bit obsessed. Trying to put together a sort of capsule wardrobe and throw out all my crap. I got some new skinny jeans last week and now I think they look bloody awful, I've done okay with the rest of the clothes though.

Laiste Sun 26-Feb-17 08:52:52

They say every 10 years or so (or is it 7?) you need to do a change up with your hair, clothes, make up. Anything you're still doing the same after 10 years is likely to be in need of an overhaul ect.

For me late 30s was when i suddenly realised my looks had 'peaked'; things were not going to improve, and the future meant full on panic about failing looks serious effort even to simply to maintain what i had taken for granted for the last 20 years.

kneesupfatty Sun 26-Feb-17 09:02:56

Yes, yes Laiste - that is exactly it. Lord!

womanwithoutasong Sun 26-Feb-17 09:03:57

Yep. Now's the time for good nutrition (supplements even), fresh air, daily exercise, no drinking or smoking, lots of sleep, facials and body care (proper routines) and the dreaded self grooming. It's a real battle after 40 too as you'll have peri- menopause to contend with too.

Shamoffour Sun 26-Feb-17 09:07:15

I felt like this a couple of years ago. I'm 39 now and I feel much better. Not as good as in my early 30's but as good as I can be. Things I did/do are-

Hair blow dried every couple of days-I never wear it up as it doesn't suit me
Make up every day
A bit of fake tan- not orange just a healthy glow
Eyebrows waxed and tinted
Shellac nails every few weeks
Botox a. Couple of time s a year

I'm a very casual dresser jeans and Stan smiths and a tshirt/sweatshirt but with all this done I feel ok.

Shamoffour Sun 26-Feb-17 09:09:13

Sorry I meant to add I quit sugar, carbs and don't really drink. I also look after my skin and drink 3 litres of water a day.

troodiedoo Sun 26-Feb-17 09:12:50

Another 37 year old with the same here! Following for tips. I've started grooming maintenance reluctantly. Water is indeed the best advice, chug it down.

kneesupfatty Sun 26-Feb-17 09:17:07

Nashville Just out of interest hoping I can steal some ideas, what look are you going for and what's in your capsule wardrobe?

ShyOyster Sun 26-Feb-17 09:25:50

I'm 34 and have the same issue. I had DS when I was 30. Before that I never even looked my age, having a child, sleepless nights, stress, money worries and comfort eating and drinking wine aged me significantly.
I used to look good with hardly any effort. Now I need to think about what to wear, make up needs to be flawless, it's like all of a sudden everything requires to be actively maintained. It was exhausting to start with but I've been making small improvements all year and a lot of it has become a habit. I've also come to terms with the fact I'll never look like my 20-something self again grin
I drink plenty of water, try and avoid crappy food as much as I can (I love fat and sugar so that's really hard for me), plan my outfit the night before and iron everything, look after hair (cut and colour every 6 weeks), brows and nails. A bit of fake tan also helps but that's because I'm naturally unhealthily pale.

Purplehonesty Sun 26-Feb-17 09:36:41

I feel the same. I am 36 and wake up looking like death every day.
I look pale and pasty and I'm sick of it. Dark circles under my eyes even if I sleep well.

Recently got myself some new clothes and making an effort to blow dry my hair every second day.

It's really long and I have it highlighted every 3 months but even that isn't helping.

I need a miracle in a bottle I think!
Going to try a tan, more water and exercise more often and see if that helps.

troodiedoo Sun 26-Feb-17 09:56:26

Product wise, I've found Estee lauder night serum and Mac primer to get good results. Also find yourself a quality signature scent. Mmm you smell nice! Is a really uplifting compliment to receive.

specialsubject Sun 26-Feb-17 10:53:49

Enough sleep and less stress, easier said than done. Decent food.

Make up adds years ( that's why teens slap it on) so be careful.

Gruach Sun 26-Feb-17 11:01:32

Okay ... I'm sorry you're not feeling your best - but why automatically equate looking "rough" with being/looking "middle aged".

I'm extremely middle-aged and I can assure you I never, ever look rough (outside of the house anyway ...).grin

MissMogwi Sun 26-Feb-17 13:56:25

I need this thread. I'm 37 and in the last year started to see a change. I've put in to place a few new regimes but need more!

I have always looked after my skin but it began look dull and blah. So I have started using No7 range and it looks great after just 2 weeks. I can't use any harsh peels or what have you as v sensitive skin.

I've lost a stone (needed but due to illness) which has helped but could do with another 7lb off.

I'm drinking more water - again being ill has kick started this. And low carbing too, to stop bloating and sluggish feeling.

I need a wardrobe overhaul too I think.

I have two beautiful teen DDs so I look like a haggard crone next to them anyway 😩😂

nashvilleaddict Sun 26-Feb-17 15:13:51

I don't know how to tag people on here, I'm a bit crap!

I have definitely changed my hair, I cut it off into a bob as I was sick to death of it longer. A friend told me it makes me look younger.

I wear a lot less make up than I used to, but I use good products, I also look after my skin. It's quite sensitive though.

I don't drink lots of water, I drink tea!!blush I try and then I stop, it's probably my downfall. I also like sugar. I'm slim (ish).

The capsule wardrobe is my own version really. I stay at home with my DD so I'm casual. I mainly wear skinny jeans with neutral tops - grey, cream, navy, black and I have a few nice pairs of black, beige and tan boots. I've chucked so much out. I still have to get rid of a bit more, but it's expensive to replace everything at once.

Great tips though, it seems like a thing that happens at 37! Thought I would look like a teenager forever!!

Also, it did all go downhill after having a child in my 30s. Stress and less sleep I guess!

nashvilleaddict Sun 26-Feb-17 15:21:13

Never smoked, don't even drink either really

LoisWilkersonsLastNerve Sun 26-Feb-17 15:29:02

I noticed a big change in my skin when I hit about 36, I now need to look after my skin and wear a bit of makeup whereas before I could be much lazier! I've found cutting down on sugar helps for some reason.

GeneralTFuckup Sun 26-Feb-17 15:40:54

Watching with interest! Just turned 38 and suddenly feel old and frumpy. I don't feel able to spend money on facials, nails etc, my one extravagance is hair colour at the salon every 6 weeks. Wondering if I should invest more in myself though! It's only downhill from here for me hmm

Strokethefurrywall Sun 26-Feb-17 15:56:20

I look at pictures of myself when DS was born and I look amazing - dewy skin, clear eyes. Now, whilst I don't look old or have many wrinkles, there is definite loss of volume in my face which makes me feel I look older.

In the last week I've stopped wearing foundation and the difference in my skin tone is remarkable. Less redness in my cheeks and I look younger for sure.

I'm getting some juvederm on Tuesday to plump my lips and marionettes. They're only slight but I'm going to stop the slow slide into aging as much as I can!

It's horrible how quickly it creeps up 😞

Honey1975 Sun 26-Feb-17 16:18:08

MissMogwi which no7 products are you using? I've just had a look as need new mousturiser but wasn't sure which to go for. The one for ageing was quite pricey! Definitely need to make more effort though with my skin now i'm 41.

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