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Is there any product out there to 'ashen' my yellow locks?
Yep, lee Stafford one is good. Bleach London is even better and the Jerome Russell silver toner better again. Put LOADS of it on and leave for half an hour. Then put a blob into your conditioner aswell.
Bleach London definitely! I tend to leave it on my hair for a little bit while I wash/shave etc and it turns any brassy or fading blonde bits nice and ashy again, it's the purple bottles, not sure if it's called purple shampoo or silver shampoo but you'll recognise it by the purple bottles
I would dig into my pocket and go to the hairdressers tbh. I spent years dying my own hair and faffing about with it never coming out as I wanted. Tell the hairdressers exactly what you want and it's their job to get it right.