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Following mature beauty advice has made me frumpy!!

(28 Posts)
Jmangel Wed 11-Jan-17 17:46:43

So over the last 6 months or so, I've lightened my makeup - no eyeliner just subtle brown eyeshadow, less foundation for fear it may collect in lines etc., lighter lip gloss as opposed to more striking lip colour. I had my hair lightened too on advice of hairdresser to hide grey and be more forgiving to my fading, ahem, beauty. I'm 44.
So felt ok about it all and thought I looked ok but lord, in the photos taken around Xmas, I literally looked like a monotone faded old lady with no definition. My face and hair just kind of melted into each other.
Now, I'm totally confused. I know that to go dramatically darker with hair colour would be a big step and I know I don't want to get into garish makeup territory - so what do I do now? I wore eyeliner today for first time in months and it did look harsh on me - maybe because my hair is too light? Gash! Any advice. For reference I'm a warm toned mid brunette usually level 5 with NC25 skin and green eyes. I'm now a level 8 titian colour and look washed out. Advice please.

Jmangel Wed 11-Jan-17 17:47:48

That was Gah!

Bambinho Wed 11-Jan-17 18:23:47

You ve just gone too subtle. I have green eyes and find black eyeliner too harsh for me now but greys, purples and dark brown are good. The grey metallic pencil from Aldi is great if you can find i and even though black eyeliner is too harsh I always wear black mascara for better lash definition.

Likewise my old red lipsticks now feel a bit harsh (and also bleed, very unflattering) but I look awful with barely there lip colour. I prefer solid colour lipsticks in slightly less bright shades.

singleandfabulous Wed 11-Jan-17 20:07:06

You need to get your contrast level right. With honey toned skin, green eyes and dark hair you sound like high contrast. What youve done is fade yourself out.

Which celebrity do you most resemble?

Find one and then copy thier style. Liz Hurley perhaps?

On more mature people, it tends to be lighter application rather than lighter colour that works, so gloss instead of lipstick; line your eyes with wet brown shaddow instead of black liquid liner; use creme blush not powder, satin foundation instead of matt; loose waves instead of helmet hair etc..

Doobigetta Wed 11-Jan-17 20:28:51

I'm sure you're at least 15 years off "fading"- could you have gone too light with your hair?

MrDacresEUSubsidy Wed 11-Jan-17 21:14:10

44 is young!

Could you keep the base colour of your hair lighter, but go for some lowlights to add a bit more definition and movement?

I use eyeshadow as liner as liquid doesn't look right on me - too harsh. Get a really good flat edged brush and press it on against the lash line. Browns, greys and emeralds are all great at giving that extra definition without looking as flat and stark as black liquid liner can.

ginorwine Wed 11-Jan-17 22:47:35

I did this and reversed it back and feel better .
I'm trying to think of positive role models who just don't care what convention tells us to do but follow what your colouring is
It will get tricky for me when my hair is fully grey and I may do the grey hair and red Lipy look but for me blond will never work .
I love how Rita of coronation street will always be a red head for eg .

Dawndonnaagain Wed 11-Jan-17 23:23:12

I'm 58 and wear very bold lipstick. I don't look awful with it on and I ensure it doesn't bleed.

Jmangel Thu 12-Jan-17 19:49:38

Ok, had a much better day today. Used a brown kajal liner all around the eyes, oomphed up the bronzer, defined brows more with the colour gel I used to use before dyed hair lighter and used a bright glossy lip crayon - Bourjois (autocorrects to bourbons - now I want a biscuit!) Peach on the Beach. Booked in at hairdresser next week to get some darker balayage roots put back in.
Thanks all.

AuntieStella Thu 12-Jan-17 20:01:08

This is why 'mature' advice is fundamentally flawed.

Not everyone wants to look the same at 15, or 25 or 30 and what might suit one person that age might not suit (or be liked) by another.

There's no reason to think that there is one 'mature' style either.

AuntieStella Thu 12-Jan-17 20:02:56

"Bourjois (autocorrects to bourbons - now I want a biscuit!)"

How very restrained of you - I'd think whiskey!

Jmangel Thu 12-Jan-17 20:14:12

No Stilla - Dry Jan here - don't remind me - would kill for one right now!

Madlizzy Fri 13-Jan-17 14:31:30

I'm nearly 47 and have bright red hair, wear black eyeliner on my upper lids and red lipstick and I look good. No need to fade into the background, you're in your prime, woman!

Floisme Fri 13-Jan-17 14:46:31

There's no reason to think that there is one 'mature' style.
Exactly. All the sweeping 'less is more at your age' advice really pisses me off. We don't all look the same.

I can't really advise on eye make up as I wear very little (skin sensitivity) but I wear lipstick to counteract that. And although I don't wear black next to my face, I wear other dark colours and look far better in them than I do in so-called 'neutrals'. I'm way older than 44.

Fairylea Fri 13-Jan-17 15:32:32

Mature to me is more like 65/70 plus. Not 44. At 44 you don't really need to tone anything down or stop wearing trendy make up. 44 is still relatively young really. I think you've aged yourself by following advice aimed at much older people.

Haffiana Fri 13-Jan-17 15:38:33

I think it is exactly the opposite. As we age, things start to fade a bit. Skin becomes paler but paradoxically ruddiness and uneveness increases. Hair also pales obviously, but also brows and lashes thin.

SO the answer is to brighten up a bit more to compensate! I have been lucky most of my life to have the sort of colouring that looked good with minimal make-up. So when I was younger, makeup used to enhance what I had. Now it replaces what I used to have, IYSWIM! These days I use a lot more. But as singleandfab said, you need to find what works now and use a more subtle application. There is nothing more ageing than using the same stuff you used as a teen.

nickEcave Fri 13-Jan-17 16:42:29

So true Haffiana. When I was younger I used make-up to jazz myself up for nights out but didn't need it day to day as I had lots of dark lashes, clearly defined dark eyebrows, even skin tone and defined lips. Now I'm in my 40s I need the make-up to define and brighten up the features that have faded.

Deathraystare Fri 13-Jan-17 17:41:43

I was reading a book about ageing and what make up you should use. It insisted everyone suited pale pink lippie! What, ladies with exotic , darker skins?? They would look really washed out! Some women look good with subtle colours, other need more defining. I deffo need eye liner pencil (cannot use liquid as eyesight crap) and need to cover red veins on face. I prefer some colour on my lips too.

Petal02 Fri 13-Jan-17 18:07:18

I will still be wearing eye liner when I'm 100 ......

Dawndonnaagain Fri 13-Jan-17 18:15:26

Deathraystare I'm of spanish descent and still have, at 58, mainly black hair (allergic to hair dye) and yellowish skin tones, which used to be a dark olive. You're right, I'd look fucking awful and a tad ridiculous if I wore pale pink lipstick. I think my children would be enquiring as to whether or not I was attending a fancy dress party!

Slightlyperturbedowlagain Fri 13-Jan-17 18:22:12

I'm brunette and find the grey strands are effectively disguised for now by a mix of high and lo lights. in my head I look the same as I did at 26

Slightlyperturbedowlagain Fri 13-Jan-17 18:24:11

Actually my MIL (who can be hard work but is very stylish) has worn full-on Adele type eyeliner since the 1960s. She's 78 and still looks great, though it's more difficult to apply now her sight is going.

MaQueen Fri 13-Jan-17 18:35:11

I'm a couple of years older than you, and a warm skinned ash blonde. I ditched the black eyeliner a few years back and changed to Bobbi Brown's Longwear gel eyeliner in Caviar (a very dark brown). It still gives plenty of definition, but is softer.

For ages, I've also been wearing Chanel lippy in 'Boy' which is quite a pretty but pale pink. But I think I now need something slightly brighter and stronger to 'lift' my face a bit more.

But I dread shopping for a new lippy...down that path madness lies...

MrAliBongo Fri 13-Jan-17 18:44:01

Hah! I read some online article the other day about the things we must not do above 40yo... Included wearing skirts more than 2" above the knee, or leather jackets. Seriously... Fuck that, big time! Who wants to resign themselves to 50 years of looking drab and lifeless?

0dfod Fri 13-Jan-17 21:34:01

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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