Would this annoy you? Relative constantly commenting on the amount of clothes I have

(25 Posts)
MurphyJim Wed 14-Sep-16 10:25:05

I like clothes a lot. I don't buy a huge amount, and don't particularly buy expensive clothes but I do have quite a lot and enjoy putting outfits together.

One relative, whom I see most days and lives very near me, comments every single time I see her on my clothes and outfit. Not in a 'you look nice' kind of way but it's usually things like "Another new top/dress?" or "I don't believe it, all these NEW clothes all the time" and "How on earth do you afford it? So many new things". This is every day these things are said.

I've taken to disengaging every time she mentions my clothes and not replying to her and just changing the subject. Even if I've had something ages and she's seen it a million times she still asks if it's new all the time.

Does anyone else get this from people? It's so annoying!

MrsSeanBean Wed 14-Sep-16 10:30:34

It does sound annoying.

In a funny, awkward way, I suppose it's possible it's meant as compliment.
Is it said by an older person?

ImperialBlether Wed 14-Sep-16 10:35:16

Do you work and have enough money? I'd be furious if I earned my own money and had someone bitching like that.

MurphyJim Wed 14-Sep-16 10:38:06

Yes we are good financially. I have a well paid job and DH has his own company plus we also have a second company that we run together. Even if I didn't work though and was a SAHM and spent 'DH's money' on clothes surely if we were both happy with that situation then it's no one else's business?

MrsSeanBean Wed 14-Sep-16 10:40:58

You could try commenting 'ooh, same old brown cardigan' (or whatever) - 'can't believe you're wearing that again...' grin

botemp Wed 14-Sep-16 10:56:26

I have a 'friend', and I use the term loosely as I avoid her like the plague, who will comment on new things asking if they're new, which is fine, plenty of people do. However, the next time I see her she'll inform me exactly what they have cost me as if I was somehow absent when I paid for them shock.

I used to politely say something along the lines that I didn't pay that for it, it was on sale, etc. which is true most times and change the subject. These days I just answer, "Yes, and?" as I can't be arsed to deal with other people's hangups about spending money when none of mine concerns them.

MurphyJim Wed 14-Sep-16 13:45:20

I've just spent the pasts 2 hours with my relative and going out with her (yes, she is older for those that asked, sorry I can't remember who asked that).

Today I am wearing a white denim skirt and the first thing she said was "You look like you're playing tennis" then comments and questions about whether my top was new and my bag and my sandals. Then we went out and she said several times that people must look at me and think "She's always got new clothes on"

I bit my tongue and just didn't answer any questions and changed the subject, but arrggghhh

sausagefest Wed 14-Sep-16 13:53:15

What about a straight 'why are you always so interested in my clothes? ' with a smile.
Then wait in silence for the answer.

pictish Wed 14-Sep-16 13:56:23

she said several times that people must look at me and think "She's always got new clothes on"

I would have replied mildly, "I doubt anyone cares enough to notice but even if they do, what of it?" <head tilt>

She is overstepping the mark imo - and getting quite bold with it. Please feel free to confront her head on. "You often remark on my clothes...why is that?"
Then feel free to tell her as politely as you like to mind her own business.

specialsubject Wed 14-Sep-16 14:35:32

what a boringly samey conversation!

try to avoid this person. Or just say 'can we talk about something less tedious than my clothes?'

that should solve the problem one way or the other - either she stop this annoying comment or will avoid you.

ImperialBlether Wed 14-Sep-16 14:46:48

Is this your MIL?

Littlebee76 Wed 14-Sep-16 14:54:35

Could there be a spot of jealousy there? Maybe she's envious of your style and wishes she had the same..

MadisonMontgomery Wed 14-Sep-16 15:54:39

My dad does this all. the. time. It infuriates me - I think it's the implication that I'm this horrendous shopaholic. In actual fact I think I buy less clothes than a lot of my friends, but I think perhaps compared to older generations we do have more clothing.

LineyReborn Wed 14-Sep-16 16:00:56

Mother or MiL?

Bananalanacake Wed 14-Sep-16 16:09:03

When you know you're going to see her wear the same (outer) clothes every day for a month and see what she says.

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Wed 14-Sep-16 16:12:09

I'd do what Pictish said.

Spice22 Wed 14-Sep-16 16:20:26

Ignore, ignore, ignore. It's not always easy to tell some relatives to mind their own business. So either ignore, or make a joke. The joking can get tiring so just ignore like u didn't hear them.

I have a friend who comments on anything I buy and how expensive it is

MrsSeanBean Wed 14-Sep-16 17:15:29

Depending on how old the relative, it could be a generational/ deprivation type issue. My grandparents had conparitively little, and the abundance of choice nowadays both with clothes and food etc was something very alien to them. What I mean, I think, is that while I can see this is annoying, it might not be said out of deliberate malice.

user1471462362 Wed 14-Sep-16 20:56:00

My grandmother was the same, drove us all mad. Does she also comment on your hair and make up? I reckon disengaging with the comments is the best bet.

burnishedsilver Wed 14-Sep-16 21:05:33

She has got problems. Most likely her comments are to do with something about her and aren't really about you and your clothes at all. Presumably she's not very happy within herself if she feel she needs to keep bringing you down. Pity is probably a more appropriate reaction than annoyance. Thats easier said than done, of course.

MrsLogicFromViz Wed 14-Sep-16 21:50:23

People often do that to me. I run away from such people now, thus fully utilising my swishy Nike trainers.

neveradullmoment99 Wed 14-Sep-16 21:54:36

Yes, my mum.
Its annoying but she knows i don't like it.
I went through a phase of friends making comments. I avoided putting on new things when they were around and tended to wear something they had seen. Sad but true.

RunRabbitRunRabbit Wed 14-Sep-16 22:28:03

pictish has the answer. Do that.

Laughter is good too. After pictish's approach, take the piss out of her comments.

Mygoodgod Wed 14-Sep-16 23:18:52

I have a friend who whenever we meet will say oh god your so over dressed ..(jeans and ankle boots) so now I go like a tramp to avoid the over dressed comments

Nettletheelf Thu 15-Sep-16 06:35:54

All of this is a variant on "oh, you're very glamorous, aren't you?", which is the office version of your relative's, "what, ANOTHER new top, how can you afford it?"

It translates to,"I resent you for looking better than me so I'll just try to bring you down a peg or two".

I endorse Pictish's advice!

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