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I cried in the changing room today :(

(68 Posts)
TwentyOneGuns Sat 16-Jul-16 17:02:11

We're going on our first abroad holiday in about 15 years soon so DD14 and I went clothes shopping today. I came back with a pair of jeans.

I am fairly comfy with how I look clothed, I know what suits me and what I like. But I hadn't realised how really really bad I'd look in a swimming costume or holiday clothes.

I'm a14-16, have recently lost a stone on WW and hoping for a bit more before we go. Have also been following all the tips - loads of fruit, veg and water, fitting in some exercise, moisturising, looking after my skin. But it's apparently made bugger all difference as I look fat, saggy and a complete mess. Trying to find a flattering swimming costume for FF boobs seems to be impossible unless you spend £££ - why is it all so hard?

I've got 5 weeks till we go and right now I feel like cancelling which is not an option. I know there's always someone who looks worse but I wanted to feel good and enjoy my holiday, now I just feel I will be an embarrassment to DH and my DD (who doesn't help by looking stunning in everything) when I step on to the beach looking like a sad middle aged Mum sad.

deutschland83 Sat 16-Jul-16 17:26:56

Twentyoneguns do not ever cry flowers well done on the superb weight lose. You are brilliant.

I got this years swimming costumes in asda and I got loads of compliments. Tummy panels, adjustable bra straps (I'm an E cup) and loads of coverage.

About £12 each.

Get thee to an asda and don't ever cry, life's too short xxxx

glenthebattleostrich Sat 16-Jul-16 17:29:13

You could try 30 day shred. It really firms up my arms, legs and back.

2ManySweets Sat 16-Jul-16 17:31:50

I hear you on this. Big time.

May I tentatively suggest the total removal of all sweeties, biscuits, cake from your diet? Ditto any white carb like pasta or bread.

I did this for 4w and it flattened my tummy and I shed about 4.5kg. My weight skyrocketed after I stopped BFing and my self confidence crashed. My "breakdown" came during my holiday. I looked like someone stuck my head onto a "fat persons" body. Nope. It was all me. All 80kg.

It's hard but you can do it. Being strict is key. And never underestimate how filling a good omelette is x

TSSDNCOP Sat 16-Jul-16 17:32:55

OP have a look at the Freya bikinis, they've also got some in sale. I have several and while they are pricey they look great. Proper bra fitting. I'd rather have one top and a couple of pairs of bottoms from there than a tonne of cheaper ones.

2ManySweets Sat 16-Jul-16 17:32:59

FYI; I'm preggers again so back to being bloated as s* and munching cheap Warburton white loaves like they're going out of fashion (wobbles gut).

BananaChew Sat 16-Jul-16 17:39:35

Tankinis tend to be very flattering. Don't cry flowers but yourself a lovely throw over thing (next had some nice ones), some lovely sandals and only take them off when you are swimming, if it helps you feel more confident.

2ManySweets Sat 16-Jul-16 17:41:18

Yes! Throwover things with a v-neck are lifesavers. Try M&S too.

And don't cry she says hypocritically after spending most of May in tears about physique or lack of

HumphreyCobblers Sat 16-Jul-16 17:41:39

Changing room mirrors are GRIM. Unflattering lighting makes everything worse.
Order some costumes and try them on at home.

UsernameTaken2 Sat 16-Jul-16 17:48:10

Kaftans are my best friend when I'm on holiday and a rather large towel to get to and from the pool as I don't wear my kaftans In the water.

Also your daughter is bound to look fabulous, she has youth and the fact she hasn't had any children on her side

QueenLaBeefah Sat 16-Jul-16 17:52:22

Nobody looks good in changing room mirrors. It's the lighting.

You've done really well to lose a stone. flowers

Kittyrobin Sat 16-Jul-16 17:56:53

I went holiday shopping today too, couldn't believe how fat I've gotten. We are going away with in laws, size 8 tiny things. I'm huge 😢
Well done with your weight loss and you've still got 5 weeks to go. You should be proud of yourself!

ConkersDontScareSpiders Sat 16-Jul-16 17:59:03

I look awful in all changing room mirrors these days.i recently lost 3/4's of a stone and was excited as am finally back to the weight I was pre kids, 10 years ago. Was looking forward to going shopping.nope. Looked just as rubbish as I did before! It's they way they are designed.
To make matters worse I am going on holiday with a very skinny friend and her kids. I am eating nowt but salad and fish/white meat, and eggs for breakfast at the moment-it seems to be working a bit, but in desperate for a pint of cider-which might be my downfall!

Mymouthgetsmeintrouble Sat 16-Jul-16 18:03:45

I am fatter than you , i wear skirty swimsuits , knee length shorts , summery skirts and dresses (i find knee length fitted at the waist more flattering as im short so maxi dresses swamp me) floaty sleeveless or short sleeve tops i think the more you try and hide away your figure the more unflattering it looks , just go for well cut basics and im sure you will look wonderfully summery

CoolCarrie Sat 16-Jul-16 18:07:17

I think alot of us know how you feel, please don't cry.
You still have time to continue to lose the pounds, you have done so well, keep going! Other posters have made good points, get yourself a pedicure and manicure before you go as that will give you a wee boost and maybe try St Topaz tanning stuff that you can use it the shower.
Our bodies have carried another life, so that makes us amazing, imho!

specialsubject Sat 16-Jul-16 18:08:51

please don't cry.

no-one will be looking or care, so follow their example. And set that example for your daughter. Competition over appearance is...wrong.

That said, skirted swimsuits will give you an arse the size of the proverbial small country. Boardshorts and bikini top/tankini top suit everyone, and work for swimming. Chuck a rash vest on top for sun protection when swimming.

enjoy your holiday!

neonrainbow Sat 16-Jul-16 18:12:32

I've been there too. Well done on your weight loss. Please don't compare yourself to your daughter, i expect you look a lot better than you think. You just need to find a costume you like. I avoid black or dark colours as they can look worse. Get a nice bright colour that flatters your hair or skin tone and buy some kaftans if you like them.

neonrainbow Sat 16-Jul-16 18:14:09

If you're an hourglass shape especially, don't avoid bikinis. They can sometimes look better than a one piece and a good supportive one with decent sized bottoms could look stunning.

junebirthdaygirl Sat 16-Jul-16 18:21:12

I am not long back from holidays and when you get there you don't actually care. Its so lovely to be in the sunshine to have no housework to be turning those white legs a bit less pale that you won't give a dam. Also believe me you will see all shapes and you will think good for them. Get colours that suit you. Not much just a few nice things. Take your book, lie back and chill and you will feel great.

JulesJules Sat 16-Jul-16 18:22:25

Well done on your weight loss so far flowers

14-16 isn't that big - I'm sure you don't look as big as you think, and you still have 5 weeks - you could lose a few pounds by then, bit of fake tan and a well fitting top and you will look fab.

Bravissimo is brilliant for bikini and tankini tops in proper bra sizes - they go up to J and K cup sizes. I know they are £££, but you could get a top from there and get some cheaper bottoms, eg some swimming shorts bottoms (bit more coverage if you want it) from Amazon, plus a kaftan type thing to throw over. They had some really smart looking crochet kaftan things in Asda.

Ditsy4 Sat 16-Jul-16 18:27:21

Do what I do make DD walk in front of you about a metre no one notices they are looking at DD. Just trying to lighten the mood. Fantastic weight loss. I am heavier definitely a 16.
I bought a swimsuit from Debenhams a few years ago. It crosses over boobs and has a tummy panel which is slightly rucked across my Buddha belly ( CS) and I paid about £35-38 it is really comfy and looks ok better than others I tried. The personal shopper found it for me. Worth a try perhaps.

Littleelffriend Sat 16-Jul-16 18:29:34

I just cried thinking about you crying. Please be kinder to yourself x

NedStarksHead Sat 16-Jul-16 18:31:56

I was with you 100% until you said "I know there's always someone who looks worse"

Wrong attitude, and it's that kind of mentality that has you crying at your image. Nobody should have to look worse than anyone, we are all different and we are all happy at different levels.

Chin up, but steer away from that mentality that 'there's always someone uglier' cause it's what got us here in the first place! flowers

CelticPromise Sat 16-Jul-16 18:34:40 for swimwear. Bravissimo brands at better prices and free returns so you can try on in the comfort of your home.

needastrongone Sat 16-Jul-16 18:39:07

I promise that changing room mirrors are designed to make you feel absolutely SHITE.

Keep on with what you are doing. It will work. Promise. Long term. A toned size 14 looks much better than a flabby size 8.

I did the same thing as you last week and tried stuff on. I am that flabby size 8. I bought 4 pairs of shoes instead on my holiday clothes grin

I have taken it as a kick up the arse to move said arse and have run 4 times this week and stopped eating crap.

Omelettes are indeed amazingly filling, with a salad.

Bravissimo have a sale at present. DD is large of boob, we got her 2 lovely bikinis there last year. They have super costumes too. They were kind, helpful and discreet too.

OP, there's so much pressure to have an amazing figure and look fabulous. But your body has been amazing, it's had DC smile

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