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Do you 'dress for your size/shape' or wear what you like?

35 replies

witsender · 12/07/2016 20:50

I ask because I wear styles that I like, think I look cool, then catch a glimpse in a shop window and realise the the Hush style girlfriend jeans and sloppy jumper that look cool on a size 8 look a bit frumpy on a size 16.

But then think to myself that if I like the clothes, like how they look together, then maybe I am looking at myself with a more critical eye than others would.

According to my DH and friends I always look stylish and well put together, and am aware that at a 16 I am not as slim as I could be but equally I know I am not a heffalump either!

This just got me pondering really (I do overthink a wee bit) about whether I should be moderating my style somewhat or if actually people can look at clothes and think they go well together even on bigger than a size 10.

If that makes sense! Grin

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phoolani · 13/07/2016 00:37

A bit of both. I know what suits me and what doesn't but I have several things that I just love even though I know they don't particularly suit and I love wearing them.

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Wombat87 · 13/07/2016 01:19

I'm like a curvy slim - averaging a size 10 but def bigger on the bottom half and tummy area at the moment. I wear clothes I like but complement my shape, so tops with tight sleeves and across the chest but loose and flowy around the middle. But I'm someone who's not confident in carrying my extra weight, some people are and embrace it so it's down to the individual I guess. Power to you if you think it doesn't look right but you really like it so wear it anyway.

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AmberNectarine · 13/07/2016 07:04

Yes, sometimes - i like midi skirts and dresses but have had to accept that unless they are very slim fitting, they drown me.

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Floisme · 13/07/2016 07:54

A bit of both. I sometimes dress for an image I have of myself - which is a kind of 60 year old Sofia Coppola only with colour. I know I don't have that body really but who cares, it's only dressing up.

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Thefitfatty · 13/07/2016 07:57

Nope, probably never have, don't care. I wear what I feel is comfortable and/or professional and/or sexy (depending on the circumstances).

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Trills · 13/07/2016 07:58

There's a lot of overlap.

The things that I "like" are the things that make me think I look good, which are the things that I feel work well on my shape.

Not necessarily the things that Trinny and Susanna would think worked well on my shape though.

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AmberNectarine · 13/07/2016 08:27

Agree with that Trills - i look my best in little bodycon dresses - luckily these are also my favourite things to wear.

Loose Cos type numbers make me look like I'm wearing my dad's t-shirt, but fortunately that sort of thing isn't my style anyway!

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Floisme · 13/07/2016 08:42

I still have a soft spot for Trinny and Susanna and they were a revelation to me at the time. But they were only interested in body shape whereas I now think personality and your own image of yourself are important too.

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ilovecherries · 13/07/2016 09:49

I've been thinking about this a lot recently. At the moment, I'm fat. I wasn't always, but for now, I am. At the risk of sounding a bit woo woo, I realised I could choose to hate my body, cover it in a black tent and have endless clothing angst, or I could say that my body is great because it represents the fact I've survived some serious shit over the last couple of years. I don't always manage it, but I'm aiming for the latter! So then I have to think about how to dress this body that I don't really 'get' yet. I read all the rules about plus size dressing, and thought WTAF? No matter how 'figure skimming' the outfit, it won't hide the fact I'm fat. It's right there for people to see. So the question became 'am I concerned because I want to look nice for me, or to be less offensive to other people?' That's now what I try and ask myself when I'm breaking one of the 'rules for plus size dressing'. I still wobble a bit sometimes - yesterday I was feeling very vulnerable about how I look just now - but today I'm rocking a Breton top and feeling happy, even though it probably is breaking about 3 'must never' rules. Two people have told me slready that I'm looking nice today - and I don't think it's really about what I'm wearing. It's because I'm standing tall, feeling unapologetic about the space I'm occupying, and smiling. It's not about the horizontal stripes!

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witsender · 13/07/2016 09:51

I feel the same Cherry. I could chose to wear what I should wear, but you would still be able to see my size, or wear what I like and what feels like me. I feel like me in what I wear now I think.

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FinnegansCake · 13/07/2016 09:55

Cherries is spot on, it's a matter of confidence.

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ilovecherries · 13/07/2016 10:03

I've been reading a lot of plus size blogs recently, to try and get an idea about clothing possibilities/stockists etc. While most of them are written by women half my age (I'm 55), and a lot of them have a bit of a thing for 50's dresses, which don't ever be me, what has really impressed me is their body positive approach. I've learned a lot from them, (even though I won't ever wear a vintage dress!!)

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SuperFlyHigh · 13/07/2016 10:06

Right now I am liking mid calf or below calf length printed pleated skirts (chiffon type material), I'm a 12-14 but like the look and they're cool.

I won't wear and tried on yesterday in H&M jumpsuits that are mid calf, wide leg but obviously accentuate the fatter area - totally unflattering on me, but otherwise yes I wear what I want within reason.

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JaceLancs · 13/07/2016 10:12

I try to dress for my shape and size - hourglass currently size 16 although hoping to reduce that
Tend to wear classic fairly plain things, although more adventurous with dresses
I love bright colours though, and know what suits me eg I have a variety of Jewel coloured cashmere cardigans which I wear with white t shirt n jeans or with black trousers, plain dress etc for work

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charliethebear · 13/07/2016 10:18

I mostly wear what I like, some things I know look terrible on me, like bodycon dresses, and I don't wear them, but thats mostly because I'm pear shaped so they just don't fit both around my waist and arse.
I dont dress to flatter my shape or wear things that I dont like even if I know they would probably really suit my body. I think I have a certain style and i dress to that and in my head I look great so then I have confidence. If I see photos I realise I dont look that good but I think I look stylish?

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Thefitfatty · 13/07/2016 10:21

I'm with you cherries. I spent the last 4 years wearing maxi dresses because I thought I looked fat in everything I wore. Finally decided to stop thinking of myself as fat and started wearing what I want and what I feel comfortable in and it's been really great. :)

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NattyGolfJerkin · 13/07/2016 10:43

Like most people, I wear what I think works best with my shape/colouring/personality/whatever I'm doing. That's fine if those things are in fashion but is a pain in the bum if not. I won't buy an item just because it is the cut/colour whatever to be seen in, it needs to work with me, so finding stuff when the wrong shapes/colours/lengths are in season is a real ballache.

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ZootSuit · 13/07/2016 11:21

superflyhigh where are you getting those style skirts from? I love the look and am also a size 12/14 but worried at 5'2" they might look silly on me. Would like to go and try on somewhere though!

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70isaLimitNotaTarget · 13/07/2016 11:37

I always hide what I don't want to show off (unless I'm sunbathing on holiday when I'll be in a swimsuit/bikini but so is everyone else)

My waist/middle is my downfall.
I like the bit above, the bit below.
Nobody wants to see my saggy middleaged belly.
I'm mid height (5'5" mid size (14 top/12 bottom) so I don't need to think "Am I too tall, too short, too big, too small" just too muffin top. But , it's a Work In Progress.

There are very very few 'In Fashion/Must Buy' that I think "Oh, I need that"

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Eminybob · 13/07/2016 11:38

I definitely lack confidence to wear what I really want to. I am carrying a lot more weight than I used to, especially around my stomach and boobs, and do dress to cover myself up rather than just choosing something that I really like. So end up in tent like dresses and tops.

I have a friend who is bigger than me but wears gorgeous dresses, that although do cling, always flatter and she looks amazing. It's the confidence definitely.

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SuperFlyHigh · 13/07/2016 11:39

ZootSuit

These are ones from &otherstories - I have the darker colour and I wear it with a navy vest top. have to get largest size (42).

www.stories.com/gb/Ready-to-wear/Skirts/Shinjuku_Pleated_Mid_Skirt/590576-117331876.1

I also got this Whistles skirt from Ebay - get loads of compliments on it and wear with black vest top - the tops I wear aren't spagetti strap ones or low cut as I have norks (larger breasts!). In fact someone thought my &otherstories vest and skirt combo today was a dress, as I tuck in. I also accessorize with the colours, so navy earrings (small) and red beaded bracelet.

uk.pinterest.com/pin/371758144212902936/

PS - I'm 5 ft 4 and they look fine on me so should look fine on you too, just try. Maybe a heel if you want to be elegant or feel that way with them.

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FlamingoFling · 13/07/2016 11:46

I'm conscious of my shape - probably because I'm a lot bigger than I have been and so do do a lot of dressing to flatter.

For example I love a high waisted, full midi skirt with t shirt but look absolutely horrific so steer well clear

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Diddlydokey · 13/07/2016 11:51

Yes and no. I have huge arms that are disproportionate to the rest of me but I refuse to wear long sleeved tops year round. I see women wearing cardigans at the gym and presume it is the same issue but I can't be THAT bothered by it.

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maggiethemagpie · 13/07/2016 13:13

I'm an apple. I wear anything that doesn't require a waistline, so it won't dig in to what I refer to as my 'podge'

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CatherineDeB · 13/07/2016 13:17

I often wear any old stuff thrown together. I do try to buy or make stuff for with my shape in mind though.

I had a wake up call earlier. I finished making a dress and tried it on - didn't recognise myself Grin. Which is good I suppose ..... with not so good elements. Imagine if I wore clothes that were that flattering every day Shock.

Pear shape here.

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