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Need an outfit for a wedding, plus size and struggling

(55 Posts)
NaraDeer Wed 08-Jun-16 15:06:30

I'm the biggest I've ever been and I'm really struggling trying to find something nice for a wedding I'm going to next month.
I need to cover my arms to past my elbows and I really don't think I'd be comfortable with even my calves being on show now. I have small boobs and very big waist and stomach.
So basically, I have no redeeming features to show off and I need something that will look half decent whilst I hide my entire body but at the same time I want something that won't be too hot in the July weather.

Any suggestions or shall I just go hide away forever now? sad

WiseToTheLies Wed 08-Jun-16 15:13:39

flowers you sound very down. Can you pamper yourself a little maybe to make yourself feel a bit better?

I know it's horrible to have extra weight in the hot weather isn't it.

First of all, how tall are you, how old are you and what's your colouring like (hair, eyes, skin tone)?

NaraDeer Wed 08-Jun-16 15:22:52

I'm a carer for my elderly DM, have 2 year old with suspected learning difficulties and a puppy. I'm lucky if I get to shower and wash my hair grin
But thank you, it's sweet of you to think of that. Maybe a day closer to it I could ask DH for a day off to pamper myself. What do you actually do to pamper yourself?!

I'm 5"6, 29 years old, hair needs doing desperately is an almost washed out semi dye of plum with medium brown roots blush, very pale skin with ruddy cheeks and nose (so I tend to stay away from pinks/reds), blue eyes.

TheRollingCrone Wed 08-Jun-16 15:23:06

ASOS have lovely clothes in larger sizes, have you had a look there?

NaraDeer Wed 08-Jun-16 15:24:10

I'm not sure about being warm/cool or summer/winter though. I've tried to work it out but I'm rubbish at this sort of thing blush

Oh and thank you for taking the time to help!

nam207 Wed 08-Jun-16 15:26:26

What about a pretty 3/4 sleeve wrap top and some trousers?

NaraDeer Wed 08-Jun-16 15:28:11

I agree ASOS do some lovely things, but I haven't spotted anything that doesn't leave arms and/or legs on show.

Ooh that sounds nice nam, I'll have a Google and see if I can find some!

rosie1959 Wed 08-Jun-16 15:28:57

Have you looked at Studio 8 I am only assuming you are size 16 plus as you are worried about your weight

NaraDeer Wed 08-Jun-16 15:29:40

By the way, do you think trousers at weddings is ok? I don't think I've even seen anything except skirts and dresses and don't know if trousers will make me stick out more than being brave and wearing a midi or full length skirt/dress.

lalafala Wed 08-Jun-16 15:30:37

Try lindy bop. I got a lovely dress there last year which was really reasonably priced but unusual and got lots of compliments. Loads of their dresses work really well for larger womwn

HedgeSchool Wed 08-Jun-16 15:54:47

What about a formal-ish jumpsuit? I got a lovely one from Phase Eight (Phase 8?) earlier this year. You could wear it with a bright cardigan or little jacket. I wore it with a jewelled, embroidered jacket, but that was for an evening thing earlier in the year and probably too heavy for a summer wedding.

WiseToTheLies Wed 08-Jun-16 15:57:29

If you're 5'6" then you could get away with a 'fitted' maxi dress (not a billowy one). One that has a band under your bust would be really flattering, then for the church/service, you could wear a cropped, cotton jacket with three quarter sleeves/ short sleeves.

you sound like you have cool colouring so you'll either suit very bright (gem) colours or faded colours (pastels). have you tried Monsoon?

therootoftheroot Wed 08-Jun-16 15:59:33

what size are you?
that will make a difference as to what will look good

marcopront Wed 08-Jun-16 16:18:57

Have you tried yours I got a lovely dress from there for a wedding at Christmas.

Maybe something like this

http://www.yoursclothing.co.uk/scarlett-jo-black-red-poppy-print-wrap-front-maxi-dress-p

NaraDeer Wed 08-Jun-16 16:22:07

I haven't heard of Studio 8 before, there's some beautiful dresses and skirts but they're mainly knee length. The couple of full length ones, are quite bright blush

I've spent a long time looking at Lindy Bop, trying to talk myself into one of the swing (I think) style dresses, but again they're all knee height and I think I'll look awful with my calves out, plus I'm crap at walking in heels and I'd look stupid in a beautiful dress with rubbish flats.

I'd really like a jumpsuit but I worry it will really focus on my stomach, I'm trying to find one that looks like it would be somewhat flattering.

Sorry I thought I'd put in op, I'm a 20.

NaraDeer Wed 08-Jun-16 16:29:45

Ooh that's nice marco. Not too dark for a wedding? I always thought black was a no no but I'd be very happy to be wrong!

mouldycheesefan Wed 08-Jun-16 16:33:39

Get a spray tan. You will feel a lot more confident and clothes will look better! Get your hair done too.

KP86 Wed 08-Jun-16 16:35:30

A jumpsuit with heels and a blazer would be awesome.

Definitely check out asos, I bought one from the clearance section yesterday which is now sold out. But they've got soooo much pretty formal stuff in the outlet bit at the moment.

Remember that you can always put a light cardi over the top if you are worried about arms.

Also, (and don't take this the wrong way), chances of anyone noticing how you look, beyond whether you've done your hair and make up nicely and have a big smile on your face, are slim to none. Nobody will be checking how toned your arms are. We all have our own hang ups and people will be stressed about themselves rather than judging you!

Have fun at the wedding.

lalafala Wed 08-Jun-16 16:43:50

I've worn black to a wedding before when I wasn't feeling confident enough for a bright dress. I wore a peach jacket and fascinator and that made it much summery and perfect for a wedding! You could get your colour through accessories?

marcopront Wed 08-Jun-16 16:45:01

I think just black is a no but I think with the red it would be OK. This is what I wore. I hate showing my arms, so wore a cardigan but it was December.
I like yours because they have a easy return system but they also have shops.

http://www.yoursclothing.co.uk/purple-gypsy-style-maxi-dress-p

umizoomi Wed 08-Jun-16 16:45:36

If you are liking yours OP there might be a store near you if you are near a big shopping centre - Meadowhall in Sheffield have one so I suspect other malls will too

LadyPenelope68 Wed 08-Jun-16 16:45:59

I wore that poppy dress to a wedding recently and felt really good in it. Personally I don't think it's too dark for a wedding at all.

Queenmarigold Wed 08-Jun-16 16:46:14

have you tried fatlotsheknows.co.uk - she runs a business selling plus size clothing

FannyFifer Wed 08-Jun-16 16:52:06

I am a size 20 and got a fab dress from Scarlett & Jo. (Actually had to go down a size)
The site lets you see what the outfits look like on various sized women which I found really good.
It's a mid length dress I got, so between knee & ankle, I'll need a pashmina to hide my arms but there was other dresses with longer sleeves that you might like.

NaraDeer Wed 08-Jun-16 16:52:42

I've never had a tan in my life mouldy, are they all the same? I've got very dry skin and am quite sensitive so I've avoided getting one done for fear of it going badly wrong/having a reaction! Getting hair done sounds good though.

Jumpsuit, heels and blazer sounds great KP, I'd love to find a flattering one. Think I might narrow the search down to trying to find that.
And of course you're right, no one will look or care as long as I make an effort and the logical part of me knows this. My anxiety is quite bad right now and apart from running chores or places for DD, I don't go out at all so this wedding feels like a huge deal to me at the moment.

Thank you everyone for all the advice and suggestions flowers. I don't feel so hopeless now.
I'll have a look for a local Yours.
The poppy dress is going to be bookmarked as a possibility if I have no luck with a jumpsuit.

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