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Help me find a (remotely) comfortable bra!

(28 Posts)
redgeraniumsarebest Thu 12-May-16 14:31:46

World of Mumsnet, please help me! I have large, sagging breasts and every bra I try is either extremely uncomfortable or downright painful. I'm sick of it. Can anyone please recommend to me a bra they may have found which doesn't make them miserable?

Cakescakescakes Thu 12-May-16 14:34:56

The full cup underwired 'sumptuously soft' ones from M&S are the comfiest bras I've ever owned. They come up quite big on the band (eg I'm a 30 band when I'm normally a 32 in other bras).

Cakescakescakes Thu 12-May-16 14:35:33

They're like tshirt bra material.

georgiatraher Thu 12-May-16 14:36:14

Victoria Secret has changed my life. Expensive but comfort like I've never known

First up, sizing. Check out the better bra campaign blog for fitting info- hopefully someone can link. If you can measure as described there and post measurements then that will give us a start point.

There isn't really a universally good bra as it depends so much on breast shape and size

MadSprocker Thu 12-May-16 16:23:54

Triumph bras are great for my 32f's.

Majorlyscared1993 Thu 12-May-16 16:27:33

I always get sized at boux avenue and usually get bras there as most places don't do over a DD (secretly bitter)

SpoonfulOfJam Thu 12-May-16 16:38:49

I buy from bravissimo and have recently discovered Anita for nursing bras.

Well fitting is the key, and I do use bra extenders as I gained an inch or so during pregnancy. They really help with comfort.

SalmonMaki Thu 12-May-16 16:47:02

If you have a fitting appointment at John Lewis, they guarantee the bra fitted will be right - so if you buy and take home and it's not comfy, I believe they'll change it for you. They're the only fitters I go to these days (not in London and don't have the income for Rigby & Peller any more) and they've been great for me. I didn't like my fitting at Bravissimo.

I almost only ever wear Fantasie bras.

MrsMushrooms Thu 12-May-16 17:00:23

I'd check out /r/ABraThatFits for some great tips on getting the right size and fit for you. Loads of really helpful info on there so maybe get a cuppa and start at the beginning! I've found it really helpful

CelticPromise Thu 12-May-16 17:04:11

Most high street shops couldn't fit a bra to save their lives.

redgeraniumsarebest Thu 12-May-16 18:24:08

Lovely, Cakescakescakes, thank you. The product name sounds very promising!

redgeraniumsarebest Thu 12-May-16 19:27:21

Thank you everyone - some great suggestions including options I haven't explored before. I've spent so many years and so much money (like so many of us, I think) on a never-ending quest to find a bra that creates a reasonable shape and doesn't hurt me after half an hour's wear. So many bras seem a good fit initially but after a short time begin to feel like a torture device.
The sagging boob shape, I feel, means that the breasts themselves are actually shaped quite differently from the shape of a bra cup. An underwire will sit in the correct position when trying on a bra and the breasts are positioned in a certain way inside the cups. But as soon as you start to move, the weight of the boobs trying to get back to their natural position seems to force the underwire further down the rib cage, digging in and rubbing quite painfully.
I'd love to hear from anyone who has any idea what I mean! It's very difficult to describe.

Majorlyscared1993 Thu 12-May-16 19:37:35

Red I have exactly the same thing, to be honest now for most days unless it's a special occasion I just use 'comfort bras' that I got online for when I was pregnant... Haven't looked back. Have quite a big chest so if I'm going out I wear 2 but you even get a nice cleavage and the best thing is no bulges where normal bras dig in! I sound like such an advert... I don't know the brand or anything but I get them off e bay or Amazon normally.

AnnieOnnieMouse Thu 12-May-16 19:55:53

I am just the same, red. Also, I'm short and high busted, so most bras come so high up my chest that they chafe the front of my arms once I lean forwards and try to do something.

Equiem89 Thu 12-May-16 19:57:54

I love Freya deco bras. I'm a 30FF.
Have you measured yourself?

That sounds to me like your breasts are bottom heavy and you are getting what is known as "orange in a glass" effect - like this

That can be a size issue but it's mostly a style issue, some bras are far more friendly to that breast shape than others.

CelticPromise Thu 12-May-16 20:03:23

I would start with the size, so many are in the wrong size. And I think there are a few suggestions on that better bra blog for bras for differently shaped boobs.

To clarify - you still need the right size, but even if it's theoretically the right size you might still get that issue on a lot of bras because they're designed for a breast shape where there is more volume at the top and less at the bottom so your breasts can't get to the bottom of the wire properly (or can't stay there)

SauvignonPlonker Thu 12-May-16 20:08:36

I'm a 34FF & short too. Fantasie Bras are the best fit I've ever had (Freya seem to ride up my back, even after being fitted properly). I love the Moulded Balconette seamless t- shirt bra, gives support whilst being very comfortable, doesn't flatten shape. Comes in black & nude only.

redgeraniumsarebest Thu 12-May-16 21:43:02

Again, thank you all for your comments and suggestions. I've had a brief look at the links you have all suggested and I'm looking forward to going back to them all to read more thoroughly.
Yes, StatisticallyChallenged - that (image) is it! You can see how there's wrinkled fabric between the bottom of the breasts and the wire. The breasts don't "fill" into the bottom of the cups, rather, they feel like they're just propped onto the cups with all the weight of them just forcing the wire into the body.
Thank you everyone - I feel there may be hope yet!

Yup that's classic orange in a glass. It happens either because your boobs have more volume at the bottom than the bra is designed to handle or because the roots of your breasts are wider than the wires - either way it forces the wire down. Try to have a look and work out if it's just too much tit (arf) or if the wires are cutting in to breast at the side as that will impact what direction to go in to find a better bra.

If you can check that and measure as described on the blog we'll hopefully be able to get you sorted

redgeraniumsarebest Fri 13-May-16 09:31:55

Wonderful, StatisticallyChallenged - I will do. Thank you.

redgeraniumsarebest Fri 13-May-16 18:53:10

StatisticallyChallenged, I've sent you a Mumsnet PM, so as not to bore everyone with my challenging statistics smile.

MrsMushrooms Fri 13-May-16 19:04:34

I went to Bravissimo today to adjust my size (old bras not working for me!) and wanted to resist the fitters as bra fitters are normally neither use nor ornament, but it was a really great & helpful experience with no pressure to buy. I'd give them a go if I were you!! I'm wide set, wide-rooted, splayed, very soft tissue, pendulous, and very fussy about the look... So I'm a nightmare to fit! But still got sorted really helpfully today

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