Dress me for an autumn wedding please, black or grey

(18 Posts)
sky1010 Tue 22-Sep-15 22:48:41

I am going to a wedding at the end of next month, which, despite the season, will involve going outside. Brrrrr.

I have a lovely grey and black ombre faux fur coat that I want to wear and a nice clutch bag and pair of heels in black- but I'm really struggling to find a dress.

This is the only contender so far. I like it, but I'm not mad about it.

www.asos.com/Elise-Ryan/Elise-Ryan-Ruched-Midi-Skater-Dress-With-Plunge-Lace-Bust/Prod/pgeproduct.aspx?iid=5232570&cid=5235&Rf1012=4461&Rf-200=4&Rf-300=2077&sh=0&pge=1&pgesize=36&sort=-1&clr=Black&totalstyles=88&gridsize=3

I just can't find nice black/grey dresses! Everything looks like workwear or something I would wear clubbing. I want something pretty and wedding guesty, but in black or grey.

Can anyone help? Oh I'm 21 and a size 12.

BackforGood Tue 22-Sep-15 23:01:03

I'm not one of the S&B ladies who are experts at finding clothes, but it's not generally the done thing to wear black to a wedding - black is the colour of mourning, so not really the impression you want to give off at a wedding wink

sky1010 Tue 22-Sep-15 23:12:36

I've seen copious amounts of people wearing black dresses at weddings. Assuming you aren't wearing a mourning veil and crying it hasn't been an issue of yet.

travailtotravel Tue 22-Sep-15 23:29:30

I think the real fauxpas is white, tbh. Black is OK these days, honestly. Can you go for an LBD and get a pop of colour any other way?

MissBattleaxe Tue 22-Sep-15 23:35:11

No I agree with BackforGood. I know that people DO wear black to weddings but I don't think they ought to. I'm an old fogey, I know! The coat sounds fabulous though. You could wear black with, as travail says, a pop of colour- a bright scarf or belt or OTT statement necklace?

Millymollymama Wed 23-Sep-15 01:55:49

Black is not pleasant at a wedding and this is an evening style dress. Is the wedding a day service? If so, I think day formal clothes are best. I think an Aubergine/plum coloured dress would be a whole lot better and way more up to date! L K Bennett has a superb one, but it is expensive. You can style it up for evening with god jewellery and a clutch bag. I also think lace does day to evening very well. Lots of grey lace around and also plum colours. Much more classy. Dark green is also popular this autumn. You could also try a pussy bow silk blouse with wide floaty trousers.

Millymollymama Wed 23-Sep-15 01:59:53

If and when my DD's get married, LBD wearers will not be invited! Or at least asked not to wear black on the invitation! Ditto - white. Just not elegant or appropriate. I did mean good jewellery, not god!

DiamondoInTheSky Wed 23-Sep-15 02:09:14

There are hundreds of colours out there so it baffles me why rude guests continue to wear black and white to weddings. confused

Black is traditionally the colour of mourning. Please don't wear it to a wedding. The snippy reply to BackforGood suggests to me that you already know this!

GrandHighWitch Wed 23-Sep-15 02:14:16

Afraid I'm in agreement with not going all black for a wedding - unless it is a black tie evening do, then it is just about passable. IMO a really bold dark colour would look fab with the coat, but the black/grey coat and black dress is on a similar pegging to wearing white to a wedding. If you went for the v lovely maroons that are in all the shops now, then you could get away with opaque black tights too if it was cold. Bear in mind that we have had ridiculously hot Octobers, you might want a back-up plan if it is too hot for fur.
I wore a huge fur coat to a December wedding a couple of years ago with a very fine black lace over gold dress. I was the only one out of nearly 400 guests wearing anything even remotely black blush

Baconyum Wed 23-Sep-15 02:17:44

Any of these any good or give ideas?

www.aleenasboutique.co.uk/dresses/item/494-magneta-deep-v-neck-peplum-midi-dress

www.aleenasboutique.co.uk/dresses/item/446-purple-bodycon-dress

www.aleenasboutique.co.uk/sale/item/436-leaf-print-midi

www.littleblackdress.co.uk/occasion/wedding-guest-dresses/adrianna-berry-midi-dress

www.littleblackdress.co.uk/occasion/wedding-guest-dresses/the-lbd-natalie-in-monochrome

www.littleblackdress.co.uk/occasion/wedding-guest-dresses/gatsbylady-art-deco-flapper-dress-in-grey

www.littleblackdress.co.uk/occasion/wedding-guest-dresses/nancy-mac-kristen-dress-in-reef-and-teal-lace

I think silver/grey would work well with the coat.

Fishlegs Wed 23-Sep-15 10:52:01

I really like the last 2 you linked to Baconyum.

What do you think OP?

Baconyum Wed 23-Sep-15 18:08:36

The Gatsby lady dresses are gorgeous and there's headdresses too

curriegirl Wed 23-Sep-15 18:46:24

Wear what you like and what you are comfortable in. Utterly ridiculous when brides and their mothers try to dictate what guests should wear.

MissBattleaxe Wed 23-Sep-15 20:18:57

curriegirl- it's not the bride and her mother dictating. It's just sort of bad form to wear black at a wedding. I always think it's like you're cursing the wedding or mourning for the bride's future! smile

GrandHighWitch Wed 23-Sep-15 20:30:28

Traditionally black at weddings is a sign of disapproval of the marriage. Younger generations may not be quite so bothered by that but older generations and more traditional types would see it as a slight.

Ridiculous to say no black. I wouldn't do all black, but black and white or black and grey is absolutely fine.

Pretty and pale grey Looks a bit overpriced though.

Too severe?

Pretty but might have bra issues

Too worky?

Would need to see irl but pretty

Baconyum Wed 23-Sep-15 20:42:58

Remus the last 2 links you put would be perfect I think

MissBattleaxe Wed 23-Sep-15 22:59:19

I agree Remus- black with a pattern or something is fine but all black looks like mourning dress not morning dress.*

(*Other puns are available)

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