tired and broke but don't want to look like that anymore!

[GoodGriefCharlieBrown]

I have taken my head out of the sand and realise I need to start making an effort. I had DS 2 years ago and most days I'm so tired I feel sick (I am on iron tablets and am eating healthily and starting to exercise at lunchtimes so am hoping that this improves).
The problem is that, in short, I look how I feel - my hair hasn't been cut for a year and I usually spend approx 2 minutes doing my make up each day in the car once I get to work.
Please can you give me some tips on how to look like I actually value myself?!
HAIR - light brown (with a bit of grey now) and almost straight -I'm having it cut this week into a choppy jaw length bob with a fringe. I have a long face and this tends to suit me as the layers flick out to add a bit of width. I'd like some advice about colour though - any recommendations on home semi-perm colours?
FACE - I could stretch to 5 mins for make up in the morning. Long face, pale with freckles (yellowish tone rather than pink), small features. What would be your top tips to make me look brighter while adding a little colour and definition to the eyes? Budget is very low so I'm not after miracle creams, more make up tips - I hate lipstick though!
Gosh it's a long post - I really do need help!

[Skinheadmermaid]

Well make up wise may I suggest you buy a natural coloured eyeshadow palette. Collection do a good one for £4. Add a light shade of brown all over the eye lid then a darker brown in the crease of your eyelid. Then add a volumizing mascara. You can add liquid eyeliner on the top lid and flick it out but its probably best if you practice at home first so you get used to eyeliner. Don't ever line your water line or underneath lash line if you have small eyes, it just makes them look smaller.
I'm guessing you have a good foundation already and don't have problem skin? Buy a highlighter to add to your cheeks after blush, Topshop have a nice one. I also picked up a decent one in primark of all places for £4. Glow all out by soap and glory is great if it suits your skin tone. Just pat a bit on the apples of your cheeks and upwards, this is most flattering for a long face. You can also add a tiny bit on your brow bone. Sleek Rose gold is a good all round blusher.
I would suggest a bright lipstick but I see you don't like them. Perhaps a tinted lip balm? Lipstick is the easier way to 'lift' a face though.
You can remove all your make up at night with coconut oil if it agrees with you, its cheap and will hydrate your skin.

[goshdarnit]

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/2367993-In-a-total-funk-on-0-budget-how-can-I-make-myself-feel-like-less-of-a-haggard-old-mess
I read this thread the other day, it has some great tips, and restores your faith in humanity!
I cannot link properly, as I'm on my phone, sorry!

[70isaLimitNotaTarget]

Hi

Your hair will feel much better after a trim, you'll lose the dry ends and give it body.
You could ask the stylist about colours (which they'd recommend ) or have a look in Boots or Superdrugs. Are you looking for brightening the light brown or adding copper?
i use Superdrug Permenant but they have semi-permenant (more shades I think) and threy are regularly on special offer.
Do a strand test (and a patch test) they tend to come out darker than you think they will.

Make-up - eyebrows. Gel, pencil, powder .
If you can get them threaded (costs about £5 at one of those 'stands' that are everywhere)

The Sleek Rose Gold is nice but very sparkly. My DD bought the cream blusher trio (I think California) very nice natural shades, blend well and no glitter

Boots No7 foundation match (I'm converted to foundation now )



My tips would be for you :

Eyelash curlers - I've tried all sorts. I have BodyShop which are nice but I'm coveting Shu Umeara

Hot cloth Cleanser - you can try the Superdrug ones or a muslin cloth with any creamy cleanser

Long faces are elegant (I prefer to call mine 'oval' it's a universal 'suits most things' face)

Earrings. Give focus to your face.

[GoodGriefCharlieBrown]

Thanks for your reply. My skin is dry which just adds to the tired look! I'm using no.7 foundation which is ok but think it's slightly too dark so I need to look for another anyway.
I think one of my problems is that I always used to wear really dramatic make up in my 20's but now I'm 41 turquoise eyeshadow just isn't going to work so I need to relearn what suits!
Your point about ignoring the lower lashes is interesting - I tried to make an effort last week and my eyes just looked like they had disappeared! What's the water line though?

[70isaLimitNotaTarget]

Waterline is the inner rim of your eyelid ( so the bit above your lower lashes , and inside if you do the upper ones)

I never use mascara on my lower lashes because mine are longer than the top ones and years ago, DSis said I looked like my eyes were on "upside down" . See how a barbed comment can sting?

I use a coloured soft kohl pencil in the waterline (not right up to the inner corner though) and below to smudge.

Barry M metallics are my favourite , really soft and long lasting.
You need to trawl round Superdrugs they have loads on 3 for 2

If you dyed your eyelashes you could get away with a quick brush of mascara ?

What colour are your eyes?

[GoodGriefCharlieBrown]

Thanks 70 - yes eyebrows!! It's like I've forgotten everything I used to know about make up - they are quite thin but could definitely do with a bit of a shape to lift my eyes.
Not sure about the hair colour - I think I just want to add richness to it so I'm hoping that any colour will be soaked up by the greys which will add a bit of multi-tone (I'd love to have proper colour/high and low lights done but it's too expensive and permanent colours always seem and permanent colours can sometimes look flat so I thought semi might just give it a bit of low maintainence lift.
I'll get a cream blusher - i had one a couple of years ago and loved it. I guess I'm aiming for creaminess rather than matte then to deflect from the knackeredness?!

[Kennington]

Add an illuminator...... I always use now and the you look knackered comments have stopped.
No.7 peach or Dior clow maximiser. Brow bone, cheek bone and lids followed by concealer and a tiny bit of blush. I don't bother with foundation so do sometimes use a little bronzer.
I have the same hair colour as you and a few half head highlights or ombré works well. I do it at home now. Good luck

[GoodGriefCharlieBrown]

My eyes are blue but not intense - more like a slightly faded petrol blue.
My eyelashes are quite thick but short - even without curling a sweep of mascara opens my eyes up. I have similar issue with my lower lashes so I might try ignoring them altogether and see how it looks.
I think DH may think he's married to a 12 year old when I tell him I'm experimenting with make up for the bank hol!

[BoredHorse]

Loreal make up is 3 for 2 in boots at the moment, I use their true match foundation but I've also heard their Infallible one is great.
I recently brought an eye shadow palette from them too, it's lovely natural shades I think it was £9.99. It

[GoodGriefCharlieBrown]

Hi Kennington - which kit do you use at home? Last time I tried highlights with a friend at home we found we missed the first 2 inches so it looked awful!

[avocadotoast]

The water line is the inside of your lower lid. Just above your eyelashes.

I learnt recently about this thing called "tightlining" - it really makes a difference to your face and makes your eyes look that bit more done without any real effort. This is how to do it: thebeautydepartment.com/2012/11/incognito-eye-definition/

I second Sleek blushers, they're great. Apparently their eyebrow palettes are pretty good too.

On days when I can't be arsed with full makeup I tend to go primer, eyebrows, little dab of eyeliner (as above), mascara, blusher. Sometimes a finishing powder too. Bourjois do this really good powder (m.boots.com/h5/cat_hub?unCountry=uk&path=/en/Bourjois-Healthy-Balance-Compact-Powder_1244985/) that acts like a cross between foundation and finishing powder, so it's great for just perking your skin up a bit through the day. (It definitely doesn't last the 10 hours it claims to though!)

[BoredHorse]

Sorry knocked my phone...
The palette was called la palette nude.
I agree a highlighter on your cheekbone, very top of forehead and down the nose bone is nice.
I've started getting into make up more recently and found YouTube has lots of good videos about how to apply it.

[Kennington]

Oh I will have to check
But I Have used loreal ombré kit both for highlights and for doing the ombré thing....getting a friend involved is definitely the way to go although I didn't myself.

[worksallhours]

Some of these might be a bit off the wall ... But I reckon that if you want to look better, you have to take steps to make yourself feel better first.

Get your hair cut. Have your eyebrows threaded. Go to the dentist and have your teeth properly cleaned by the hygienist and then invest in an electric toothbrush if you haven't got one (this might be a touch pricey).

Buy some epsom salts and try to have a weekly bath in them. They are great for upping your magnesium levels and have a tendency to sort out any imbalances in your skin and hair. If you can afford it, book yourself a hand and foot massage.

Think about taking a regular multivitamin and supplementing with vitamin D3. Up your water intake and if you can, try to follow the Wahls protocol as far as possible in terms of veg consumption: so try to go for a cup of colours, brassicas and greens every day.

You say your skin is dry ... well, I have tried every damn moisturiser under the sun from Creme de la mer and Eve Lom to bizarre stuff from Australia and the best moisturiser I have found is traditional blue Nivea cream. Yep, the traditional, thick, white stuff in the blue tub that costs about 70p in B&M bargains. I swear that stuff takes ten years off me. My grandmother has been using it all her life. She is now 90 but looks to be in her mid-70s.

Hope some of these ideas are useful.

[Coastingit]

Why are you so tired? Do you have any childcare or some break during the week? Does your DH do some housework?

Try Bourjois - their healthy mix foundation is great for pale skin, I ise the lightest shade and it's quite yellow toned. I also use Bourjois Happy Light primer which gives a glow. Just those two products, a little eyebrow pencil and a swipe of Clinique stick cream blush and that's my daily sahm look and under 5 mins.

[mewkins]

A few cheap things that are good....

MUA bronzer from superdrug is a quid and in shade 01 is lovely and natural. I think a light dusting of bronzer is really good for taking the tiredness away. Use it on brow, cheeks, nose and chin before blusher.

Cream blusher- maybelline dream mousse or the bourjois one looks good. Sleek blusher is also good.

Eyebrow pencil.. to make eyebrows frame the face use Rimmel as recommended by several beauty editors apparently. Use to lightly shade in any gaps.

If you are not keen on lipstick (I agree) I bought a lovely natural one from L'oreal the other day. Very neutral.

Also Revlon Colourstay quad eyeshadows are nice (buy a neutral one in browns and use lightly). Also the MUA undressed ones are great for £4.

[lucysmam]

Sorry for the hijack, I'm trying to get back into good habits make up/skin/hair wise but could never get eyebrow pencil right. Do any of you know of a good youtube "how to" video that I could have a look at?

[70isaLimitNotaTarget]

lucy I have the World's Scabbiest Eyebrows - it;s Official.

My number one best brow pencil is a QVC product from ybf ( ex Ford model Stacey Schieffilin) , but it's out of stock at the minute. It's soft, a good colour (others are way too dark)
I've got the Benefit Gimme Brow and the Sleek brow kit but they're trickier IMO.

Do you do the measurement from nose-to-outer corner / nose-inner corner / arch above the pupil
Then fill in the gaps?

[lucysmam]

I found a good video to follow for shaping them - they look almost as good as they do when I have them threaded.

It's filling the gappy bits that haven't yet grown back from overplucking for years that I struggle with. I end up looking like I've raided the crayons for a brown one & just coloured in the inner side of them

[mewkins]

Not sure about a tutorial but use the pencil in light feathery strokes to fill your normal shape. Also, slightly blunt the pencil so that it is softer.

[lucysmam]

Thanks mewkins, I'll try it slightly blunter in the morning - usually keep it sharp like my eyeliner but rarely use it because I end up looking wrong

[mrsmeerkat]

It is a little bit pricey but mac factor face finity is brilliant - three in one. Makes you look great with a quick sweep. It's a compact

My friend swears by aldi home dye. Worth doing a patch test to see will it suit you

Brows make such a difference and I love pink eyeshadow and grey liner with a good mascara. Touch of Bronzer. Pink nude lipstick. Pretty stid earrings

Maybelline 7 day nail varnish is fab

[Saurus72]

I would say, as an everyday basic routine:

Foundation/tinted moisturiser
If you can stretch to it (it is Dior, so expensive, however mine has so far lasted 3 months with daily use, and lots left in tube) a brightening primer underneath foundation makes a real difference and 'lifts' your whole look - not essential though

Natural eyeshadow and mascara (after curling your eyelashes if you can be bothered - I can't) . MUA (from Superdrug) do seriously brilliant eyeshadow a for £1 each. The mascara is also £1 - can't pretend it is amazing cos it's not. It is certainly OK though.

Blusher - will brighten your face and make you look healthier. Again, MUA is really not bad at all.

Natural lipgloss/tinted lip balm. I LOVE Korres lip butter in Quince or Coral - not gloopy or sticky. They are on Amazon for about £6, last months and months with daily use and are just gorgeous and brilliant at making you look healthier.

So, investment in the primer (not essential, but brilliant), lip butter little bit of expense but so worth it, and MUA for the rest - a handful of products for about £5. Good luck!

[GoodGriefCharlieBrown]

Sorry I am only just getting back to you all! All the advice is so appreciated - I bought a liquid highlighter today which I tried in the car on the way home and I could see how it really brightened my face by putting it in an arc around the top of my (non-existant) cheekbones up to my brows.
I did feel really self concious asking the girl in Boots how I could look more awake and imagined her thinking "there are limits"!
My brows are actually a decent shape as i used to pluck them but i realised they are quite sparse, so i used a mid brown eyeshadow to lightly shade the brow and it made a real difference by framing my eyes. I already have a pink lip and cheek tint so i used that and also put some on my lips and was pleasantly surprised - it just gave my lips a bit of colour and make them look less dry.
I'm having my hair cut tomorrow so I know that will look better but i need to look into dyes - i'd prefer as natural a one as possible (ingredients i mean) but not sure if they are any good so off to google i go!
As far as why i am so tired it's a very boring reason - 2 yr old with food allergies so cooking has to be highly organised (weekends usually involve lots of batch cooking!), working full time, DH works shifts so we have 4 weekends in 8 without him. I'm lucky in that i like healthy food but i've upped the fruit, veg and plant proteins and am walking every day so i hope i will start to feel better instead of relying on make up to do the job!
Thank you again - once i'm on the laptop i'll read all the tips properly. X

[GoodGriefCharlieBrown]

Oh and DH does all the housework as I do all the cooking so pretty fair split!