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Husband has bought used louboutins

(45 Posts)
elslil79 Thu 25-Dec-14 10:24:21

I know this may sound ungrateful but my husband has bought me a pair of second hand louboutin shoes for Christmas. They are very used, not in original box and the red sole has pretty much worn off! He is very pleased with his eBay bargain and I have faked joy at them, but the thought of wearing someone else's shoes is making me feel slightly sick. I don't want to appear ungrateful but part of me wants him to know I'm not really happy with second hand shoes for Christmas. I'm also a bit embarrassed to show the family when they come around. What would you do?!!

Redtartanshoes Thu 25-Dec-14 10:27:39

I wouldn't be impressed either but if things are generally good in your relationship and they were bought with the best intentions then I would suck it up in the spirit of Christmas. Fake joy and smile graciously. You'll be a better person for it, and seething over it will only spoil your day and possibly end up in a row

Oh and buy yourself something nice in the sales grin

PancakesAndMapleSyrup Thu 25-Dec-14 10:30:44

I love myhusband dearly but have asked and been given the receipts for 3 items i dont like! I cant fake it. I would say something to your DH but mabye tomorrow instead if you are not used to it xx

oswellkettleblack Thu 25-Dec-14 10:31:27

Tell him! FFS. Would you have bought him an item he said he wanted so worn out it's not usable? No? Then why the fuck feign joy when he does it to you? What would I do? Return for refund and go buy myself new ones. And tell him the truth.

divingoffthebalcony Thu 25-Dec-14 10:33:17

Oh that's grim. I wouldn't be happy with that. It's only a bargain if they're in decent condition. They sound battered.

Call me an ingrate, but I wouldn't be able to fake joy at that. Just imagine if he does it again!

oswellkettleblack Thu 25-Dec-14 10:33:35

How is it 'seething' or 'ruining the spirit of Christmas' to just say, 'I am displeased you bought me used shoes so worn out it's embarrassing. I wouldn't do that to you. These need to be returned.'

Fanfeckintastic Thu 25-Dec-14 10:35:39

Definitely be honest! And hide them when family come!

Hurr1cane Thu 25-Dec-14 10:36:53

Aw bless. But it's never a good idea to wear second hand shoes anyway because of people like me who have dodgy feet and wear them in funny blush

But he was trying though. Maybe tell him tomorrow

oswellkettleblack Thu 25-Dec-14 10:38:15

Bless him! For being a cheapskate? C'mon.

MarjorieMelon Thu 25-Dec-14 10:44:43

Generally I'm not bothered by presents but I would not wear second hand shoes. In your shoes (sorry ;) I would just say to him look I don't like the shoes but it's no big deal we can still have a good time. Don't show them to anyone else, I don't show anyone my presents anyway I find it too embarrassing even if I do like them.

elslil79 Thu 25-Dec-14 10:54:40

Thanks all, I just wanted reassurance that I wasn't being ungrateful! I have mentioned to him that I feel a bit funny about wearing used shoes and that they are very very used. He has now hidden them in a cupboard and asked that I don't show anyone! I think he's sulking a bit but I can deal with that far better than the incredulous looks on the faces of our family if they had seen the shoes! Or if he had bought me second hand shoes every year thinking I loved them?! Have a great day everyone and thanks for the advice xx

judydoes Thu 25-Dec-14 10:58:43

I have word second-hand shoes before, as in ones that have been tried on and wouldn't fit so went straight on to second owner.

I wouldn't be happy with 'worn for ages' second hand shoes, either! I'd probably be a wimp, fake it and not wear them though. If they were as described it might be difficult to return them. Tell him they hurt your feet or something or they've been worn in funny so you can't wear them-then he might not do it again.

oswellkettleblack Thu 25-Dec-14 10:59:19

Let him sulk then. It's a shitty thing to do to someone as a Christmas gift. Anyone with a brain cell knows that. He was hoping you'd settle for someone's worn out old shoes. Wow. Would you expect him to be grateful for something similar? If the answer is 'no' then don't put up with it in return.

SingRingPing Thu 25-Dec-14 11:00:14

Glad you told him. Just so you know though, I bought a pair of louboutins for my wedding day and I was surprised at how quickly the red on the sole wore off. I've worn them 3 times and it's nearly all black (just the bit you actually walk on) so they might not be as 'used.' as you think - not that it makes it any better as a Christmas present, but don't feel you can't wear them!

oswellkettleblack Thu 25-Dec-14 11:00:47

Who are all these people who lie to their spouse like that? If you cannot be honest with you spouse or family, who can you be honest with.

FibonacciSeries Thu 25-Dec-14 11:07:35

The problem with used Louboutins is that they've probably molded to the original owner's feet, so they might be very uncomfortable to you. And since they tend to have 10cm heels, it could mean a lot of pain.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 Thu 25-Dec-14 11:11:06

The person may well have advertised them as lightly used. And he may well have paid a lot and thought it was only way to get you Louboutins. No need to hurt his feelings IMO.

Teeb Thu 25-Dec-14 11:15:46

That's a really shitty gift. Like a 'you're not worth the real deal, you're not worth a nice sparkly £20 pair from new look darling, no I got you someone's cast offs before they went in the bin. Merry christmas!'

fanjoforthemammaries7850 Thu 25-Dec-14 11:17:44

It isn't though. It's like he did his best and screwed up.

Apatite1 Thu 25-Dec-14 11:18:50

Oh dear. That's really bad. I'm so sorry.

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 25-Dec-14 11:19:57

I'm usually of the "it's the thought that counts" school of thinking. but you were right to say something. If u can't get things like that new don't bother.

It's thoughtless and if money is an issue he could have got something else. something that shows he cared and at least tried. not manky shoes

Teeb Thu 25-Dec-14 11:20:42

His best is someone else's old shoes? Come on he received the item, so he could have looked at them before handing over. If they weren't in the condition as described the. Hey should have said he was sorry that the item he'd ordered hadn't yet been delivered/had a fault but he'd get something to her by New Years.

Fanfeckintastic Thu 25-Dec-14 11:24:10

That's like something my DP would do. Well meaning but just gets it wrong. One Valentine's when I was pregnant and had arserious craving for
Twister ice pops, I came home from work after a day of seeing people being sent flowers to work, to about twenty huge family boxes of Twisters almost up to the ceiling!! Nice thought I suppose but I'd have really preferred probably anything else!

Bruiserbereftofsoftness Thu 25-Dec-14 11:24:20

That's harsh Teeb it sounds more like I wish I could stretch to brand new but tried too hard.

The O P would be angrier if dh could easily afford new ones and bought used to be cheap.

Sounds like he made effort in the wrong place and focused on getting the brand instead of practical.

Glad you told him OP todays sulk will save years of faking.

Corygal Thu 25-Dec-14 12:29:58

I love second hand but I'd be really hurt about this. For a start, used shoes aren't the same as used anything else, because you can't wash them, and there's something dismaying about getting used, let alone well used, old stuff for Christmas.

It doesn't make you feel very special.

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