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Bra shopping misery...yes, I'm aware I've gained weight. But didn't think bra shopping would be this hard

(57 Posts)
alltoomuchrightnow Tue 25-Nov-14 21:13:36

For most of my 30s I fluctuated between 36 - 38 DD apart from when I lost a load of weight with Lighterlife and was a 36D for a couple of years before I regained the weight
I have a broad back/ shoulders and my bra size doesn't change that much... having lost five stone with LL and getting to a size 10-12 on bottom half (and looking v slim as i'm tall), I was still a top heavy 36D
But anyway...sigh..that was then
I have put weight on in the last couple of years, I need to address that, I will address that, but need a bra for the here and now especially as I have job interviews . Right now, as from very recently, am a 40DD. Just gaining that bit of extra weight backfat has made high street shopping today a nightmare...I had to try as all my 38DDs were cutting in my back

Primark... only one 40DD in the entire (large). Balconette style, which is not my thing, but I snapped it up because it was cheap and I'm out of work.
Went to John Lewis, really thought I'd be able to get something in Freya or Triumph as I've been wearing Triumph for years, never a problem with my normal 38 DD...not a single one. Assistant asked me if I needed help. When I told her the size, she said they didn't stock it because 'we don't do that size. Buyers would never want to buy in that size for us' . I felt like such a fat frump.

So it's not the DD's is it..but being a 40 that's so hard?
Where can I get non frumpy but supportive and not extortionate ones? Guess it's going to have to be online?
Is 40 really that unusual? There are plus size shops and plus size clothing ranges everywhere (and to be honest I'm not entirely at that stage yet, can get away with 16 - 18 in most stores and hope to lose weight. i.e. I'm a 16 bottom half but an 18 top cos of the norks) but I do need a plus size bra...

alltoomuchrightnow Tue 25-Nov-14 21:14:51

wrote that wrong. Only one 40DD bra in the entire large Primark STORE

alltoomuchrightnow Tue 25-Nov-14 21:15:26

and if buyers don't want to buy in that size, then why do they do plus size clothing?? grrrr

Bunbaker Tue 25-Nov-14 21:19:22

I'm sure some of the experts will be along soon, but first of all are you sure you measure 40" under your bust?

OK, first up I'm going to hazard a guess you're looking for the wrong size. It would be extremely unusual to be a 10-12 and a 36 band when fitted properly, but many many shops fit in an outdated way where they add inches to your underbust measurement

Can you grab a tape measure and measure as described in this link please?

ilovepowerhoop Tue 25-Nov-14 21:24:29

I am a size 20 on the top but only have a 36 back size so think its unlikely that you need a 40 back size. What is your under bust measurement?

piggychops Tue 25-Nov-14 21:27:11

leans forward in anticipation of forthcoming revelation

WiIdfire Tue 25-Nov-14 21:28:33

Bravissimo. All the way.

alltoomuchrightnow Tue 25-Nov-14 21:51:44

need to find tape measure! my kitten chewed up my usual one!!!
Statistically when I lost that weight I was a 10-12 bottom (sometimes 8) but on top a lot bigger hence the 36D. My lighter life counseller said i was shaped like a very top heavy carrot (I'm very leggy... like a space hopper on stilts, when I'm slim)!
but .... i only wish i had that problem now.. sigh.. big all over
I assume I'm a 40 because all my 38DD dig in now and it's never the cups.. its under my boobs and on my back where it digs. Cups never get too tight... bra I got today, the cups are quite loose. It's def flubber on my ribs and back ...
The 40DD I tried on in Primark felt ok
I do sometimes buy Pepperberry dresses from store. but is Bravissimo only online?

alltoomuchrightnow Tue 25-Nov-14 21:52:30

oh kittens!! he's chewed it clean in half and only one half remains!! don't know where he's hidden the other half!
got a metal measure to hand... ouch!
will try and find another cloth one

alltoomuchrightnow Tue 25-Nov-14 21:55:15

Ilovepowerhoop, my mother and I have really wide backs /shoulders but she is little and has always been slim. She can never get a bra to fit as she's very broad back and small cup and slim on front. can't remember her size but assistants have actually told her many times, that they can't fit her! (she won't go to anywhere pricey so this would be M&S or BHS)

alltoomuchrightnow Tue 25-Nov-14 21:56:13

so..shall i tie some string round and then measure that on the metal rule?

sandgrown Tue 25-Nov-14 21:56:15

I second Bravissimo for a great choice

alltoomuchrightnow Tue 25-Nov-14 21:57:29

but be honest folks..IS 40 such a rare size? is that really considered, v much plus size? I have put on a lot of weight admittedly. But the JL assistant looked at me like i was a freak to ever expect them to stock 40s

alltoomuchrightnow Tue 25-Nov-14 22:03:56

Oh God this is so weird; am beyond confused.
I've had to measure with string and then make a mark on it and measure that with the metal rule...
but i've done it three times and each time is about 37 inches that is for my under bust. Directly under the boobs (wearing a bra)
How can this be???
because all my 38DD's cut in like buggery
and today i bought Primark 40DD which felt fine. I assumed someone who's an 18 on top and struggling with 38 bras would indeed be about 40 especially after recent weight gain
What do I do?
i know debenhams and M&S are crap for measuring
Please don't say Rigby and Peller etc, am out of work, I have about £35 - £40 max to spend

alltoomuchrightnow Tue 25-Nov-14 22:05:42

yep tried again, 37 inches
so how can a triumph 38 cut in?

alltoomuchrightnow Tue 25-Nov-14 22:07:04

I'm wrong. the bra I'm wearing is an old and saggy Triumph one and it's 40DD. I didnt realise I already had that size. I think i got it for PMS as i recall now..for when boobs get bigger.
so a 40 shouldn't dig in.... and i didnt think bras shrunk but got looser and saggier with wear!

strongandlong Tue 25-Nov-14 22:07:23

I love bra internet ion threads! You'll need a bigger cup size. What's your bust measurement?

strongandlong Tue 25-Nov-14 22:08:38


I thought I was a 40b (thanks m&s!) but it turns out that 36F is a perfect fit!

strongandlong Tue 25-Nov-14 22:10:00

Because your cups are too small, they steal fabric from the band. Try putting the bra on backwards. How does the band feel then?

alltoomuchrightnow Tue 25-Nov-14 22:10:37

i don't know, strong. I can't do it properly with a bit of string. I really need someone to measure me properly...

alltoomuchrightnow Tue 25-Nov-14 22:12:04

Strong, M&S made you as a 36 into a 40??! have i been beating myself up unnecessarily?
I will try what you said . but my cups don't feel too small

alltoomuchrightnow Tue 25-Nov-14 22:12:57

so are you thinking perhaps I need smaller back size and a bigger cup?? this is so confusing!

MerryInthechelseahotel Tue 25-Nov-14 22:14:13

Please go and get measured. I felt like I had had plastic surgery after my fitting and new bra!!

MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig Tue 25-Nov-14 22:14:19

I love the bit in the guide where it says if you're fat then go for a tighter bra so it's got something firm to grip. Yeah, cos I want back boobs too. hmmgrin

(I did actually replace all my bras after trying this method and they do fit a million times better!)

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