Funeral outfit. Not dark or black.

[Judyandherdreamofhorses]

I have nothing vaguely smart or appropriate. I think it needs to be longish length?

I really don't want to buy new shoes. I've got nude wedges.

I know this all sounds very trivial and stupid, but ideas welcome. I'm medium height, slimmish, 37.

It's my dad. We weren't that close. Divorced from my mum and remarried many years ago. Not that that's relevant here.

[domesticslattern]

I wore a black shift dress with a nude jacket. Smart but would fit your bill if you don't want to go too dark, plus would match your wedges. Jigsaw is good for shift dresses, they suit slimmish people and are quite modest.
TBH I found people don't care what you wear so long as the colours are classic not bright and so long as the overall look is smart.
Sorry for your loss, even if you weren't close, funerals aren't much fun.

[Judyandherdreamofhorses]

Thanks, will have a look for something like that. I do have a black blazer. What other colours would be okay? They've said not black but I think that means not 'all black', doesn't it?

Such a stupid thing to be worrying about.

[valiumredhead]

Honestly, wear whatever you like, people aren't like they used to be and wear head to toe black these days. Anything will be ok especially as they have specified not traditional funeral attire.

Sorry for your loss x

[domesticslattern]

Gosh I'm sorry judy, I didn't come back to the thread. You probably have it sorted by now. If they have said not black then as valium says, it doesn't matter too much. A black blazer over a bright top would be fine, I think, or just whatever you might wear for a smart day at the office without too much leg or cleavage.
It's normal btw to worry about what to wear- for me it was about the only part of the whole thing where I was in control, plus I didn't want to be judged if I got it wrong. In the end no one notices unless it's wildly inappropriate- think canary yellow sundress etc.

[Judyandherdreamofhorses]

Thanks. I do actually have to go out and buy something. I've been I maternity leave and have no smart clothes at all. Apart from a dress I wore for a family wedding the other week - definitely not right! I know I should wear 'what I like', but I'm not going in jeans and have literally nothing else!

[MrsLettuce]

Sorry to hear of your loss. Are you doing OK?

green suit you?.

To the knee or longer is fine, just not short. Trousers would be fine too, it doesn't sound like it'll be awfully formal.

[MrsLettuce]

THis with these would be faff free and appropriate

[Judyandherdreamofhorses]

Thanks for the suggestion. I think I'd feel that dress was too short. But I like the colour and could wear black jacket with it.

[Judyandherdreamofhorses]

Oh posted too soon. I might love the dove dress. I would need navy shoes though, wouldn't I? Shoe shopping is hateful!

[MrsLettuce]

Length depends on your height of course. Model will be at least 5'8" if not 5'11". As a shortie I forget that some people aren't!

[MrsLettuce]

Cute, cheap and not too high shoes were duely linked

[Judyandherdreamofhorses]

Oh I'm not tall. I've now fallen in love with the navy dress. Wonder what the sizing is like.

[Judyandherdreamofhorses]

Yes, the shoes were lovely. But I am foul of foot (bunions, fallen arches, generally foul) and lovely shoes are usually impossible. However, it won't be for long. You're so kind, thanks.

[MrsLettuce]

AFAIK Phase8 are pretty true to size and it looks like a real wrap so there would be a reasonable deal of flexibility, I think.

[Judyandherdreamofhorses]

I might even be able to breastfeed in it - added bonus! Hopefully won't have to though. I'm going to stop dithering and order it and the shoes now. That will give me time to get to the shops if they don't work out. Thanks.

Is jewellery appropriate at a funeral? If so, what? It's a non religious ceremony. I don't have anything he gave me.

[MrsLettuce]

I have awful feet too, wide, bunions,shitty arches, the whole shebang. M&S? these would be fine. Maybe these if you're not as flippery as me

[MrsLettuce]

Jewelry if you want but not obligatory. Do you have some?

[Judyandherdreamofhorses]

Dress arrived today. It's lovely.

However, just got an email from stepmum to say 'wear bright clothes'.

So I guess it'll be going back.

And now I have to find something bright. I don't think I like anything bright. But I know I have to respect the request. What will men wear? DH certainly hasn't got anything bright.

[TheWoollybacksWife]

Don't send the dress back unless you absolutely want to - it may be something you could wear again anyway. Buy something like a cerise cardigan to wear over the top. Navy and cerise/fuschia look lovely together and would fit the "bright" requirement.

[domesticslattern]

Yes yes, cerise cardigan would be perfect.
I would suggest my DH dressed as though he was going to a wedding so suit but not a dark tie. I could be wildly off the mark here though.

[Judyandherdreamofhorses]

Oh I hadn't thought of that. Good idea. What else goes well with navy?

[BriansBrain]

Don't send the dress back if you like it! I think the white doves make it bright.

No one is going to say anything.

I hope you are ok.

[MrsLettuce]

How about adding this and these? The white doves are bright and hopeful, I though.

[MrsLettuce]

It's a neutral so pretty much anything.

[tethersend]

I wouldn't kill the dress with a cardigan, but I agree with bright accessories- neck scarf and shoes/bag would be my choice.