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Do you worry about looking 'mutton'?

(40 Posts)
freddiefrog Fri 01-Feb-13 19:02:27

I'm no fashionista but I do like clothes and making an effort with outfits.

I overheard a bit of a bitch-up this morning at school about certain women dressing inappropriately for their age - I don't know if it was directed at me, but it did make me look at myself and wonder if my choice in clothing is a little bit off.

I don't think I dress outlandishly or particularly young - today's outfit is skinny khaki trousers, t-shirt, black and cream striped jacket and Ash wedges. Nothing amazing, but I like it and it looks better than it sounds - well, in my head it did.

So, at 37, with 2 children, what am I supposed to be wearing?

Monty27 Sun 03-Feb-13 01:27:54

That's the point though, if you don't feel comfortable in it don't do it. Wear what you feel good in.

BistoBearWithBaublesOn Sun 03-Feb-13 01:25:35

I had a similar "am I mutton dressed as lamb" moment at uni this week. I'm a very mature student at 35 years old. One of my 20 year old classmates came into class wearing the same shorts and same coloured tights as I was wearing!

MerlotAndMe Sun 03-Feb-13 01:25:14

No because my taste wouldn't put me at risk of it really, although occasionally something appeals to me, like tartan trousers, and I have to gently console myself, nearly 43 + tartan trousers,, no no no.

Monty27 Sun 03-Feb-13 01:21:16

Kristina I wouldn't give anyone the satisfaction of explaining or apologising for myself. You are what you are.

Sod them.

Monty27 Sun 03-Feb-13 01:18:25

Your attire sounds quite classy to me. Keep it there and ignore -the biatches-- smile

KristinaM Sun 03-Feb-13 01:13:09

Other things it might say are ....

I'm on my way to the gym as I'm a shift worker or work part time
I'm just going out running or walking the dog
I'm a PE teacher or personal trainer and I'm on my way to work
I've just had major surgery and its the only thing that's confortable
I'm a carer for a disabled child or elderly relative and find these clothes confortable and pratical
I'm struggling with depression and can hardly even get my kids out the door, let alone worry about what to wear please don't judge me

gangbangstyle Sat 02-Feb-13 21:57:04

"What am I supposed to be wearing?" Whatever you like! Your outfit sounds really nice and who cares what anyone says. I love it when women pickup/drop off in clothes that are stylish and a bit thought-out/different, I look carefully at what they're wearing, really admire them (silently), then wonder what their shoes/boots/top/skirt would look like on me and where can I get one... haven't managed it yet but I am sometimes on the verge of going up to them and asking them where they got their <thing I like> from. Then it all goes a bit mental - I start wondering if their husband/partner is stylish too, what they like about their wife's/partner's style and wonder if anyone might fancy me if they thought I was stylish too - I'm single (not that I am considering pinching a husband).

Keep wearing nice things to the playground! I'm enjoying it!

The look I hate the most in the playground is the track suit bottom, it not only looks awful, but is says either "I'm just on the way to the gym because I can afford not to work because my husband pays the mortgage ", or "I was too busy to shower and dress before school so although I smell a bit now, I'll do all that preening when I'm home - and yes, I can do that because my husband pays the mortgage. "

polyhymnia Sat 02-Feb-13 19:01:27

Gosh, it's this sort of thread that makes me so glad I used, because i worked full-time, just to drop my DS off at school most morning, in smart but work-y clothes, and not linger. Sounds like these women who make these catty comments have nothing better to do, to me.

Your outfit sounds excellent and not at all too 'young'. Couldn't hack the wedges for evryday life myself, but know people who can. i used to commute (including dropping off DS) in reasonably smart but comfortable flats, and keep shoes with heels in a drawer at work to change into!

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie Sat 02-Feb-13 18:06:26

I'm 42 (v nearly 43) and I wear similar - eg today was skinny khaki trousers, biker jacket and heeled ankle boots. I often wear v short skirts too - I have good legs and intend to wear them for a while longer yet!

carmenelectra Sat 02-Feb-13 17:43:51

Don't think I'd risk high heels on the school run, what with pushing a pushchair too, its too risky.

When we had the bad snow the other week and it had turned icey, there was me in moon boots walking like a snail and this mother with about 4 inch wedge ankle boots! I could hardly bear to look at her in case she went over.

Of course I still had full slap on but I think the moon boots and walking like an old lady, showed my true age smile

snowmummy Sat 02-Feb-13 17:42:42

I feel exactly the same as you OP. I always make an effort and wear clothes that I think are nice but then look around the playground and wonder whether I should be wearing trackies and an anorak.

freddiefrog Sat 02-Feb-13 13:33:53

Sorry, crossed posts - I don't have nose-wiping little ones anymore, mine are 7 and 11 and are past the age of me having to leg it after them when they make a run for it.

freddiefrog Sat 02-Feb-13 13:30:26

Yeah, I'd hate to be called mumsy as well grin

It's not even that I'm some amazing trend setter or look like I've just stepped out of Vogue magazine. I live in a very sailing obsessed area and there's a sort of uniform that most mums wear

I hate sailing so I'm in between the mum uniform and PJs/tracksuit bottoms gangs

motherofluvlies Sat 02-Feb-13 13:25:05

It,s the wedges!There is a mum at our school who wears those bright coloured wedges and they are fab-u-lous BUT they look incredibly out of place for the school run.It doesn't help that she has a lovely lively little boy who zooms around and she has to shout at him to stop.I always tell her they look amazing ( and they do and so does she) but so out of place that they make her look a little silly.Thats an opinion I have never shared in the playground nor have I heard comments.She always looks lovely but very silly when she has to hurry.The rest of your outfit sounds amazing.How do you stop the children from wiping their hands,noses, bags e.t.c. On the cream blazer?Maybe that's what the mums meant cause I don't see how the outfit you have described could be " mutton" unless its cropped or see thru.....ooh those were the days.....sounds like a lovely outfit to me and I am one of those dowdy mums.

GobblersKnob Sat 02-Feb-13 13:19:02

It doesn't sound mutton in the slighest, though if someone was going to complain about my dress sense I would rather be called mutton than mumsy any day of the week.

I am the same age as you and doing an arty degree at uni, I have fallen into dressing like everyone else, but the face lets me down grin

retrocutie Sat 02-Feb-13 13:09:03

Ha, ha carmenelectra, yeah, me too. False tan, false lashes, hair extensions... even my boobs are fake grin

freddiefrog Sat 02-Feb-13 13:03:13


I know I shouldn't have let it get to me, I don't even know for sure that they were actually talking about me.

Usually, I'm far more 'fuck off' about stuff like this, I'm really not sure why I care so much this time.

Next week I am definately wearing my new leopard print heels for the school run!!

joliejolie Sat 02-Feb-13 12:54:50

Nooooooo....don't give them that power!!!
Offhand comments are so bad because they have probably forgotten every word, but you will always remember because you think they were aimed at you.
Sigh. I know how it feels, but you just have to move past it all. You won't agree with everyone and don't allow these judgy "super mummy" types to upset you. Sometimes I see how other mums look at me and I don't care. My kids are a priority to me, but so am I! I have to wear what makes me feel good. Also helps that dh loves my confidence and how I look.
Wear what you like if you feel good wearing it.

freddiefrog Sat 02-Feb-13 12:47:06


They weren't badly dressed or anything, just a bit more of a Mummy Uniform if you see what I mean, but they frown on people who wear make-up or spend time on their hair in that 'well, I'd rather spend time with my children' way that people have.

They certainly have nothing to be jealous of grin

I suppose I'm just starting to find my style and confidence and hearing that has knocked it a bit.


Gingefringe Sat 02-Feb-13 08:22:47

So were these bitchy mums gorgeous, slim and really well dressed? Bet they weren't. They seem jealous to me.
Your outfit sounds great. Go for it

carmenelectra Sat 02-Feb-13 08:13:03

Oh and I hardly talk to anyone at the school. No way do I want to get involved in all that.

I'm hoping retrocutie is talking about me. smileha ha

carmenelectra Sat 02-Feb-13 08:06:55

op you sound chic, not mutton. Anyway, at 37 you have nothing to worry about.
I'm older and definitely muttonsmile
Fake fur coat
Fake tan
False eyelashes
The lot
As others have said, its better than frumpy.
Age should be no barrier to anything, its how you wear it.

To be told I look mumsy would be my worst nightmare.

retrocutie Sat 02-Feb-13 07:41:57

They're jealous.

There is a mum at my DC's school who always looks fab. I really admire her. She clearly looks after herself and makes the effort to look nice, although never overdressed. I have spoken to her a few times and she is also a really, really nice girl.

However, a few days ago I was with a group of mums and she walked past. They all started mumbling to each other, "bitch", "who does she think she is?", and things like that. I asked what their problem was and one of them said, "well, just look at her...".


50ShadesOfMaybe Sat 02-Feb-13 07:36:41

Your outfit sounds fine, OP. Ignore the bitching at the school gates - dreadful places for cliques to form.

I'm older than you and I wear pretty much what I like: shiny, coated skinnies, shorts with tights, brightly patterned leggings, DMs, etc. I worry about looking a bit "mutton" sometimes, but then I worry about being frumpy more!

KristinaM Fri 01-Feb-13 22:28:45

Nope, I'm with night sky and Marian, I woudl wear that outfit . I'm 50 with 6 kids . < sticks out tongue>

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