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what should I wear to a memorial service?

(17 Posts)
toastandmarmiterocks Wed 24-Aug-11 21:42:38

My DH's grandfather died, there is going to be a memorial service. My inlaws are not my biggest fans. I am from London, they all hate London and definitely view it as the big racy city. None of them ever wear heels despite no one topping 5 foot (other than DH but he doesn't wear heels grin ). They will all be dressed very conventionally, yawn, no imagination. Of course I don't want to dress in appropriately but I want to look good. (so many issues with the inlaws, wouldn't want to bore you with details but I need to feel uber confident). I am thinking black pencil skirt with these which are the only shoes I have other than bright colours, I don't have any black shoes and would rather buy a top than shoes.

What should I wear on top? Can I get away with the shoes? I have a very lightweight long black cardi that is quite smart, I certainly don't want to wear a suit jacket (don't have one anyway!)

Oh and I am skint!

AnyFucker Wed 24-Aug-11 21:46:09

those shoes are ok, if the rest of your outfit is black (the skirt and cardi)

I don't quite understand why you are viewing such a sad occasion as an opportunity for you to stick one to the inlaws though confused

AnyFucker Wed 24-Aug-11 21:46:56

oh, you want to buy a top

I would buy a silky pussy bow blouse in a muted colour

toastandmarmiterocks Wed 24-Aug-11 22:16:30

I don't want to stick one to the inlaws. Sorry if it came across like that. Its just that they make me feel like shit so I want to feel that I look nice and I will feel more confident to get through the whole day.
I suppose I am a little worried that they will raise an eyebrow at high heels and pencil skirt although I don't really care if they do so long as I look nice. If the whole of mumsnet screams WRONG WRONG WRONG then I will have to have a re think.
I like the idea of a silky pussy bow blouse, had already searched for a black one but it was a bit too see-thru (and I know that would be inappropriate blush . )

AnyFucker Wed 24-Aug-11 22:19:18

I don't that outfit is wrong.

I think a creamy, brown, grey or beige blouse would be ok too, not necessarily black if your skirt/cardi is black

Really though, I don't think your inlaws are going to be concentrating much on you, since one of their parents just died. Just a thought.

AnyFucker Wed 24-Aug-11 22:20:19

I love the shoes, btw

They are not exactly stripper heels are they wink

toastandmarmiterocks Wed 24-Aug-11 22:30:11

Oh I'll be totally blanked as I always am. I just want to look good in the process! And my sisters in law (all three) won't miss a trick. Its a not the funeral its the big social memorial service, I'm not going to the funeral, DH is going without me.

AnyFucker Wed 24-Aug-11 22:37:57

Is it worth it, seriously ?

It sounds like what blouse to wear is the least of your issues here

toastandmarmiterocks Wed 24-Aug-11 22:41:00

yes but I'm just looking for advice on the outfit not all the other stuff.

AnyFucker Wed 24-Aug-11 22:44:28

fair 'nuff

toastandmarmiterocks Wed 24-Aug-11 22:46:37


AnyFucker Wed 24-Aug-11 22:48:45

Well, I hope it goes as well as it could

Can I say that ? wink

cat64 Wed 24-Aug-11 22:50:52

Message withdrawn

AnyFucker Wed 24-Aug-11 22:52:41

summat like this ?

AnyFucker Wed 24-Aug-11 22:55:06

this is pretty and no sleeves to bunch up under a light cardigan

toastandmarmiterocks Wed 24-Aug-11 23:16:10

Thanks AF, say what you like, whole point innit? I think I prefer the second one, might look too like a secretary in the first one.

Cat, I've got an idea in my head although I'm not definite. I would like to hear other options too thats why I ask.

happilyeverafter Wed 24-Aug-11 23:35:19

I attended a memorial service last summer, wore a black fitted jesire wool shift dress with matching jacket, bare legs, pearls and aubergine courts.

People wore all sorts, I prefer more formal dress though.

I would say pencil skirt/heels/blouse very appropriate dress. A cardi and muted colour shoe absolutely fine, personally i would keep jewellery/accessories minimal as one lady had loads of bracelets on that jangled, it was quite distracting when we were trying to listen to readings.

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