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Why do some people have effortless style and others don't?

(14 Posts)
Socy Thu 11-Aug-11 11:40:16

I saw a teenager the other day who had that kind of effortless style - she was admittedly beautiful, but wearing fairly scruffy off-white chinos and a t-shirt that again was off-white although was probably once white. I just don't know how to put things together, but I would love my daughter to have more of a sense of style - how can I help her to get it?

Rubiesandrainbows Thu 11-Aug-11 14:43:24

Socy I would start buying fashion magazines. These are great for ideas and also if a particular item/look is seen in one, then you/your daughter can have more confidance trying out yourself. And then if people stare a bit, you know your look is current and its them that has no idea about style, and not you smile

Hassled Thu 11-Aug-11 14:50:56

I think it's less about a sense of style (although that helps) and more about the fact some people are just natural clothes horses - clothes just look good regardless of how stylish they are. I wish I had it.

Violet5 Thu 11-Aug-11 15:03:30

I have so little sense of syle that rather than wonder around a shop wondering what on earth to buy i now find a manequin that's dressed nicely and then buy the whole outfit. Often amuses the staff as i often ask where about the various items are in the shop, i don't just strip the manequin grin. It makes my shopping a lot faster and less stressful so it works for me smile i'm hopeless at putting bits together. My teenage daughter mismatches a lot of her things and manages to look cool, think i'm to old to get away with it though so i'm glad she doesn't ask for my help blush

Bonsoir Thu 11-Aug-11 15:17:43

You won't have style if you don't spend a lot of time looking at other people's style for inspiration.

wicketkeeper Thu 11-Aug-11 15:58:22

Don't think for one minute that it's effortless.

Socy Thu 11-Aug-11 16:00:15

Fashion magazines - oooh not really me, which is probably part of the problem grin Might give it a go though, we do tend to look together when in waiting rooms etc.
hassled yes I think the girl I saw is a natural clothes horse but why?? I had a great figure at her age and never looked good. I guess I had no self awareness or confidence.
Violet buying a whole outfit is a great idea and I would definately do this for a special occasion.

TattyDevine Thu 11-Aug-11 16:05:35

Not to delve too deep here but why do you want your daughter to have it? Does she want it? If so, she will probably find a way to get it or at least improve it?

Also, to just challenge a little bit the notion that style mags will give a teen more confidence. Make sure you give her a pep talk about airbrushing and all that crap that goes on

But not to be too sanctimonious about it all - if she has indicated that she needs a bit of a push in the right direction, fair enough - perhaps she needs an inspirational person she relates to, not necessarily a celeb, but perhaps someone she can "channel" until she finds her own way?

BelleDameSansMerci Thu 11-Aug-11 16:09:13

<swans in, stylishly --in my dreams-->

For me, it came from watching old movies. As a result, I tend to favour a 1950s/60s sort of look which makes it easy to be perceived as stylish. I can't 'do' smart casual very well though. I wonder if it's about finding a style that suits your shape and exploiting it?

CubiksRube Thu 11-Aug-11 17:11:16

It isn't effortless!

You take a young, beautiful and slim (I assume) girl in a mismatched outfit and you have a clothes horse. Put the saem thing on someone else and you have a tramp. The clothes horse knows it, too, her mismatched style is probably very well matched indeed.

How old is your daughter? If you want her to have generic 'style', let her loose in Topshop at Oxford Circus with a bit of cash. She can BUY 'style', or an approximation of it. Or, just let her develop at her own pace. I spent my teen years in baggy jeans with brylcreem in my hair (don't ask) and turned out ok! [manic grin]

Rubiesandrainbows Thu 11-Aug-11 18:10:52

just to clarify: I'm not meaning pay close attention to the models themselves, more what the clothes are worn with. And my version of fashion magazines is not celeb magazines, except for Grazia and Look which can be really good at high street stuff whereas vogue/in style/marie claire concentrates on the overall "look" whether the stuff is a few grand, or a few hundred (as in limitless budget, but ultimately, everything found on the catwalk gets watered down for the high street)

And this is maybe more a fashion thing, but I watch all the next seasons shows online when they are available. Gets me thinking for things to look for in the high street, whats gonna suit me, and also hair and makeup ideas (not off the models more like my hair is quite beachy right now and I'm quite into vintage, but if I started to like a more polished "look" I might think about my future hair) Its better to be ahead than catching up ;)

I agree that "effortless" is hardly ever that, but it does have alot to do with confidance. Anyone feeling very self conscious is going to look that way too, great outfit or otherwise but if you know you look good, it kind of exudes of you know what I mean?

BelleDameSansMerci Thu 11-Aug-11 18:20:28

There's a conversation in a book by F Scott Fitzgerald - can't remember which one, maybe Tender Is The Night - about how true glamour or style can only be achieved if the individual is not self conscious in any way. That always stayed with me. I think it's well observed.

Poshbaggirl Thu 11-Aug-11 18:28:42

Go to shops when they are quietest and ask for help. The girls who work in our New Look are so sweet and trendy and helpful. Ask their advice on what suits your body shape and ask what key pieces would be good basics. Gok manages a capsule of 24 pieces. You have to work out what suits you.

Socy Thu 11-Aug-11 18:33:58

DD is only 13 but the only girl so doesn't have anyone to 'copy'. She mostly just wants to wear what her friends are wearing, which is fine for now. I would just like her to make more of herself in 5 years time than I did at that age. smile

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