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Funeral wear for 18 month old?

(24 Posts)
VFVF Tue 05-Jul-11 17:14:42

Can anyone help? Unfortunately a dear family friend has died, and the funeral is next week. Their family really want me to bring DD (18 months) at least to the wake, as they are very fond of her.
The problem is I cant find anything suitable for her to wear! With it being the height of summer the shops are full of bright summery clothes, but I'm a little old fashioned and want her in something more sombre. I know some funerals are held with people wearing bright colours but this hasnt been stipulated so Im assuming its traditional mourning type wear.
I know my chances of getting something black is slim (plus, being practical, its unlikely she would wear it again) I know at christmas time you can get nice dark green or burgandy dresses which is what I have pictured, but I cant find anything that would be suitable!
I would be grateful for any suggestions!

Madlizzy Tue 05-Jul-11 17:15:36

No one will expect you to dress a baby in funeral clothes. Just put her in something she'd normally wear.

Georgimama Tue 05-Jul-11 17:18:13

Agreed, I took DS to my uncle's funeral when he was about nine months. I deliberately avoided anything too bright or jovial but no one would expect a baby to be in black. My SIL's mother died last year and I took the grandchildren along to the wake after babysitting them for the funeral. They were all dressed in entirely normal summer clothes. No one batted an eyelid.

Either select something that is a bit shabby or purchase something from a charity shop/Primark in her size and dye it. You will probably need to run it through the wash a few times post-dyeing to be absolutely sure that it won't stain anyone else's outfits if they cuddle her, but most coldwater dyes these days are easy to use and effective.

Other than that, google Goth Clothes Kids and you might find something suitable. Or try Ebay.

worldgonecrazy Tue 05-Jul-11 17:20:31

We put DD in a tartan dress for her Grandmother's funeral. As has been said, no one expects babies to be in dark colours, and they bring a ray of light to an otherwise unhappy occasion.

Northernlurker Tue 05-Jul-11 17:20:49

Just go for a nice summer dress. Children don't wear mourning even if adults do.
I took dd2 to a friend's funeral when she was 6 months old. She wore a simple navy summer dress.
White is a mourning colour in some cultures. You could look for something in white which at least she would wear again.

ellangirl Tue 05-Jul-11 17:21:42

Something like this or this? Or this? Really though, I agree with mad, nobody will expect her to wear dark clothes.

meditrina Tue 05-Jul-11 17:23:12

Anything not too frivolous looking would be fine. So I'd avoid really bright (especially clashing) colours, film/TV tie-ins, most slogans/cartoons.

I'd choose a pastel coloured dress in a fairly traditional style.

Northernlurker Tue 05-Jul-11 17:25:36

Boden have still got this in white and in blue in the right size. That would be fine.

Pelagia Tue 05-Jul-11 17:25:53

Sorry for your loss.

Do you have a TK Maxx nearby? They usually have things in out of season colours. I got DD a really lovely black dress for her great grandads funeral and although it really doesn't matter what children wear, it felt 'right' that she was wearing it.

belindarose Tue 05-Jul-11 17:27:26

I've got nice black sundress with little white spots and a navy dress with bigger white spots. Both age 18-24 or 12-18, can't remember. If you'd like them, pm me. Sorry to hear about your friend.

nagynolonger Tue 05-Jul-11 17:28:07

Surely it won't matter what a baby or a toddler wears at a funeral. I would dress her in normal clothes. My youngest went to GP funeral in the navy blue trousers he wore for a familly wedding a few weeks before.

SootySweepandSue Tue 05-Jul-11 17:29:21

Gaps new season has a lot of black, with reds and creams. I received an email from this this morning and did think it looked very autumny which may be ok for a funeral.

Tillyscoutsmum Tue 05-Jul-11 17:31:06

I agree its probably not necessary but if you feel more comfortable then how about something like this?

this ?

purple

navy spot

blue

Sorry about your friend sad

Rindercella Tue 05-Jul-11 17:32:35

Very sorry to hear about your friend.

Both my DDs came to DH's funeral. DD2 was about 13 months old. Both girls wore pretty dresses, nothing sombre. DD1 (3.5yrs) picked out her own dress and I matched DD2's dress to that.

I really wouldn't worry about it too much. I think small children at funerals bring an awful lot of joy - some of it bitter-sweet. No-one there would expect an 18 month old baby to be wearing dark clothes.

wobblyweeble82 Tue 05-Jul-11 17:33:43

Just something simple, a sleepsuit even.

Sorry to hear about your loss.

HooverTheHamaBeads Tue 05-Jul-11 17:34:40

No one will expect her to be dressed in dark clothes.

But if you really want to why not try ebay for a long navy or even denim dress?

paulapantsdown Tue 05-Jul-11 17:34:52

Sorry for your loss - but please just dress your baby in your favourite outfit. It does not matter what colour it is, she is a little baby.

It is also irrelevant what colour the adults wear too by the way ... this whole black funeral thing is just tradition because in days gone by people would have one decent "church" outfit - and formal clothes were normally sold in black.

In Ireland, where there isn't the whole 'wait for an invitation' thing like here, people generally attend a lot more funerals, and just wear something smart/dressy.

Please do not give this another minutes thought.

VFVF Tue 05-Jul-11 17:52:00

Thank you to everyone for your kind suggestions and condolances. He was a lovely man (he is my best friend's dad) and it was quite unexpected.
Thank you belindarose for your kind offer, I may well take you up on it! I'm going shopping tomorrow, there have been some lovely suggestions made, actually all of them are very doable! It is more for my own (old fashioned) ideas than anything that has been stipulated, I'm sure they wouldn't mind really what she wears!

belindarose Tue 05-Jul-11 17:57:23

Well you'd be very welcome. Hope you find something you're satisfied with if it'll help you cope with it all better.

miche8 Tue 05-Jul-11 20:42:38

the myleen klass range for mothercare usually has lots of black/dark colours. But i agree i don't think anyone would notice if they wore normal clothes.

HooverTheHamaBeads Wed 06-Jul-11 10:33:40

Some lovely navy linen dresses in the Jojo summer sale too.

Pigleychez Wed 06-Jul-11 17:32:47

Next have some Navy nautical themed clothes.

DD1 came to a funeral at about that age and wore a purple tshirt and a purple tartan pinifore dress. From Tesco.

wahwahwah Wed 06-Jul-11 17:34:16

Anything should be ok. Maybe white - I wore that to my dads funeral as black was banned.

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