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any burnt-out baby brains out there? Need some support!

(2 Posts)
BBLucy1891 Sat 13-Aug-16 13:39:33

Brain-Frazzled. Its the only word. Doing (trying to do) a PhD (social sciences, quant, 2nd year) with a 7 month old. No childminder, no creche and no family or friends nearby. Not even near my uni for support. Anyway, I know I'm lucky/privileged to be getting this opportunity and to get the chance to be at home with baby rather than having to go back to work. But just feel fried. Some days better than others, but I literally have about 10 minutes at a time to concentrate. Boyfriend comes home from work at 6 shattered. I'm so tired by then I can't even hold a conversation or even sometimes be civil. I study during naps, at weekends and occasionally when she goes to bed in the evening. And I'm on a full-time scholarship (no option for part-time but supervisors very understanding and don't put me under too much pressure). Anyway - student moms - how do you manage? I feel like we should get extra points for having to study in 10-minute batches!! I've resorted to copious amounts of coffee, borocca and power naps. Still breastfeeding and baby not sleeping through the night...ever...so probably why I'm so tired. Also - and I'd love some advice here - feel bad getting boyfriend to do housework, look after baby when he gets in because he's literally exhausted. We both are, but at least I have the option of a nap/sleep in with the baby while he gets up at 6am. How do you divide up housework when you're studying (hence more flexible)? Anyway....rambling...need sleep..Yesterday I left my phone in the fridge for 5 hours - and I'm supposed to be producing academic work!! TIA!!

Somerville Sat 13-Aug-16 14:02:28

I got pregnant and had DD1 whilst post-grad. (Masters in Classics, though, and based in Oxford with a fair bit of student parent support, so very different study set up to yours.)

Your boyfriend isn't trying to do his work alongside looking after a baby. So entirely fair enough that he does the housework IMO. My DH (DD1 was honeymoon baby) certainly did, the whole time I was breastfeeding and had her FT.

I think I vaguely remember that if I drank a lot of coffee while breastfeeding my babies slept less well.

Are you getting out and about with your baby? I went to some toddler groups and made some friends. Even swapped off child care with one of them, who was working from home. Also getting fresh air and exercise is important for both of you, and will lead to her sleeping longer.

It will all be worth it in the end. flowers

My DD1 is now about to start GCSE's, including Ancient Greek and Latin. I'm convinced that my masters taking up her formative months was good for her brain. grin

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