How do we cope with new baby whilst studying?

(7 Posts)
Wharm14 Sun 17-Apr-16 21:19:12

Hi,
Really need some advice please. My DH is studying for a degree, currently in his first year. He has dyslexia and mild depression so studying is already challenging for him and he spends hours studying. We now have a six week old baby. I am on maternity leave from my job, with my income set to drop dramatically in a couple of weeks time. My DH also works part time, to try and keep some money coming in. I am breastfeeding and haven't managed to establish a routine yet so I'm finding it hard to even put a load of washing through, never mind keep on top go the housework, cook etc which I used to do a lot of to allow my DH to study.
Can you share with me your experiences of how you coped if one of you was studying and trying to run a house and keep income coming in? We are drowning, I'm really worried about money and my poor DH is really struggling to study and help me look after our little one. The only good thing is the baby sleeps quite well at night!
Thanks x

AnstasiaBartAraminta Mon 30-May-16 18:50:15

I really understand your struggle, I had my eldest at 16 when I was still in high school. I won't lie it was one of the hardest things I have ever done but two year later I got my diploma. I had really wanted to go to Yale, but I realized that that was completely out of the question so I went to college in the same state that I lived in. I watched her and studied got my family and friends to watch her whilst I was at class. But if you keep trying get all the family support that you can and you and DH will do amazingly. Ignore anyone that tells you you won't be able to do it, in my high school everyone told me that I would end up on welfare and amount to nothing, as a 16 year old single parent, but now I'm a lawyer and part time psychiatrist, if it's in your families budget maybe get a cleaner. Take her out of the house during that day to family's and friends or to the park to allow your husband time to study, but remember however that it is important for him to carry some of the weight in the home, as otherwise you'll end up resenting him xx

winchester1 Mon 30-May-16 19:15:18

I'd say firstly your husband has to go to a corner of the house and wear ear plugs/ play music etc to drown out baby noise.

For yourself a basic rota of essential jobs (assuming you cant just blitz at the weekend) so washing on after first feed, and get your breaky, and rest. If its a clingy baby use nap time (when holding them) to rest/eat/do family admi (check your budget and costs). Wash up once a day. 5 min clean of bathroom while.brushing your teeth etc. Only cook easy meals, but try to plan as it will save money.

Mostly remember the baby can cry for a few min and no harm will come to them.

You'll get into the swing of it esp with summer holidays around the corner.

(We both worked 3days a week and I also studied 50%, dc1 was 16months when dc2 came along.)

Wharm14 Tue 31-May-16 10:34:58

Thank you for your replies folks, little one is now 12 weeks old and we've got a little routine established and I bought a sling which enables me to get him to nap during the day and I can get a few things done! He's starting to be more alert and wanting to play, not feeding as much (I think he was cluster feeding when I posted and I was constantly feeding him!)

DH is only two weeks away from finishing from the summer hols and he has got a new job which brings in more money cause they are able to offer him more hours than he had in his old part time job.

Still have money concerns but we've coped so far and I'm looking for part time work to go back to. I'd still be interested to hear from others who are in the same boat though!

winchester1 Tue 31-May-16 20:32:37

Nice to hear things are on the up for you all. Mine loved to sit in a bouncy chair or pram and watch me doing housework, gardening at the age.

AmberGreyson Tue 21-Jun-16 12:25:08

My secret is simple. I sleep 3-4 hours per day. My baby is 5 months old, I am finishing my study (currently write dissertation) and I have part time job. My husband helps me but it happens very seldom. It's hard to cope with childcare and study. When my baby is sleeping I study, but I need to finish it till 27 June. I guess I am forced to use custom writing service. I can't quit job 'cause we need money.

TheFlyingFauxPas Thu 28-Jul-16 21:13:37

I can't believe there are companies out there who do that! Don't use them op! Who wants a degree they haven't earned? confused

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