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(10 Posts)
hpsauce123 Wed 29-Jul-09 09:21:18

Ive been married for 8 years but still feeling confused about my role with my step children!
My hubby is too soft with his kids and i think thats because he feels guilty for leaving them even though the wife kicked him out!
The children are manipulative and clever and use their father like a bank! They are very cheeky to me and an example is when the boy comes round he will go thru my drawers which i find really intrusive.
When i ask my hubby to discipline them he says they only come to see him every 3 weeks and does not want to drive them away!
I regrt marrying him had i known life would be so stressful and feel depressed all the time!!
Any advice out there i wud be so grateful!!

mrsjammi Wed 29-Jul-09 09:43:51

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hpsauce123 Wed 29-Jul-09 10:59:53

Thankyou so much for such wise words and avice.
Please can i elaborate on my circumstance as i really need a listening ear!!!
I am 42 yrs old with a daughter 22 who is married and a daughter of 21 & a boy 14 yrs old who both live in london with their dad who will not allow me to see my kids as they made their choice of living with him as they didnt like iving with me in blackburn as all their family are in london! This upset me a great deal and i feel guilty about it!
My husband will not move to london because his 3 kids & family live in manchester and so it is practical for him to live in blackburn.
I just feel it is really unfair that i had to sacrifice for him my family, friends and children! But he says that was my kids choice not to live with us!
I just feel so isolated and sometimes bitter towards his kids as he treats them like royalty and tells me his kids come before me!

msled Wed 29-Jul-09 11:07:25

What do you mean he won't let you see them? Do they want to see you? The older daughter (21) in particular can surely do what she wants. To be honest, your relationship with your husband sounds pretty awful from what you've written. What do you get out of it?

hpsauce123 Wed 29-Jul-09 11:14:35

Sorry i think you have misunderstood. Its my ex husband who wont let me see my kids. But i do try and go over to london when i can and me an my kids meet up secretly.

mrsjammi Wed 29-Jul-09 11:18:39

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hpsauce123 Wed 29-Jul-09 11:51:01

Thankyou so much for listening and all your kind words you dont know how much it means to me!!!
I am going to heed your advice and try to rebuild my marriage. As he is a good man and that was why i married him in the first place.

Can i just ask your advice on this matter:
Basically its his daugters birthday on sat an she is goin to be 11yrs old now he is saying them that day should i go with him or let him go on his own as i know they will ask to go shoppin etc?

mrsjammi Wed 29-Jul-09 11:56:16

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hpsauce123 Wed 29-Jul-09 12:01:16

Again thanks for ur advice.
I am so bad at making decisions as all my life i had my 2 elder sis to turn to but they have passed away with cancer at the young age of 40 and 45!!!
So thankyou so much i pray that you are blessed with peace and happiness. (Ameen)

mrsjammi Wed 29-Jul-09 12:29:34

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