Why does something so trivial make me instantly anxious?

[Nelli29]

Hello everyone, its me again. How are you all doing?
Things have been good with me, although this morning my dh has just rung to say the bm rang him to ask him if he could look after sd after school today as she is working and her mum who would normally have sd can't today. Now this is obviously fine, and dh is bringing sd back to ours after school (we live 25 miles away) then we are driving back again and meeting bm early evening to drop sd off. This is all fine I know, especially as we are going to the drop off point tonight anyway as we are meeting a couple of friends for a meal. We are dropping off sd 15 minutes before meeting our friends at the same place.

My dh and I have been a little stressed with each other over the past couple of months and we had a big chat and decided we need to get out more and have fun, hence meeting up tonight. I was really looking forward to it but now , and I know I'm being incredibly petty, its going to be a rush, dh is not going to relax into the evening as he will be cooking tea etc for sd which again I know is fine but having sd around just changes everything.

I have just read this back and it sound incredibly selfish and silly, and I don't understand why I have that feeling in the pit of my stomach (you all know the one), after all its only for a couple of hours or so?!

Am I selfish for feeling this way? I just hate the way bm can effect our lifes when she feels like it.

Feel alot better already just by typing all that!

[otto]

One of the hard things about being a step-parent is having to be accommodating even when you don't feel like it. So no, I don't think you are being selfish, but I do think you're being slightly irrational. It's obviously annoying that your dh has to do this driving, but it's not going to make a huge difference to your night out. So go out and enjoy youreslf and don't let this spoil your night

[tarantula]

Hi Nelli I can understand how you feel as it isnt nice to have plans changed esp if you are looking forward to going out somewhere and its esp difficult if you have sd cos you are trying your best for her and dh when you should be looking forward to going out. Just think tho once you are out youll have a fab time. Feel really jealous cos dp and I are broke so its indoors with a cuppa tea for me tonight . SO GO OUT AND ENJOY TONIGHT and thats an order Youll have fun you know you will. Ah you will, you will, you will, you will, you will (said in my best Mrs Doyle voice, her from Father Ted)

[saadia]

I tend to get that feeling when I feel I have no control over my life, mostly when I have to accommodate someone else out of politeness, so I totally sympathise.