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argh - bloody court system

(14 Posts)
jammi Thu 11-Sep-08 13:56:48

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Surfermum Thu 11-Sep-08 21:07:01

Oh that's crap jammi sad. Why does she want to change the arrangement?

I used to hate the naievity of some of the judges. "We'll order xyz and leave you to arrange the rest". In other words "we'll order xyz and leave your x to tell you in no uncertain terms that that is all you are having because that's all the order says".

Or the other one that used get my goat was "you two really need to start getting on", when all dh was ever trying to do was be pleasant and sort things out.

We were just talking about this earlier after a phone call to dsd - I am sooooo pleased we are through all this and things are good now.

I really hope this gets settled soon for you.

yerblurt Fri 12-Sep-08 20:11:55

sorry to hear that jammi

so the judge basically abdicated his responsibility by first saying he wasn't going to make a decision and then did.

Was a court order made today (i.e an Interim Contact Order)

What was this decision based on?

Why was the CURRENT court order that the ex is breaching not enforced, especially as there is a cafcass report stating weekly contact. To go against a cafcass report is a area for appeal.

Why not appeal the decision? The judge has clearly not paid attention to evidence that he should have (one of the grounds for appeal) - i.e. the cafcass report.

The judge has probably misdirected himself - by not taking into account the current court order which just needs enforcing.

Personally I would appeal it.

The form you need is N161 and the court fee is £100 for filing of this. You have 14 days to file an appeal.

Was today's hearing at a magistrates before a magistrate or a judge?

jammi Sat 13-Sep-08 09:20:45

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jammi Sat 13-Sep-08 09:21:26

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yerblurt Sat 13-Sep-08 22:11:56

Jesus the comments and attitude of this judge are unbelievable. Sadly I'm not surprised by the comments.

"I'm not going to toss a coin between the two of you"

"I'm not going to waste another two hours on you"

... unbelievable.

So the current court order stating every wed contact had a CAFCASS addendum report regarding every wed... CAFCASS basically sat on the fence.

You cannot sort it out as the judge says - which is precisely why you are in court and asking him to do his job, hardly 'wasting his time' (which court was this and which judge btw?)

You weren't asking him to "toss a coin", far from it!

I would think about appealing this decision, especially as the child's behaviour is being affected by the change of circumstances...

so sorry to hear how things went...

jammi Sun 14-Sep-08 21:52:45

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Surfermum Mon 15-Sep-08 10:40:37

Oh jammi sad. And what an impossible situation for your dsd to be in sad sad. The two people she loves the most are fighting over her.

I think you have done the right thing. And thank heavens you have been able to talk it all through with her. I'm sure in years to come she will thank you for doing your best to make sure she is happy, and putting her feelings first.

jammi Mon 15-Sep-08 11:08:12

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Surfermum Mon 15-Sep-08 11:15:34

shock maybe the training will help her rethink how she is handling things and she'll view it from her dd's point of view.

yerblurt Mon 15-Sep-08 19:55:05

so sorry to hear about what has happened.... it sounds like the children are being projected onto by mum with all her control and insecurities.

She will end up a sad embittered LONELY old woman and serve her right.

If you want any advice or just a rant or a shoulder email me (

mummynumber2 Mon 15-Sep-08 21:31:15

Oh Jammi, that's so sad. I've been in tears reading it, mainly because of the similar situation we have with my DSCs and their mother.

I know this is an awful thing to say but some people are just too selfish to be a mother.

jammi Tue 16-Sep-08 00:30:37

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yerblurt Tue 16-Sep-08 20:22:51

jammi, yes I remember your DPs posts, I'm sorry to hear about how it went.

I presume you live near Cardiff (or the ex does) if your hearing was in Cardiff CC.

Have you considered contacting the Cardiff FNF branch? They are quite a large branch - please look them up.

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