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I suppose that this is normal but it is really sad.

(9 Posts)
Carmenere Sun 31-Aug-08 14:45:17

Dsd is 9 and lives in Paris. She has just spent August with us and it was very successful. we had loads of fun and she got on great. we even went to ireland and spent 10 days with my family(who spoilt her natch) and she really got the hang of speaking english which was great as it had been a bit of a problem before.

Yesterday it was her last day here and dsd(21) brought French dsd and dd(4) out for the day bowling, cinema, shopping, lunch and they had loads of fun.

And me and dp went out for dinner for a friends bday and I forgot my phone (and dp couldn't hear his) and apparently she was terribly upset because she wanted to stay here and go to school here and she wanted to ring her mum to tell hersad So i suspect it is a good thing that she couldn't call her (dsd21 didn't have her mums no) and she headed off this morning a bit glum but ok.

Now i know she gets on well with her mum and that her mum is a lovely caring woman but i think that she gets a bit lonely as her big sis has gone to uni and her mum works long hours. And I also know that we had a fab time because of the holidays and that life is not normally like that and day-to-day life would not be so attractive to her but i just found it heart-wrenching for the poor scrapsad

She has only been allowed visit us for the past year and a half so this was the first time that we kind of bonded. i will miss her too.

scorpio1 Sun 31-Aug-08 14:47:15

it's lovely that you have bonded so well

i think that sometimes they want to stay with us as we are the different from the normal routines, rules etc, and when they visit often arrange things and such.

(am SM too)

ThatBigGermanPrison Sun 31-Aug-08 14:49:04

Og Carmenere, that's so sad, but it's a bit lovely too, isn't it?

Quattrocento Sun 31-Aug-08 14:51:49

THis isn't sad C, it's wonderful and life-affirming. Glad you all got on so well.

xx

Carmenere Sun 31-Aug-08 15:02:53

No I know it is kind of bitter-sweet and i am delighted that she has had such a happy time here but I just wasn't prepared for this aspect of step-parenting, I suppose. The other dsc's mother is a monster so they have always been happier here, and of course they are all older too.

Carmenere Sun 31-Aug-08 17:07:12

Oh God poor dp has just rung me from calais where he was handing dsd over to her mum and dd is sobbing her heart outsad

2rebecca Sun 31-Aug-08 17:11:12

Sometimes kids just don't like change though. When stepdaughter was coming to us she'd moan she didn't want to come and then when she was with us she'd say she didn't want to go back and wished she could come more often.
We just accepted that as kids being kids but unfortunately her mum decided to use her not wanting to comes as an excuse to stop her coming for a while so we now see her less frequently, although when she does come she says she wishes she could stay longer.
Glad the stay went well.

batters Sun 31-Aug-08 17:13:12

I think it is wonderful that your dsd obviously has had such an amazing time with your family that she wants to stay.

Carmenere Sun 31-Aug-08 17:19:33

Well yes I suppose that there is every chance that she was complaining about coming here before she arrivedgrin actually that thought has cheered me up.

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