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Step-parenting

I Dont want a devil child

53 replies

georgia19ox · 24/10/2019 16:20

So my DP has a little girl (4) she stays 2 nights a week sometimes she cant be so nice a loving others she is the devil, my problem is my DP will never tell her off we have a little boy on the way and i really dont want to bring my son up the way he lets his little girl off with things, i put it down to being a spoiled brat in the making and being with adults too much
An example where i dont think her behavior is OK when she kicks and hits our dog in the face lucky he is a saint of a dog but DP lets her do it and it winds me up
i have spoken to him about it before saying he babies her and i dont want my son being brought up like that but he always brushes it off and it really does my head in
i really dont want to but sometimes i really dont like her and when i know shes coming i dread going home :(

OP posts:
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RoLaren · 24/10/2019 16:21

This is the man whose parenting style you have picked to procreate with.

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Suebnm · 24/10/2019 16:22

Has your boyfriend always been like this or only just started when you wanted to have a baby with him?

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Thankyouplease · 24/10/2019 16:23

Surely you knew what type of a parent he was before you got pregnant?

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georgia19ox · 24/10/2019 16:24

No hes not always been like this - its only been very resent

OP posts:
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ICanTuckMyBoobsInMyPockets · 24/10/2019 16:24

You need to tell her off then, as soon as she's done it.

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Moomin8 · 24/10/2019 16:26

Well, as you have figured out this is entirely your husband's fault. A 4 year old cant be blamed for her behaviour and allowing her to hurt the poor dog is terrible.

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RuffleCrow · 24/10/2019 16:27

Sounds like your partner is the real problem. Can you get some joint parenting classes in before bring another child into the situation?

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Majorcollywobble · 24/10/2019 16:27

Because he doesn’t face the issue you will have to .
Above all do not allow her to be alone - ever - with your dog . When it eventually snaps or worse , nips - the poor thing will no doubt be off to the vets or rehomed . If she’s like this with the dog she will no doubt be the same with the new baby . Get your big girl pants on and sort it out !

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swingofthings · 24/10/2019 16:44

How can it be very resent? You don't suddenly change your parenting style!

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Wildorchidz · 24/10/2019 16:53

Can you keep the dog in the garden maybe while she is with you ?

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INeedSleepToo · 24/10/2019 16:57

This reply has been deleted

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Hwory · 24/10/2019 17:00

Don’t want ‘devil child’ should’t have picked devil daddy

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ColdTattyWaitingForSummer · 24/10/2019 17:22

As a pet owner you have a responsibility to keep your pet safe, and to keep visitors safe from your pet. That means you need to make sure that dog and child are separated until she learns to treat him nicely. And it’s on you and your partner to teach her.
But please don’t call this child a devil! Imagine how you’d feel if that was how his next gf was speaking about your dc in a few years?!

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MissSueDenim · 24/10/2019 17:26

i put it down to being a spoiled brat in the making and being with adults too much

Really?

So nothing to do with the fact that your DP left his ex to be with you when she was 3 years old - thus breaking up her family unit - and in no time at all (since she’s now 4) you two are living together & have a baby on the way? Don’t you think all that the change & upheaval might have a little something to do with it?

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LaurieFairyCake · 24/10/2019 17:31

I don't care about any of you, you're all idiots

Apart from the dog - can you find a better owner for him?

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LeftoverPizza · 24/10/2019 17:34

It isn’t her fault, she’s 4. It’s her fathers fault. You shouldn’t have had a child with him if you hate his daughter so much.

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Soon2BeMumof3 · 24/10/2019 17:35

WTF. Why are you standing around while she hurts your dog? It's your dog too. If a strangers kid at the park hurt my dog they'd get a severe telling off from me, regardless of what their parents were doing.

If she hurts your dog, get cross with her! Fuck your DP.

Agree with PPs- calling your SD a devil child is a shitty thing to do. Stop literally demonising a preschooler.

And in the future, if you hate someone's parenting style- don't have children with them and then whine about it.

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MintyMabel · 24/10/2019 17:37

Spending time with adults doesn’t make a child a brat OP.

Exactly. DD spent most of her time with adults, she is far from a brat.

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FrivolousPancake · 24/10/2019 17:47

This is disgraceful.
I’ll never understand why so many women are so quick to procreate with useless men.

Find your poor dog a better home please

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OkayGoooouuuuuullllll · 24/10/2019 17:51

What @MissSueDenim said tbh.

Also, 'devil child', really. I hope nobody says that about your child.

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Branleuse · 24/10/2019 17:55

such a cliche for someone to go right off the existing step child, once they get pregnant themself

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PurpleFrames · 24/10/2019 17:58

I don't think the child wants you tbh.
It's really outrageous you'd talk about a wee girl like that and you should look at what sort of parent you're going to be if you are happy to bully a 4 year old

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pikapikachu · 24/10/2019 17:59

By choosing a man who doesn't punish, you will end up with

  1. a household with different rules for different kids. You and your child will resent your h and dsd.
  2. a child who will act badly because his sister is allowed to.
  3. a dsd who will act worse because her brother is well disciplined so never getting told off.

    Why would you have a child with a man who is not compatible with you in terms of parenting?
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HandsOffMyRights · 24/10/2019 18:00

What an awful way to speak about a 4 year old child.

Why has she been around adults so much? Two good friends are single mothers and they had no choice but to bring their children everywhere from a young age, to socialise with adults.

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AlexaAmbidextra · 24/10/2019 18:03

Can you keep the dog in the garden maybe while she is with you ?

I’d rather keep the child in the garden. Poor bloody dog. Get a grip OP. Nobody would abuse my animal, child or not.

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