DH is an absolute knob

[Iamnotagoddess]

“D” H somehow managed to drive over a curb yday and punctured 2 tyres.

He got the tyres replaced and set off to take his kids home today (300 mile round trip).

He comes back after about 10 mins saying the wheels are making an awful noise and almost demanded to take my car.

I don’t like god driving my car because quite frankly he drives like a twat.

There is some discussion about the girls staying an extra night then they say they are going away in the morning, so I concede that he can take my car.

I then cancel my plans for the day (which involve my car). His ex usually refuses to meet him because she doesn’t want to drive as she’s getting pissed in the pub even though she has a company car, this irritates me further as my day is ruined.

Trying to sort out the sky box and DH calls me then basically has a huge rant at me taking all his frustrations out on me. I am so bloody pissed off with the pair of them really.

[Iamnotagoddess]

Him not god he is most definitely NOT god.

[blackcat86]

Well your partner and he's ex have you on a merry dance don't they. What she does with her time isn't your concern but I can see that it adds to your frustration. Do you always end up coming last in your relationship?

[Iamnotagoddess]

He’s really pissing me off atm tbh.

My DD and DS were here for brunch as my parents were here and I was going to give them a lift home but then DH took my car so they got the bus.

I then saw DD had left her keys here and he’s now kicking off about dropping them back to her (1.5 miles away) and saying “they ate for free” blah blah - what does he expect me do? Charge my kids to eat when I invite them right to eat.

[hadthesnip2]

Probably nothing wrong with his car. I would have used it & gone about your day as planned.

Sounds like you don't like him much though.

[Iamnotagoddess]

I obviously like him, he’s just being totally unreasonable, taking everything out on me and pissing me off at the current time.

He wouldn’t lie about there being something wrong with his car.

[blackcat86]

Oh right I get it now, so his girls must be central and nothing must interfere with their plans or his time with them but your kids better not come over and share a meal with you the freeloaders . Sounds like he doesn't respect your DCs very much.

[SandyY2K]

they ate for free” blah blah - what does he expect me do? Charge my kids to eat when I invite them right to eat

Is he mad? Who charges their kids to eat.

[swingofthings]

He needed to drive his girls back yesterday and his car potentially had a fault. What did you expect he did? This is the perfect example where in a healthy relationship, you would indeed use your partners car, despite the inconvenience.

Clearly an argument entailed and things were said, but I do think you were unreasonable to make such a fuss about using this car in this instance. Your kids getting on a short bus journey exceptionally wasn't the end of the world.

[Pineapplefish]

To be fair, it sounds like the car thing (while really annoying for both of you) wasn't really his fault? And why can't you drop your DD's keys back (as it seems that your car is back now)?

It was unreasonable of him to say your kids ate for free though. Of course you shouldn't charge them!?

[SeagullAteMyChihuahua]

I punctured 2 tyres on my car yesterday and got nothing but sympathy from dp. Whether I drove like a twat or not, it's not like I ever intended to puncture 2 tyres and I doubt your dh did either (it's an expensive mistake to make!).

You two sound like you don't even like each other.

[newmomof1]

I don't think he's an absolute knob - I think he's potentially mildly irritating and you're making a mountain out of a molehill.

Ok it's irritating that he's needed to use your car (not his fault), a bit annoying that he drives like a twat and stupid that he's moaned about dropping of the keys to your (presumably) adult daughter, but we all have bad days. Especially when he's had to pay out for his car then there's still something wrong with it...

[stucknoue]

If his kids live 150 miles away I'm guessing he doesn't see them all the time, and you have to factor in who moved away, if it was him then it is his responsibility to transport them. It seems you do resent his kids, the quip about your dd forgetting her keys sounds like him trying to make a point after you have moaned and moaned about your car and him "having" to drive the kids home. Step families are complex but only function well when both adults accept that the children come first

[MrsDimmond]

I dont understand why you not having a car ruined your plans or what plans you cancelled?

You had your parents and dc with you for a meal. If your dc only llive 1.5 miles away a bus trip is not a big desl or they could walk.

Your DP may well v6e a knob but the way you describe events you were unreasonable first in this instance.

I can't imagine making an issue out of my DP using my car to drive his children 150 miles home.

What is keeping you together?