DSD has decided to be vegetarian

(238 Posts)
Iamnotagoddess Sat 13-Jul-19 18:45:30

We have 6 kids between us 3 have now left home.

DSD who is 14 has decided to be a vegetarian.

Tbh I feel really pissed off (secretly, I would not vocalise this).

I work full time and DH travels a long way to get them so I always prepare the meals and we are a real “meat eating” family and I am not used to cooking veggie meals (I do things to feed a lot of people like Lasange, Cottage Pie) and am not keen on using substitute meat for everyone and haven’t got time to piss about with a separate meal, but obviously can’t insist DSD eats meat although she does go through a lot of fads.

How have others found solutions to this?

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needlessbanana Sat 13-Jul-19 18:51:03

I went veggie at about that age and cooked some of my own meals and some meals my mum made to be veggie. She then usually had some cold meats on the side for those who were keen. Was really not a big drama.

Also, it wasn't a phase, I'm still veggie some 16 years later. Nowadays it is so so easy as well, there's really no shortage of recipes & products.

SlowMoFuckingToes Sat 13-Jul-19 18:53:33

Chucking in sub meat into spag Bol and lasagne instead of mince is easy. The meat eaters are fine with it. The nights she's there she can make her own. Do an easy meat substitute for the night she travels. It's not a big deal.

Firsttimekittenowner Sat 13-Jul-19 18:53:42

How often is she with you? It wouldn't take much to boil some pasta with sauce or make a panini or something else simple.
But at that age she is old enough to make her own food really so I wouldnt worry much about it.

Hiphopopotamus Sat 13-Jul-19 18:58:33

Don’t dismiss it as a phase - your DsD is doing a good thing.
You might be a real ‘meat eating’ family but large meat consumption is decimating the environment and really helping to screw up the planet for your DSD’s generation. Maybe use this as an opportunity to look at your own eating habits and have a couple of veggie nights. Eating a few meals without meat won’t kill you - in fact it may prolong your life and the Earths life

DropZoneOne Sat 13-Jul-19 19:00:20

Presumably she's not there all that often, I'm sure it won't kill you to do a cottage pue, lasagne, spag bol or chilli with quorn mince. Takes no more effort, just needs a bit more liquid than meat.

And then encourage her to cook her veggie bit whilst you do the meat bit.

I became veggie at 17 so a bit older but my mum basically told me i was cooking for myself. After two weeks living off pasta and tomato sauce, i quickly learned new recipes! And this was in the days of soya mix so it's a lot easier now.

Iamnotagoddess Sat 13-Jul-19 19:08:52

I do not want to eat Quorn.

Why should everyone else have to change their diet because she has decided to eat meat?

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Teddybear45 Sat 13-Jul-19 19:11:00

Nobody’s telling YOU to eat Quorn they’re telling it to cook it for your stepchild. You and your kids can continue to gorge yourself into an early grave with red meat consumption.

User10fuckingmillion Sat 13-Jul-19 19:15:15

She’s doing a good thing OP. And veggie meals are better for you.

Plus you could just tell her to make her own!

Iamnotagoddess Sat 13-Jul-19 19:15:18

Presumably she's not there all that often, I'm sure it won't kill you to do a cottage pue, lasagne, spag bol or chilli with quorn mince. Takes no more effort, just needs a bit more liquid than meat

And since when has it not okay to eat meat? We eat mostly (free range) chicken actually the mince means were just examples.

Thing is she isn’t taking it seriously, she had something else earlier (with jelly in it) and I said have you checked that’s suitable for a vegetarian and she laughed and ate it.

Last night we had chicken and she ate it it (a good sized portion) without telling me she had become a vegetarian.

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Iamnotagoddess Sat 13-Jul-19 19:15:59

I respect that people are vegetarians, I do not wish to be one or be preached at about eating meat.

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Lumene Sat 13-Jul-19 19:16:22

Maybe ask OH and her to do the planning, buying and food prep for her meals.

AtSea1979 Sat 13-Jul-19 19:16:41

OP your attitude towards your DSD is quite unpleasant. She’s hardly there and you are moaning about having to eat quorn. Why shouldn’t she eat what she wants to eat? Maybe she’s telling you she’s veggie so you might cook her something healthier, maybe she’s worried about all the red meat you are eating.
If not, Can’t you just buy her a ready meal? Or a veg pizza since oven is on for lasagne anyway. It’s once or twice a week so no big deal.

Iamnotagoddess Sat 13-Jul-19 19:16:50

Making her own is tricky for lots of reasons.

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Gizlotsmum Sat 13-Jul-19 19:17:51

I went veggie at a similar age. It really wouldn't be that much extra effort to make a veggie version along side the meat one of most meals. You could batch cook and freeze as single portions but it sounds like you just want her to eat meat again. I would support her. Help her make her own meals (make sure you have the ingredients in). I am now 43 and haven't eaten meat since then.

Iamnotagoddess Sat 13-Jul-19 19:18:29

Omg we eat more chicken than red meat, and fish.

OH works away that’s my point so it’s all down to me.

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Chovihano Sat 13-Jul-19 19:18:48

I'd solve it quite easily. Not your child, not your responsibility.
She's coming to see your dp so he can pick a veggie mackies up for her on the way back, or cook her something himself.

HerRoyalNotness Sat 13-Jul-19 19:19:15

You don’t have to. I’d make up some big batches of vege chilli, lentil Bolognese etc and freeze portions. Then you just need to or she can, cook herself a portion of rice or pasta to go with it

Chovihano Sat 13-Jul-19 19:19:55

It isn't down to you unless you accept it is. What would happen if your dp was single.
Why are you having sd when he isn't there.

Gizlotsmum Sat 13-Jul-19 19:20:31

Maybe she didn't tell you because she was scared of your reaction? But I can see you are going to enjoy pulling apart any mistake she makes and keep offering her meat only meals... I imagine she will soon stop eating at yours so won't be an issue

AtSea1979 Sat 13-Jul-19 19:21:45

It’s no big deal to whack a pizza in the oven. If you are having chicken then why can’t you just give her a plate of potatoes and veg etc and just get some veg gravy in.
Get your DH to take her to the supermarket when she’s up then she can choose some things.

Iamnotagoddess Sat 13-Jul-19 19:21:49

Tonight I did home made pizzas so had loads of veg but she just wanted cheese and tomoto.

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Cahira Sat 13-Jul-19 19:22:11

My son (8) is a veggie, has been for around 15 months. We're a full time working family and manage, you don't need to cook everything veggie all of the time and it isn't too much of a faff.

Some vegetarian meals are really nice and easy especially a vegetable pasta bake.

theunrivalledjoysofparenting Sat 13-Jul-19 19:22:18

Sounds like you don’t like her much, which is probably affecting how you feel about it.

eating meat 3very night is unhealthy and bad for the planet. It’s easy to do eg baked potatoes with veggie fillings, pasta with veggie sauces, veggie curry or chilli, or risotto.

But... if it’s only a fad and she’s happy to eat chicken, then she’s not vegetarian, is she? So don’t cook her veggie things.

Why not sit down and talk about it to her? Treat her as if she was your own dc? What would you do if it was one of yours?

trilbydoll Sat 13-Jul-19 19:22:52

DH is veggie. Quorn is okay. Tbh I tend to make a vat of quorn chili or bolognaise or curry with the chicken style pieces and freeze portions for him. That's probably easiest for you, you can have whatever you normally have and she can have the quorn version from the freezer?

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