I have a dilemma and donr know where to turn. I have been in a relationship for 2 years to a great girl who has a 6 year old son . I myself have a 7 year old boy who I get only 2 weekends a month due to working shifts.
Things have always been great with me and partner. Her boy has always been an acquired taste. He was great initially but then started acting up really badly . He shouts and tantrums at his mum and hits her when he acts up. Worst of all she says and does nothing and thinks this is ok. Now, my partner is a loving mother and doesn't deserve being treated like that. I have mentioned it before to her but I get my head bitten off by her as she doesn't like her son or her parenting being criticised. The boys behaviour has escalated to him shouting abuse at me like shut up you stupid idiot and get out of my house and he hits me. He is just 6 !!!!I have bitten my tongue but now have tried to educate him and tell him not to say stupid but say silly or dont say idiot as it's not nice . However my partner jumps to his defence and says that he doesn't really know what it means and must have heard it on the tv and he can say it . She undermined me in front of him and now he says it to me constantly and won't stop. Now , I know from reading other threads that there are those who will directly look at it and say it's not my place to say anything and that he's just acting up because he feels threatened or jealous and I agree to an extent. I have tried bonding with him and me and his mum have both spoke to him about how I'm not trying to take his mum away etc.
Anyway , I can deal with the grief I get and the grief his mother gets and would hope that down the line it improves but my problem and why I have turned to writing this post is concern for my son.
My son is the kindest best natured boy you will meet. All he wants to do is play with kids his own age and have fun. I know that sounds biased and it is but it's the truth. Since both boys were introduced a year and a bit ago, my partners son would always wind my boy up , to cut a long story short , over past year he has punched him to the face several times , wound him up to no end , said bloody awful things to him and I feel he is being bullied . Anytime I mention it to My partner it's another argument and her boy is allegedly an angel . My worst fear is now coming true as my boy doesn't want to spend time with my partners boy and says he is mean and he is actually slightly scared of him and this is difficult as I now live with my partner.
After a long time of keeping stuff to myself I blew up the other day. I was watching as my partners boy walked up to mine while he was on iPad and started pushing him, grabbed him by the scruff of the neck and dragged him about living room laughing saying'you are afraid of me ' . I jumped in and told him off. Then he started abusing my boy saying ' your a stupid idiot ' ' get out my house I donr like you idiot'. My boy was really upset. My partner walked in the room just as I told him off and said he cannot say stupid and idiot . And she said he can say it if he wants. I blew my top and nearly 2 years of frustrations came out and told her how horrible her boy was he had no manners and it was her fault. I am now caught between a rock and a hard place as I love my partner but I need to protect my son . I would love to know opinions but really want to know if it will get better. Right now I have it in my head that it won't and I have a duty to my son
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
Connect with other Mumsnetters here for step-parenting advice and support.
Step-parenting
Partners son is a bully
29 replies
Dalyesquire · 20/02/2019 02:38
OP posts:
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.