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Advice please

(10 Posts)
Tinty Fri 09-Nov-18 14:09:57

She didn't finish potty training as in mum still wipes for her.

My dh stopped doing this a while ago however many issues arose with this and had to start again.

So actually it sounds like SD has a problem which her mum helps with by still wiping for her. When your DH stopped doing this, many issues arose with this and he had to start again.

So as much as you are complaining about her Dmum, it actually sounds like your SD has a problem which her Dmum tries to help her with. Whilst her Ddad is just going down the route of every Child can wipe at the age of 9, without really looking at the problem your DSD has.

SandyY2K Wed 07-Nov-18 07:29:55

She wipes herself at your house, so why not at home? At 9 she can express to her mum she can do this by herself.

I don't know what mother wants to be wiping the bottom of a 9 year old. Either the mum or daughter (or both) have issues. She's babying her and not helping with her development.

There are some cultures that baby their children... could it be a cultural issue?

Most people (self included) couldn't wait for my DC to become independent and deal with their own personal hygiene.

Blendingrock Mon 05-Nov-18 20:25:36

mum still wipes for her.

I'm sorry, but unless she has some sort of special needs or physical disability, at 9 years old I find that frankly disturbing. That poor girl. I'd be anxious and not wanting to "go" if my parents were still wiping me at 9 years old too. What on earth is going to happen when she gets her period??

If her Mum can't deal with parenting is there any reason why she can't live with you and your DH?

Please. Get her to the Dr, get her health and diet sorted. Sort out the home situation and do it asap.

whatbeshrekking Mon 05-Nov-18 18:33:44

Sd has not had it easy, mum has had multiple boyfriends, one abusive, multiple moves and generally can't deal with any parts of parenting.

Is your DP going for custody then?

Chew2 Mon 05-Nov-18 17:23:16

She didn't finish potty training as in mum still wipes for her. My dh stopped doing this a while ago however many issues arose with this and had to start again. Something I will not do. Her diet is not great at her mums but we try at our house (plenty of fruit and veg). My dh was a part of her potty training however can only do things at our home and cannot force their mum to do anything at hers.

OP’s posts: |
Snappedandfarted2018 Mon 05-Nov-18 16:57:47

Wtf is this just a dig at the mo, how absurd you would make the remark she didn’t toilet train her child properly who’s 9. Unfortunately children aswel as adults can have problems going to the toilet it doesn’t make it the mothers fault.

lunar1 Mon 05-Nov-18 16:29:08

Did her dad not finish potty training either?

When was she last at the doctors for this? Sounds like she could be constipated, and sickness without illness could point to her being impacted. What's her appetite like?

Lovethetimeyouhave Mon 05-Nov-18 16:13:04

Sounds like you don't like the mum, how can you start potty training but not finish..

Bluebell9 Mon 05-Nov-18 14:55:00

My DSD has issues with her number 2s. She also has stomach aches etc. We think she might be dairy intolerant. Have you looked at her diet?

Chew2 Mon 05-Nov-18 14:52:07

The story is youngest sd, 9, always has had problems with number 2's, (mum started late in potty training and neva really finished). Sd does not go often. Also complains of stomach pains which is an obvious symptom of issues but also headaches and has been sick many times without illness or explanation. Anyone experienced this before?

I work with children and have seen similar symptoms before, usually from anxious children.
Sd has not had it easy, mum has had multiple boyfriends, one abusive, multiple moves and generally can't deal with any parts of parenting.

OP’s posts: |

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