Hi all,
I feel a bit daft reaching out in this way, but my situation is really delicate and I would like a neutral perspective.
I live with my DP and his two children, who split their time equally with us and their mum*. I have been living with them for just over 3 years and care about them all deeply.
BUT, I'm struggling. My DSS (12) has lots of great qualities - he's sparky, he's intelligent and he has a good sense of humour. However, he's also highly emotionally reactive, lacks respect and courtesy and needs to be constantly reminded about basic manners. He's often rude to his dad and doesn't seem to appreciate anything that's done for him, instead being very entitled.
I'm in a fortunate position where I can speak openly and honestly with DP, but honestly DP is pretty rubbish when it comes to any form of 'discipline' and it seems like we constantly have the same conversations without him ever putting strategies into practice to deal with DSS' behaviour.
I'm at a point where, after 3 years of putting every ounce of energy into my relationship with DP, DSD and DSS, where I can feel real frustration brewing and I feel like it's impacting my ability to react in the best way in situations with DSS.
This is very much my family and I don't want to leave, but I don't know how to go forward. There is a lot of love but I put a lot of value in compassion and respect and DSS' lack of moral compass really gets me.
*DSS' mum left a few years ago, leaving the kids behind for a couple of years, and is now very much back on the scene and I feel is making up for lost time, very much bending to every whim of DSS, which doesn't help at all.
Any advice on what to do would be greatly appreciated. I feel like I'm failing.
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Step-parenting
How to deal with DSS' behaviour?
5 replies
ASomebody · 29/10/2018 14:39
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