I just really need some help with this. I've been with my bf for a few years and we've lived together for about half that time. My kids like and respect him. He is a lovely laid back man and he does alot of the things a dad would do for their kids, including helping with homework and cooking their meals etc. My kids live with us full time. My SC stay one night a week. It used to be two but their mum suggested in the week that he collected them from school and took them out for quality time before bringing them home to her, as there is a short motorway journey between our homes and they were having to leave early the next morning for school.
Now we have a situation where one of his kids refuses to come and stay at all and another one clearly cannot stand me. The third SC and I had an incident where he hit my son with a stick in the throat and I went mad with him. However we have spent time together since, I've explained why I was so cross and I've said we can have a fresh start from then on and it seems to have cleared the air and we get on much better.
I've posted before about the fact I'm strict. I don't think I'm overly so but I do expect manners at the table, please and thank you, going to bed at reasonable time with no phone access for the older kids. I think alot of this stuff just doesn't happen in the SC's home.
I think this is probably a big part of why I'm not popular with two of my SC. I think the mum probably says negative stuff about me too.
I get that my children live with my SC's dad and they must find that very hard. I encourage my bf to have 121 time with each of his children and I stay out of the way to allow this. I am trying hard to bond with them but I just get nowhere.
I can't do the whole 'just be a friend' bit with my SC as all the kids in my house are expected to use manners and be kind to each other, so I do say things if this doesn't happen but on the whole I let my bf be the main discipliner of his kids and I discipline mine.
I'm just not sure how to get his kids to get on with me. I'm not into forcing them and I understand it could take time but I just don't know where to go from here.
Might they just never like me? I suppose even being tolerated would be better.
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
Connect with other Mumsnetters here for step-parenting advice and support.
Step-parenting
Help me to help my SC like me
7 replies
CrystalMazing · 19/08/2018 13:41
OP posts:
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.