So dp filed court forms 3 weeks ago and had the hearing today. He explained his side that he only sees dss once a fortnight and wanted more for various reasons for him and dss. To which his ex Sat there outright and said.. Nope no way, that's not happening. I work full time so my time with him is precious.. To which the judge said. That's all well and good but Mr xxx also works full time and his time is precious with dss, and you are keeping your son from him for your own selfish needs and wants. .. He asked dp what he wanted and the judge said that was fair... ( a whole weekend fortnightly .. As that fits around both their works etc and the child will be in a good routine ) she said... Nope no way. Dss does football club on a Sunday . So dp said, yes and I can take him.. She then said but that's MY time and like I say it's just not happening you will not take him from me.
The judge basically told her she was being unfair.
And granted dp the time he wanted with dss.. So dss can see the rest of the family, have bonding time without being on a 24 hr time restriction . To do dad and son stuff. . She then said that's too much and un fair on her.. To which the judge said. MR xxx is well within his rights to ask for more and quite honestly if he did I would grant it. Then asked dp if that's what he wanted. But as dp explained it would be unfair on his dss to be dragged midweek to here as long drive, getting home and pretty much being bedtime before having to get the poor boy up and hr earlier for the trek back. It wouldn't be fair..
He mentioned Xmas.. We had dss most of Xmas day last yr and so would be fair if had him boxing day so he could be with his mum on Xmas day this yr.. She said no.. I only have three days off so I'm with him. We'll do only has two days off so explained it should be alternate Xmas or boxing day. So dss can be with both families for the magic etc. She said no u have him the weekend before. The judge said. But that's not the magic of Xmas. Mr xxx really isn't asking much. And said they should do alternative as requested.
Then it was sch holidays. She said we'll I book holiday club or childcare.. But dp said he has lots of the holidays off so he would like to have him to take him away or whatever we decide to do.. And she tried saying she booked a yr in advance for holiday club.. The judge said we'll if she csa n provide proof of that then fair enough but if not going forward dp will have dss 1 week in summer. 1 in Easter and share Oct and Feb half term. She then stipulated he is never to take him abroad.. But as the judge explained he has joint parental responsibility for dss. Yes she could go to court to stop it, however he could too if the other way around.. Which he didn't as she's taken him abroad twice.
He hated that it came to this as thought they could sort it between them but all the to ing and throwing and games it needed this. Hopefully now attitudes will be changed and things will settle.
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
Connect with other Mumsnetters here for step-parenting advice and support.
Step-parenting
So quick turn around to court..
11 replies
Mum2oneds · 14/09/2017 16:36
OP posts:
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.