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Anxious child and contact

(9 Posts)
SciFiG33k Sat 06-May-17 07:15:13

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anxious child 50/50 contact8
26/04/2017 22:58 SciFiG33k

DSD(5) has been to see two counselors now about her anxiety and highly sensitive nature. She had about 5 sessions with the first counselor this time last year and is on her 6 session with a new counselor. On both occasions DH has been to the first session and then told he doesnt need to attend anymore and just mum should come to the rest. The only suggestion both counselors have given is to change access to 50/50 one week with mum and then one week with dad. Is this just the stock standard suggestion they give to all parents? Is it odd that its the only suggestion they can come up with that could help? Currently DSD is with dad 5 nights a fortnight 2 nights one week and 3 nights the other.

VimFuego101 Sat 06-May-17 07:17:19

I can see how both parents sitting in the room might be overwhelming for her and make her less willing to talk. Would it be possible to try the 50/50 - does DSD want to?

SciFiG33k Sat 06-May-17 07:18:24

Apologies for the odd start of post. Posted this in relationship last week but don't get much of a response. Hoping my fellow step parents might be able to help

SciFiG33k Sat 06-May-17 07:20:36

DSD begs not to go back to mums on a Sunday when she has been at ours since Wednesday so I think she would be OK with it. She hasn't been asked though as she is only 5

ifeelcraptonight Sat 06-May-17 07:25:43

She probably begs mum not to go to yours.

Week about v sensible and can work well with good parental input.

SciFiG33k Sat 06-May-17 07:31:53

Ifeelcraptonight I'm quite sure she does exactly the same at her mums house if DH goes to pick her up there rather than school. Feel so sorry for her sometimes she misses them both so much when she is with the other one.

newfor2017 Sun 07-May-17 07:19:33

DSD was doing week on week off at that age with handovers at school. I think handovers at school are very, very helpful.

newfor2017 Sun 07-May-17 07:21:04

I should add DH and DSD's Mum emailed each other at the end of the week with a run down on DSD's behaviour, health, anything to do with school, any changes they wanted to make to future contact and anything else.

MumOfTwoMasterOfNone Tue 09-May-17 08:03:02

Hi OP, when did her parents separate? Your poor SD. She is only young still and hopefully this anxiety will calm down when she is more secure in how things work and why they are the way they are.

It seems odd, I don't know what difference an extra day would make when she is already having v regular contact with her DF. If anything, I would have thought it was better for her to work on her anxiety and feel one place was her home and maybe have less regular movement between houses (not necessarily less regular contact).

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