I have been with my partner 3 years and we have a 5 month old son. I have a daughter and he has a son and a daughter.
When we started this relationship he didn't have set contact with the kids and his ex wife was dictating when he could see them. That went on for 18mnths till he got a court order and I supported him fully - the children have always been rude and the ss instantly took to bullying my daughter who was 3 at the time ( the dad made excuses for him and insisted if my child just wasn't so friendly to them or happy to see them....grrr ) this went on constant Fallings outs. But he had them at his parents and I could escape. I upped and moved 60 miles away from friends and family ( he said that's what I must do to make a home). I moved he didn't move in, then when he did move in he refused to spend any money as it was my home. I became pregnant, he became awful deciding now he didn't want the baby ( his kids said it 1st he followed) my pregnancy was hell l was ill and unsupported ( I kept going because I thought he may change once the baby arrived).
I had the baby and straight away he moved his kids in ( I asked for time as I didn't feel it was good for anyone) the kids came, hated the baby were rude to me and bullied my daughter ( each time I complained he said I had to chill out and make his kids welcome) the SD behaviour got worse and worse I didn't feel I could even enter my own living room. Anytime I said no or told her behaviour was unacceptable her dad would accuse me of picking on her ( even when she is kicking, hitting me and my daughter and telling lies) . We'll his daughter would start as soon as I saw her and say she didn't want to stay - and tbh I wasn't happy the upset her dad was letting her cause. In the end I lost it a blew up and my partner in front of the kids. It wasn't easy being exhausted caring for 4 kids (3 his while he sat there playing on his phone and having a go at me anytime I suggested his his were far from perfect) . He decided to move in with his parents in Jan leaving me the baby and my 5 year old that calls him daddy.
I've given the kids lots of space and popped in with the baby on Sunday.......straight away the little girl is hostile. She was mean and horrible to my daughter and her dad ignored it even though DD was upset. On the 3rd time I just said you all had to play nice. She kicked off cried and cried while daddy cuddled her. That night she went home and said I had been pinching her, for the love of God I would never. Her mum rungs her dad and he gives me hell . Fast forward 3 days she admits to lying and her brother confirms I never touched her.
No one even apologises - even though his ex has threatened me with social services. I rightly get upset and but hey I'm still the bad guy.
Will I ever win, do I cut them all off. I'm feeling so down. I don't want my baby near these kids :(
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Step-parenting
Guilty father syndrome ruining family
13 replies
Natt1984 · 24/03/2017 15:34
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